needsamiracle
Update
Nov 15, 2007
It's been a while. I was just thinking it was time I check in just in case anyone is reading. lol. I am feeling great. I have so much more self confidence that I don't even feel like the same person.
I went to so many interviews the past month but finally got a job. I will be starting on Monday the 19th. I am thrilled and thankful to God for His blessings.
Physcially I have been feeling great althoug a bit tired still. I kind of think that has mroe to do with not using my CPAP machine when I still need it. I am going to remedy that right tonight! I got it all hooked up and it was titrated down today so I should be okay. I did get a new mask also so, praying that all will go great with that. One thing that I have noticed is that I am no longer SUPER Morbidly OBESE! I am just... Morbidly OBESE! lol. My BMI is also down. It is under 50! I am at a 49 BMI! I am weighing now at 332. I have come so far. From 510 to 332 since April of this year. April 16th to be exact! Yeah to me and Praise the Lord for His miracles.
Well, that is about all the catching up for now.
Blessings to you all if you are reading my sporadic blog. lol.
Six Weeks Post OP
Oct 21, 2007
I do feel like I look the same though. In pictures I can tell a difference but when I look in the mirror I look the same to me as I did before. I talked to my Dr. about this and he said that my brain will be a step behind my body and it just takes time. He wants me to be sure to look at old photos so I can remind myself where I came from in the weight department.
I do find that I have more energy magically now. Like 6 weeks out is a magic number or something.
I am looking for a job very hard and am praying for some results in that department soon.
3 Week Post Op visit
Sep 26, 2007
I had company on the 21st through the 23rd so I managed to just walk all the days my company was here. I was happy to at least do that much.
Monday morning I went back to the pool to swim. It was amazing. I couldn't have been happier about it. I could only swim for 22 minutes straight but it wasn't as bad as I thought it may be. I went back to the same pool as I was swimming at before because I wanted to say "good bye" to the friends I had met there and let them know that I was okay and just moving on to another gym.
Tuesday was my first workout with the personal trainer. Let me just say, "Ouchie". lol I am so sore today and tomorrow I go back. I will be doing weight lifting with her twice a week. It is already paid for and it is something that my surgeon's office makes everyone pay for hoping they will utilize it while they are loosing weight to help them continue to tighten up. I'm happy to be using her and it must be something that works cause it sure makes you sore.
I will be going to the new gym to give it a try either tonight or tomorrow night. I am meeting my DH there to see if it is something we will do. I hope he likes it and wants to do it too. We got a free one day pass so that will be super to work out together. We have never done that before.
I have been feeling pretty good. I may have caught a flu bug though because I was feeling so run down and feverish, sick to my stomach a couple of days ago and my sweet heart, Joel was feeling the same way. I feel great today although sore muscles from working out.
Well, that is about it for now.
16 Days post op
Sep 14, 2007
I haven't had any pain at all except for the couple of days after surgery there were little aches here and there but nothing too serious or nothing deeming pain meds.
I have gotten solidly into a size 26/28 from a 30/32 + which has been amazing and lots of fun. I had tons of clothes to wear that I kept that were too small for me and to be able to pull them out of storage and wash them and try them all on to see that they fit nicely has been like a gift.
I weigh myself at home and am amazed daily at the rate the scale is going down. I kind of don't believe the numbers all the time and am pretty sure that when I step on the scale at the Dr. office for my 3 week post op visit it will all be a lie and I will have not lost anything at all. Silly thinking but it does rattle around in my brain none the less.
One thing that I can't wait to hear the Dr. say on next Thursday the 20th is, "you can go back to exercising again". I miss it so much. Walking is okay but I adore my swimming, weight lifting, biking etc. I have looked into the price of joining a gym instead of going to the physical therapist pool like I was before. I feel more confident and like I can handle the "gym" atmosphere better now. I am doing this for me and if anybody doesn't like to see my fat body working out then they can look the other way.
I have also applied for a job because we are struggling financially and my dear sweet hubby Joel needs some help to pay all the debt and to save money. Next year for the first time literally ever in our marriage of 22 years, we will be taking a real honest to goodness vacation. We will be going on a cruise to Mexico with one of my sisters at least and her family. All 3 of my sisters are invited and their families, their own expense of coarse, but I don't think any of them will come. It will be okay. I do get along super good with my sister Patty. She and I both have a sick and twisted sense of humor and we have fun together. I am so looking forward to it. I will be hopefully at least 100 pounds lighter and have my braces off!
