pokey6801
life
Oct 14, 2006
I am a disabled nurse who continued to gain weight with several assaults at work. I am unable to exercise effectively because of a back injury therefore am unable to loose the weight I need. It is a nasty circle and I have chosen to go the route of weight loss surgery to change my body and alleviate some of the daily pain I am under. Being in
I have heard that Dr. Reed in
Hard to go from a Nurse making $28/hr to an ODSP pension.
Ain't life grand.
Well hopefully soon I will have my surgery, loose the weight and become healthy enough to keep up with my husband and 2 "tweens." God help me here comes puberty.
If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off!
Did not apply for approval from OHIP and was reading about everyones problems with approval so I called the doctor's office to ask. Apparently I am sick enough to qualify for approval so it is not an issue. High blood pressure, degenerative disc desease and results of the new MRI show 4 bulging discs in lumbar spine plus osteoarthritis and schmorl's nodes. Heaven only knows what the cervical MRI will show. Counting the days to Feb 14th!
Stop the world I wanna get off
I wanna cross my legs!...I wanna wear high heels again! I wanna go for a long walk without doubling over from the back pain. I tried to walk today and it was soooo painfull I wanted to pass out or throw up. This sucks. When is March going to get here? How long after the March visit do I have to wait for surgery? Man this is so depressing. Husband is having a family reunion on Dec 17th, I get to go and be Mutt to his Jeff again. Can you believe someone at our wedding actually said that? He is approximately 1 half of me. I weight almost 300 and he weighs 150. I can not wait to be his size, I want him to pick me up and carry me away. I wanna be healthy and I wanna say nanna nanna boo boo to all the people who think I am less a person because I weigh so much.
Future Update
Wow Is it Christmas already? If you look at the message board a lot of people are getting their dates for surgery. I am jealous. I feel so sick all the time these days. The meds to stop my heart from blowing up are making dizzy (not that I wasn't dizzy enough already..lol) sick to my stomache, headaches..the list goes on. The weather is making my body hurt even more, and without the ability to take pain pills it just sucks. Going to have to call the specialist in
Future Update Aug 3rd 2006 Aug 15, 2006 Aug 16 2006
Wow Did I get lucky before Christmas. !st off
I stopped taking the adalat and the headaches and numb hands have gone away. Blood pressure even lower than when I was taking it. Go figure.
Well hope everyone is good and has a great holiday.
Boxing Day
Well What a great Christmas. Other than this friggin chest cold. High blood pressure which means no meds for cold...uugghh!.
Kids got everything they asked for, hubby was happy, me too! I got diamond earings woohoo. It was very quiet and peacefull, happy and relaxing. I hope everyone elses was the same.
Jan 5th
Holy wow! 2006
Would you believe I ditched the chest cold and picked up a stomache flu...yuck haven't had this since I was a kid. So New Years was very quiet.
Started getting my tests done for surgeon appointment. MRI of neck and chest, Abdominal ultrasound. Next step upper GI and blood work. some fun huh?! Local newspaper is thinking of doing story on me and following me through procedure. Should I? Talk about exposing oneself. Need more thought on that idea. All is well and clock ticking down for 1st visit, can't wait. Later.....
I have really enjoyed coming onto this web site and meeting all the supportive people. I read every ones profile and postings and it makes me sad sometimes. It would seem that everyones families are supportive and care about their journeys
" Have I mentioned how much I love my hubby?
So I'll go this journey alone. I'll make it, make my kids proud of me and be all the more healthier for it.
Jan 29th and its my birthday.
Yuck what a day. Big ass snow storm and freezing rain. They even cancelled the bingo due to the weather. So guess what I did? Sat around watching movies and eating. Depressed over the future. What will happen to me? Will I get the WLS or will my neck injury stop it? Will it move the WLS up? MRI shows alot of damage to my neck. Bone spurs indenting on my spinal cord and nerves. Very good possibility I will need spinal surgery. . My hands are numb all the time now, almost blacked out a couple of times, pain is just driving me nuts. How can I be 38 and feel this bad? Please make the pain go away.
Well all the results are in. All tests normal. Now all I have to do is figure out how to get an earlier surgery date. On jan 31st he was handing out June 8th. How my impending neck surgery fast tracks my date. I really want to be skinny and healthier for the neck surgery.
Had to drive all the way to
Future Update
WOOHOO! 20 more days till the big trip to
Future Update
Well it was a long trip but worth it. I HAVE A DATE
Future Update
Holy cow! Did WSIB ever mess up. Had my appeal hearing yesterday, turns out we did not need it. My advisor had applied back in 2003 to open a file on my injuries from 1994. Turns out adjudicator dropped the ball and send papers to a 15 year old address in
Now I can get off of ODSP and catch up on my bills and buy a reliable car.
Not to mention having enough to nuy a new wardrobe next year.
Just thought I would update you all as most of you know my struggles.
E.
Future Update
Ok so the time is getting closer and closer but my health is failing.
Really tired and achey all the time. Heart pills making me sick, dizzy all the time. I want to be able to bounce outta bed and go like I used to. I want the pain to ease off a bit, I know, I want it all.
