Day 6...I can't believe tomorrow will be a week since my RNY!

Aug 02, 2011

Day 6 has brought a little more insight towards my body and my mind when it comes to my surgery and future.  Yesterday I had a major freak out when I was able to eat 3/4 a cup of food for dinner.  Thankfully some helpful OH folks let me know that if you let yourself, you can eat a lot more during this stage because the soft pureed foods are all "sliders" and go through your stomach as you are eating them.  But they also brought up some good points... just because I *can* eat 3/4 a cup doesn't mean I should.  At this stage I should only be eating small amounts otherwise I'm putting my pouch at risk and I won't see the benefit of rapid weight loss.  Although I remember reading it before surgery, I didn't really remember that the nerves in the stomach are severed during surgery and will take awhile to grow back.  This explains why I am never getting that "full" feeling that I am used to.  This also explains why the constant hunger I'm feeling (which is FINALLY starting to ease, by the way) isn't as much physical and in my stomach but more in my chest (obviously you can't feel REAL hunger in your chest, silly!)  

Not having a physical feeling of hunger or fullness is pretty scary and although most people seem to get it back when the nerves grow back 3-6 months post op, some people are 3 years out and still don't have it.  How the heck do they function?  Apparently many people have turned to other signs that have come as a result of the lost feeling.  I have heard quite a few different "signs" that people claim tell them they are full.  One lady said she knows she is full when her body sends out a series of 3 hiccups.  Another says that everytime she needs to stop eating, her nose starts running.  A few others have mentioned a hiccup/burp pehnominom.  It's amazing how our body feels a loss and steps in with a creative way to compensate!  So now I'm on the search for "my sign".  So far today I have noticed a hiccup (two separate occasions) and my nose just started running as I was drinking a protein shake.  Maybe it's my sign? 

Other fears/concerns/insanities of the day are still revolving around my ability to eat more than I should and the realization that my post surgery "habits" aren't that healthy as of yet.  I haven't been measuring my food out because I thought I'd know when I was full- obviously not going to happen.  I also haven't been tracking protein or fluid very well.  With tomorrow being my week "surgiversary" as the pros seem to call it, I really need to start! 

And of course I still can't get over how easy things have been for me so far.  Tonight is literally the first time I have ever felt any stomach discomfort from eating too much.  I have continually been able to take much larger than "tiny" sips recommended.  And I have no major pains or other side effects.  It's so strange.  Most people tell me that I should be thankful it isn't any more difficult but I can't help but feel a little guilty.  It can't be this easy, right?  And if I don't have the huge struggles and tribulations in the beginning, I have more of a chance of failing, right?  *sigh*  I hope I can get ahead of this "fail talk" before it goes much farther...

Any which way I look at it, I am thankful to be alive, healing and losing some of the padding that has encumbered my life for so long.  Wherever this journey takes me, I just need to be happy with it!  After all, I only have one of these lives to live.

0 Comments