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After three attempts plus an x-ray, my fill doctor was finally able to find my port and give me a small fill. I already feel a difference, and have been satisfied with 'normal' portions for the past three days. That's a first for me and I'm LOVING it.

But despite the fill, I won't be losing much weight in the foreseeable future because I recently discovered I'm pregnant with my second child, due sometime in late December or early January. Even so, I now feel confident I will be able to limit my portions to a reasonable amount and hopefully avoid the big preggo (and post-preggo) gains I experienced with my son.

I actually gained a pound in the eight weeks since surgery and was feeling pretty down about my prospects, but my little fill has turned me around and I'm really hopeful for the future. Even if the moderate restriction I feel now doesn't last, at least I know it really can happen for me, and believe me, I had some serious doubts about that  before!

Will keep you all posted on my progress.

I had an appointment for my first fill April 7th. I know it often takes several fills to get restriction, but having one would be a start. Unfortunately, it wasn't meant to be: my fill doctor couldn't find my port. He consulted with my surgeon and asked me back for a second appointment yesterday but still no luck. Apparently I'm the first one in the city this has happened to, and my doc is now investigating how to get a fluoroscopy procedure done (not as common in Canada as in the US). Oh yeah, I'm still gaining weight. Another ten pounds or so and I'll be back to what I weighed before my gruesome three week pre-op diet.

I'm normally a very positive person, but this has been tough. I have faith that it will work though, and that long term, everything will be fine.

I'm struggling horribly right now. I have no restriction (no fills) and have been pigging out. I haven't lost any weight, and I'm disgusted with my behaviour. Every days starts out with the best intentions, but I always stray from my plan.

I know Bandster Hell is tough, and that I just have to force myself to diet until the fills start kicking in, but let's face it, if I were a good dieter, I wouldn't need a lap band!

Feeling very discouraged, but trying to stay positive. Wish me strength.

I got my band yesterday, and after all my worry, it was pretty anti-climatic. My pain is totally manageable, I'm able to walk pretty much normally (bending is a little dicey), and I've survived the first day of just water, and now the second day of just clear liquids.

I've noticed I do have a bit of fear of stuff getting stuck, even liquids. I'm supposed to try for 2.5 litres of water each day, but it's hard to do that when I'm afraid to take more than the tiniest sip. I guess the band and I have a lot of learning to do together.

Will keep you all posted!

I'm leaving to go the clinic today. It's about a six hour drive. I'll have my band in 26 hours!

After what seems like an eternity of existing on some rather awful low-cal meal replacement shakes, my upcoming lap band surgery is finally starting to feel like a reality. I didn't think I'd actually make it through this liquid pre-op phase -- and I haven't yet, with three more days to go and a couple small cheats under my belt -- but the time has passed more quickly than I thought it would. Even so, at this point, I just want to get it over with so I can get into the post-op stages and eventually get to eat something again. I'm sure there's some irony in the fact I want a WLS procedure so that I can satisfy my food fixation, but I'm too hungry to reflect much on it right now.