Today is my 6 month Surgiversary!

Feb 12, 2009

Today is my 6 month Surgiversary! I've not posted in a really long time. So here it goes.

I have been on a quite a journey.

I grew up taking care of a mentally challenged mother. So I found a man who needed taking care of and I married him. After years of taking care of him, and ignoring my needs, I realized that I my mind and my body were sick. My marriage had been in trouble for quite a while. And we finally had forgotten to communicate with each other. He had the selfishness, immaturity, financial strain, and I enabled him for all of these years. I had literally started eating my emotions and fell into such a dark and desolate depression that I couldn't even see straight this past couple of years. 

 He started giving me ultimatums and threatening me so I decided that it was best if I moved out. And I did on December 15th. Since then I've been getting counseling, I'm getting healthy & losing weight, I'm starting to like myself and I've realized that it's ok to do things for me, to take care of me.

Only God knows my heart, and my intentions. And His standards are the only one I am trying to live up to. I go to a weight loss surgery support group monthly, I see my doctor every 6 weeks, I have attended a Beth Moore Bible Study on Esther (wow - what timing!), I am singing in 2 choirs that I LOVE, I have started seeing a counselor to deal with my recent divorce. I have also just finished a 13 week class of Divorce Care at church. So I am doing all that I can to get my mind, body, Spirit, and emotions back onto a healthy track.

I am keeping my trust in God and my focus on me. I've realized that I couldn't love anybody else until I learned to love myself. And I'm ok with that.

So today is my 6 month Surgiversary. Because of all of this, or in spite of it I've lost 51 pounds!!

And that is where I am right now.

Thanks for listening,
Tammy

2 Comments