Redboots
I’ve had a lifetime of poor body image, self esteem, and weight problems. I’m turning 30 this year and have had it. I gained 80 pounds onto my already overweight frame of 150 pounds with my pregnancy... (Being 5’1, that 150 pounds was a low for me that I had worked very hard at ...and was single at the time..and had all my time dedicated to me). My son is now almost 15 mo. old and I’m only 40 pounds down....I’m really struggling now that I have a family I’m finding it extremely hard to find the right lifestyle/balance. Meal planning is sometimes a nightmare now. Before I loved to cook low carb. Between raising a toddler and suffering from burnout, I’m at a loss on how to live my life and desperate to get back to at least my pre pregnancy weight. Thankfully I have the support of my fiance behind me to dedicate this year to regaining my happiness. It is unfortunate, but my happiness is base on my weight. Everything in my life has suffered from being overweight. It has held me back from so many things I’ve wanted to do. I just wanted to be a thin person everyday of my life, always wanted to be able to lay out in my bathing suit with my friends, go surfing, be social in summer time, wear a sexy dress to a christmas party..ect. I’ve never been fully happy because I always wanted to be thinner. I worked out the same as all my team mates in high school sports, even dieted when they chugged down soda and gorged on pizza, chips, and fast food. It always felt so unfair. I’m an adult now , or at least trying to be one and I’m still struggling with the fact that I still have not figured out how to control my weight. My life is always changing, my fiance and I are on the go alot and we enjoy traveling. I want a wedding but won’t do it until I’m thin. I just don’t want to loose weight for a wedding, I want a new life, one that starts over at 30. When I have my grandchildren sitting around me someday ... I can have a thin lifetime to tell them about or share stories of....not my fat childhood, teens, college years spoiled and devastating pregnancy. I’m desperate for help and just want a chance at being happy. Surgery is desperation to me and I’m struggling for answers and searching for people like me, for inspiration and guidance and support. I hope to make friends on here and beat this sadness being fat has plagued my life with.