Nothing else new going on except I have applied for a couple of jobs that I am hoping to hear back from in the near future.
I had my surgery on Wednesday August 29th!
Sep 01, 2007
The biggest thing that happened to dissappointment me is that my sister Terri that was supposed to stay with me for 3 weeks following surgery asked to go home. I am so hurt by that. I really needed her here with me. My husband works 2 jobs right now and leaves at 5 a.m. not returning home until after 9 p.m. So, I will be on my own basically! I told her that I really wanted and needed her to stay but it didn't matter, she wanted to go home and so, home my hubby took her. She made excuse after excuse about why she needed to go home from her kids, ages 10, 17 and 20 needing her even though their step dad is home to her saying she just wanted to be here for my surgery and that she saw my surgery went well so she can go now. I didn't need her when I was in the hospital, I had the nurses in there, at home is when I needed her for help walking on walks, doing laundry, staying near by when I shower etc. I guess I should have guessed she would be like that. Oh, well.
I am dissappointed that I have gained 6 pounds since my surgery! That stinks but it is something I expected. They pump your belly so full of gas and water it is bound to make a difference in my weight. I am going to try to stay off the scale for the rest of the week. Maybe weigh after a full week.
Tomorrow is my surgery Date
Aug 28, 2007
I guess I will just try to relax and enjoy my evening.
2 Days before surgery!
Aug 27, 2007
Well, it is 2 days before surgery and I am not a bit nervous yet. I think because I am keeping myself really occupied. lol. If I sit down and think about it I may go bonkers. 
I had a great month with lots of exercising and Optifast only. lol. I have done a few things this month that I have never been able to do or haven't done in a loooong time.
On the 7th of this month I went to the orthodontist., I wear braces, and ever since I started going there at 510 pounds I could never fit into the chairs in the waiting room. I tried it on the 7th and TAAADAAA. I fit! I was so happy I felt like I was floating on air. I kept getting up and grabbing a newspaper or going to the restroom just to see if I still fit when I sat back down. I bet the people in the waiting room with me thought I was crazy. lol.
On the 16th I went to see my surgeon for all my test results and anything else he wanted to tell me about my surgery. All of my results look wonderful he said and I was ready for my surgery. He did tell me to try to continue to exercise and eat only Optifast shakes until surgery.
On the 20th I went to visit my parents in Payette Idaho. I live in NOrthern Idaho so it is about a 6 hour drive from ehre. It was a great visit like always. I love to spend time with my Parents and my Uncle that lives down there. It was nice. I also got to meet a new great friend that I had met on Obesity Help site. Her name is Kristi and she has a beautiful family. Her husband Alan is a super nice man and her little boy Spencer, well, let's just say I'm in love with that little guy. What a doll. I have posted a photo of Kristi, Spencer and myself. I showed her my scrap book that I am doing and she seemed to enjoy it. Her surgery is coming up soon so hopefully anything I do can only help her along. She is doing well getting towards her goal of 60 BMI. I shared with her that I myself had to get to that BMI too. Now I am at 57 BMI. To think that in April of this year I was at 73 BMI. Wow!
When I came home from Payette, I went to the county fair here where I live. I haven't been to the fair since I got married in 1985! I didn't have any panic attacks at all. It was nice. On Sunday was the big challenge for me. I went to the walk in movies. I haven't gone to a walk in movie since 1994! I haven't been able to fit in the seats. It was such a great feeling to be "normal" and be able to fit in the seats. Granted I am by no means a "normal" BMI or size but I am getting closer every day!
Well, my surgery is in two days and I will update again after I get home from the hospital.
I have a date for surgery
Aug 01, 2007
I finally have a date for my surgery. I will be having my surgery on August 29, 2007! I have lots of things to do before surgery for the Dr. but so far, so good. He wanted me back on Optifast only and I am having a hard time with it. I only got to eat for two days but, I truly want to keep eating now. Not like out of control or anything just.... eat. I am going to make a calendar for myself that I can use to hopefully help me through this waiting thing. I have lost 103 pounds so far. I have about 247 more to go for the goal I set for myself. I want to be at 160. I am willing to work hard for it to happen and I realize it will take a lot of hard work. I think I'm up to it.
