Joni J.

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So it's been 11 days since my surgery.  I'm feeling good, better everyday.  I'm not taking prozac anymore, which just proves the power of hope.  I guess a lot of my depression the past couple of years stemmed from poor diet, and lack of hope for a normal life.  (also it's been almost a year and half since my 8 year relationship ended)  I think I'm done grieving that.  Now that I know I can do this I am well on my way to a happier healthier life.  I've lost just over 17lbs since the 1st when I started the pre-op diet.  I was very impressed with my surgeon, and he even recorded the procedure to a dvd so I could watch it later.  It was pretty gross, but fascinating.  I made a bunch of my friends who were interested watch it as well.  I've not been very secretive about the surgery for the most part.  I am not ashamed that I needed the help to give me back control, but I'm already irriatated at some of my co-workers for using it as "competition" to motivate themselves.  One lady said "the race is on, I'm on nutrasystem"  I guess if that's the kind of motivation that helps her that's fine, but I don't think she realizes how inconsiderate it is when she has 30lbs to lose and I have 140 lbs to lose.  

side note:  FUCK INSURANCE COMPANIES!!!
there, I feel better.  Mine will not pay for anything to treat obeisity, if anyone knows how to go about fighting this let me know.  I'm blessed to have family support in this matter.  My mom cashed out a life insurance policy to help and contributed even more from the inheritance money from my grandfather's recent death (I miss you grampy!)  My sister is a doctor just out of residency and has almost paid off all the advance money she took when she got her first real job.  So she will soon have the means to help as well, I financed the rest.  In a couple of years I'll have paid it off entirely.  You really can't put a price on good heatlh, but alas it costs alot sometimes.  I'm so thankful my family has made this possible.   blah blah blah, check ya later.

So tomorrow is the big day.  Surgeon called today to let me know I have been bumped up to an earlier time.  1st case has a bad cold.  That was actually a big fear of mine because I was so worried about surviveing the pre-op diet, and it's been almost a 2 month wait in scheduling.  I have faith that I've chosen a really good surgeon, and so far have been very impressed with the staff and the help they provide.  I'm also amazed at how well I have done on the pre-op diet.  It hasn't been as difficult as I thought it would be, and I have been craving things like chicken nuggets, bratworst, and taters.  I figured I'd be dying for sweets but haven't actually thought much about sugar.  Anyway, I'm still more excited than nervous, but I'm sure I'll be nervous when the time comes.  Someone I told about the surgery called it cheating yesterday.  I know it's more of a response to the fact that I"m going to have control of my life again, and he will still be struggling.  But it was still kind of hurtful.  I wouldn't be going through with this, if I thought I had any chance of acheiving weight loss and improved health without help.  Anyway, looking forward to a better life, and a week off of work.  :P