Apr 18, 2017
I just wanted to let you know how hard this has been for me. I want you to know I love you even though I haven't seen you yet, only imagined you in my mind. I have struggled so long trying to just love this me, what I realized was self love is the hardest most judgemental love of them all! I remember when I was younger thinking I couldn't be a lawyer becaues I didn't feel my personality fit...yet in reality I didn't want to commit to the work, I thought it would be too hard, I didn't want to try just to fail. I remember when I finally filed for a divorce and I drove to AZ leaving everyone saying it was for a job when in reality it was to run a way for all of the pain that I didn't what to face so I ran...I could go on and on about things I did because I didn't want to put in work and running...just plain giving up or not trying at all was way, way easier...But not this time I am staying...I fought to be better losing 90 lbs once for you...because I love you, I love you enough to know that I needed help so I'm getting it...this time I know I'm worth the fight... when so many others have let me down...I didn't...I love me and I love you, you are worth it!