My appointment with the surgeon was good. After waiting for this appointment with such anticipation I was surprised by how nervous I was. My niece went with me and I thank God for that because I was so scared. Having someone that loves me there was perfect for me. I had written down about 3 pages of questions and the surgeon was very patient while we asked them all. He said that I would have to go see the heart Dr. for clearance because my EKG was abnormal. Yikes! That is a scary thing too.
The surgeon told me the risks with surgery and he also told me I would have to follow a strict regimen of vitamins and no sugar. Pretty much things I already know. He examined my tummy and told me I would have a huge Panis (sp) I got pretty upset at him saying huge. Later I was told that he was just letting me know that he expects I will be successful at this and my panis will be big or excuse me..... huge because of that. I guess I will take it as a compliment. lol. I maybe a bit over sensitive. Ya think. lol.
After leaving the exam room following the surgeon to his scheduler. He told her to cut my program fee of $1500 in half because I have already paid so much for the Optifast program and that I can go to any of the group meetings for free now! I was so thankful to the Lord first of all and of coarse to the surgeon for saying that. She set up all my appointments from now until my surgery with the exception of a 2 time exercise program that my surgeon makes everyone go to. I need to set that up with them directly.
I already had my appointment with the nutritionist and the psycologist. They both went very well. I loved the psycologist. She was an amazing person and I got so much out of it including someone to pray for. Her grand daughter Ashley is only 19 months old and has cancer. I definately will be praying for her. She showed me a picture of her and she is such a beautiful child with RED hair. Darling really. Anyone who reads this, she could really use the prayers I think she is a sick little baby.
On the 9th I am not allowed to do any exercise to prepare for my appointment on the 10th to check my resting Metabolic functions. I will have to fast for it and also for my ultrasound the same day. I am not used to skipping exercise so that will be hard on me. From what I hear, it is a breathing test of some sort. I'll have to let everyone know later.
I then see my surgeon, Dr. Pennigs again on the 16th. My surgeon said, "It wouldn't hurt his feelings if I lost another 20 pounds"! Okay, I am trying my best. That would put me at under 400 pounds. Something I haven't done in years! I hope I can do it. I am a bit in a daze about the whole thing. It is happening so quickly. Lucky for me because I don't wait for things very patiently. lol.
I had to go to my first of two preop group meetings. There were 7 of us in there. All women except for one man. Everyone is having lap band except for myself and one other lady. For the group meeting we went to a room and chatted for a couple of minutes then we all went on a tour of the hospital. That gave me butterflies actually. The nurse giving us the tour showed us the rooms and allowed us to ask questions. It was neat to do that. She said we are allowed to have a family member spend the night with us. I am having one of my sisters come to stay with me and she said that she wants to stay at the hospital with me. I am leaving it totaly up to her because, I may be out of it pretty much is what I'm thinking. It will be nice to have her there. I am hoping and planning to walk, walk, and walk some more if possible.
Well, I am excited and rambling I guess. lol. I'll try to update how every preop appointment goes and what they do.
Oops! One that I almost forgot is my appointment with the heart surgeon. He said my EKG looked fine. He did ask me tons of questions and listened to my heart a bunch. Thankfully everything is good there. He feels that I am in no greater danger than anyone else at this time. I was so relieved to hear that. He says the very best thing I can do for my heart is to...... loose weight. Wow! What a surprise that was. lol.
Okay, I'm off for now.
Finally the Right BMI
Jul 10, 2007
I am very happy about my progress and I am exercising about 2 hours every day but, I just don't see a difference in my body when I look at myself. I hope I can soon see a difference.
Not having Lap Band
Jun 19, 2007
After much prayer, reading and talking to my Dr, I will be doing the RNY instead of the Lap Band. I feel great about it and nervous at the same time. I just want to start living again.
I was at my Dad and Mom's house for the weekend and on Sunday it was my birthday and Father's Day of coarse. They had a bar b q with all the fixings and I didn't stray off Optifast one single bit. I am so proud of myself and really think that I getting stronger and stronger daily about not being under the control of food any more.
Hopefully the next time I write I will be at or near my goal to have the surgery!