I visit with friends and one says " wow this is the biggest I have ever seen you." I must really be FAT now, but I never really seen it. It is very depressing.....Sept can't come fast enough.
Well it's time for the drag races again. Our family had so much fun last year we r doing it again.
Big shock today when doc's office called with all my dates. I have to be in
PS..... lost 3 lbs
just have to publicly announce how happy I am with my husband and how much I love him. He has never been over 155lbs from the day I met him 19 years ago. 19 years ago I was the same size as him (a 29 " waist jean). He has stuck with me through all my trials, all my injuries and accidents at work and gaining the extra 150lbs. Not once NEVER has he complained about me being over weight or called me any names referrring to it. Never put me down or insult me in anyway. He is very supportive over this decision to have surgery and is ready to do anything I need him too. He instists I do it for the right reasons (to be healthy). It is our 15th wedding anniversary in 7 days and I need to find someway to express my love for him....any ideas? Thanks for listening.
I must say that after reading of Tammy's death due to a heart attack I was really scared for a few days. Then I realized that I am not as sick as Tammy was going into the surgery so I don't think I have as great a chance of something dreadfull happening. The kids have been gone to camp this week and I fell off the diet wagon. Must get back on this week as I only have 45 days to go. Time to buy the protein drink powder for the last 2 weeks before surgery. Gotta shrink my liver. Off to cuddle with hubby.
Oh my!!!!! The kids have gone to summer camp for a week and you would think I would be able to sit and just relax right????......Well of course not. I am pulling my own version of "While you where out" The oldest room is getting camaflauge with a huge "Monster Garage" logo mural while the younger one got red walls with flames up from the floor on one wall along with a Orange county choppers bike logo. I can't wait to see their faces. I have had help with the housework and completely gutted out the basement and rearranged it all so after my surgery in 44 days!!!!!!! I won't have to worry. I can't beleieve the time has flown by so quick. Only 44 more days and I will be on the losing side.....yippeee.
Aug. 20 Sept 26th, 2006 Dec 28th,2006 Feb 28th,07 Dec 28th
Kids came home from Camp and freaked out about their rooms, they just loved them. Made me feel like all the work was worth it.
Aug 20, 2006
Man our car has leprosey every time it goes out it loses new parts on the road. Guess it is the long haul on the hound for surgery for me.....yikes
Oh MY 30 days till surgery and just a lil bit nervous about it.
Pass the lorazapam....lol.
Aug. 2nd 2006
Holy cow. Am I making the right decision? Is this all for vanity? Sometimes I think so, then the pain in my back flares up reminding me why I want to be skinny again. In all honesty I do want to be pretty again and wear nice clothes. I want my kids to be proud of me and not have their peers tease them about how fat their Mom is. Seen Dr. Mclean again, whatta quack he is, "nothing I can do for your pain, keep on moving" I really am hoping that taking this extra 150lbs off my frame is going to help with the pain. I have been thinking all kinds of messed up thoughts lately. If I die who will take care of Howie and the kids? They r living on my ODSP pension, what happens if I die, where do they get money to live on?
Should I write them "in case of" letters? Telling them how much I love them and why I am doing this?
Oh man I am throwing myself into a panic attack so I am off to take a Lorazapam and play a game of crib. Bye for now
Boy am I tired. Back from
(nothing fell off.....lol)
Bed time
neck.................18.7".............16.........................15.5
left arm............18.7..............15.5........................15
right arm..........18.8..............16...........................15
chest................53.................47.........................45
waist.................51.................44........................42
hips.................60...................52........................51
right leg...........32.4................30........................28
left leg.............33.7...............30..........................28
right calf..........20.2................17...........................16
left calf............20.5.................17..........................16
Sept 28th 2006 Dec 28th 2006 Feb 28th 2007
322 lbs 260 lbs 240lbs
Oct 10th, 2006
Well my internet went out and I am at least on dial up until my DSL gets reconnected. As for my surgery it was really un eventful.
Arrive at Guelph Hosp about 2 am day of surgery. Sleep in car for 4 hrs....very unhappy about this. Neverous tired and cranky.
6 am get into hosp on surgery admitting desk. Paper work then into pre op area. Nice gown....lol hat and booties. Give hubby kiss and off I go
Remember sleepy juice hurt as it was going in. Lights out.
Hubby says I was outta surgery by 11 and in my room by 2pm. IV fell out of vein and I had a big bruise on my arm. Sleepy doc put it on other arm. Told hubby I loved him and to go to his moms house to sleep.
8 pm. Needed to pee so off I go walking IV pole to bathroom. Then took a couple of walks around the flloor.
Hardly need pain killer so the took it out on Sat. Did alot of sleeping.
mon
had a leak test and all was great, on way home by 12 noon.
No probs, no infections lil pain. LOTS OF HEAD HUNGER.
Home and feeling pretty good, lost 30 lbs, moved from clear to full fluids, happier. Post again soon.
Christmas was quiet and life is good. I am down 65lbs now and lost a total of 39 inches. My back is friggin killing me and I have to go for another MRI after holidays.
