Well..here goes.

I graduated high school at 165 pounds and went off to college. There I gained 52 pounds my freshman year and continued to gain as I stopped exercising, started eating pasta bar all the time and then married a chef at age 20. When I was 21, I got pregnant at a weight of 266 lbs and never lost the baby weight. In fact, I continued to gain after giving birth until I reached 318 pounds and size 28 jeans. When he started walking and I couldn't keep up with him, I knew I was in trouble. I hated getting down on the floor to play cause I knew I wouldn't be able to get back up again. I also hated myself as I used to be a flirt, confident and outgoing..now I was just embarrassed. I had the surgery Aug 25, 2009 and in these last 6 months, I have lost 110 pounds and have gone down to a size 16. I am confident again, outgoing and sometimes a little bit of a flirt. I love how I feel playing with my son and husband, and I am not ashamed to be out in public, in fact, I crave it. My weight loss is slowing down now but I want to keep losing. I am not exercising or eating right and although I feel wonderful, this hasn't been an easy journey. I can't get meat to agree with my system and the lack of protein is making my muscles sore after every workout and my hair is falling out worse than I have ever seen before. I also struggle with feeling so good about myself because in some ways, I feel like a teenager again. I just want to go and have fun because it feels good to be hit on and flirted with..I never had that chance before. I love my husband and my son so much and I would never want to hurt them, so it is confusing to me why I want to go out and be hit on. I do not regret having the surgery, it has been wonderful to me; I am just looking for support here from hopefully someone going through the same thing or who can help me piece together the craving for this new sexuality and why it is making me unhappy with what I've got.

About Me
32.6
BMI
RNY
Surgery
08/25/2009
Surgery Date
Mar 03, 2010
Member Since

Friends 1

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