windowoftheteeth
I am just getting started on this whole WLS issue. I put it off for too long and am now regretting that. We are in the Army, my husband as a soldier and me as a stay at home mom of 3 kids. As of now we are scheduled to go to Germany in August and I am afraid that I have waited too long to get this all done before I have to go. Basically I am pumped up about all of this but I am afraid that there is not enough time.
Well the ball seems to be rolling along nicely here on the WLS trail. I have completed my psych eval and have had my first letter sent to Tricare for approval. I hear that it takes about a week to get the approval letter so I will sit and be impatiently waiting.
As far as I know we are still on orders to go to Germany in August so that in itself is a huge stress on my husband and I. Neither of us are really wanting to go , but you know... as the army says... Home is where we send you!
I am having trouble dealing with being so overweight and uncomfortable and even embarassed by how I look. Some days I am even ashamed to leave my home for fear of embarassment. I would like to be able to cross my legs, buy clothing that doesn't look like frump, sleep through the night and a million other things that overweight people want to do but are unable to accomplish because of the size of their body. It has got to be hard for someone who has never been overweight and can eat whatever they wish to grasp what I feel. I think other people who are on this journey can "get" what I am trying to say.
In the last two weeks I have had negative comments by inconsiderate people, flung in my direction. One was when I was riding my new bike ( which I try to do on a daily basis ) Someone leaned out their car and said " keep on peddling fatty"... that hurt so much! I used to be in the army myself and used to be really physically fit! The other comment was made by the people who live directly behind us. They were having a BBQ and yelled out to me and my husband (while looking directly at me) "at least I don't have a fat wife!" Do people have any idea what they do to someone when they say things like that? Anyways let me get off of my pity wagon... geesh!
So the letters have been sent, I am waiting to go to the seminar in Topeka next weekend, I am attending a WLS support meting today in the basement of Irwin from 2-4 and hope I can find a few good people there. I really need support. Thank you for listening to my rant and I will keep things posted.
Well, I can honestly say that I think the obesity help website logo is burned into my computer screen! I have read so much info from everyone in my area that is considering surgery and have already had their surgery done. It really is a big help in my quest. I went to the support group meeting that we were supposed to have here on post, but I assume because the lack of participation, the meetings are on sabatical. I was really disappointed about that. I just sat in the floor and waited for someone to show up and unlock the door. Oh well, I am still planning on going to the meeting that is the 10th of June in Topeka. I am sure that I will find some good support there and hopefully a few new friends. All of my friends have moved away (Thanks to the Army) and I've been pretty lonely.
I am hoping to hear something from Tricare and Tallgrass this week so keep your fingers crossed for me. Time is running out for me to get the surgery because we leave for Germany in August. I pray that I can get this done here before I go. I have heard that it is able to be done overseas but I would hate to have to go through all of this again. I keep every piece of paperwork pertaining to my surgery hoping that if it doesn't get done here that it will help me over there. Has anyone had their surgery done through Tricare overseas? I would love to know more info if you have.
I just got off of the phone with Tallgrass and even tricare approved my first initial consult with the surgeon, they refused to do it because I do not have enough time left here in the states. All I can say is that I am EXTREMELY disappointed. I have bawled my eyes out so far and am so frustrated to have to go through this process again once I get to Germany. I will not even attend the seminar that is offered in Topeka because I do not think it will do me any good. I have done research for months on this surgery and I feel like I know enough info to get me through. MY GOD I am so disappointed and sad. How am I going to get through the days now not knowing if I will be able to get this done? I'll write more later when I am not melting into a puddle on the floor.
Ok Yesterday was a whirlwind of disappointment and emotions. Man... it was a hard day to get through. I have better news for today though. I spoke to Tricare Europe and was told that referrals were not transferrable from the states over to there so I have to start the process all over when I get there. That is Ok with me. I was also told to keep any and all paperwork that I have acquired here to make the transition for approval even easier. I am hoping to be able to get DR Weiner for my surgery. He is located in Frankfurt and has had many positive reviews. I suppose all I can do is just keep my head up and keep on trying. At this point, failure is not an option for me. I have been SUPER stressed out about this whole ordeal and if you throw in the fact of having to move overseas very soon that just adds to it all. I am trying to work all of this out in my head and most of the time I don't know up from down but I am creeping through it all with a vague smile and a lot of optimisim. Keep your fingers crossed for me everyone!
Hi everyone! Things here are movng along smoothly with our move overseas. One little accomplishment after another. We have our transportation briefing next week. Moving overseas is really an interesting process and I am anxious about starting the weight loss process over there. I'm still very nervous about the whole thing, I have been reading a book on weight loss surgery and feel like I am getting more prepared. I have done many hours of research on websites and read many profiles and that seems to help a lot. I hope that the process doesn't hit too many bumps in the road when I get this process started. Keeping my head up is hard but I know that I will have a good outcome. Thank you all for your support and I will continue to keep updated on everything.
Hi everyone again! I have a little tip to provide for you all concerning leftovers in the fridge. DO NOT eat curried chicken after 3 days of being stored in the fridge! I had some leftovers the other day and about 4 hours after eating it... I saw most of it again and a lot of stomach juices followed all night. I think that food poisioning is a trip that has you close to death! I immediately felt extremely weak and hurt all over , it was terrible. The stomach cramps were enough to bring you to your knees not even to mention the pain of dry heaving many times and having to poo at the same time... ughh ... horrible! Watch out for all of your leftovers... after one day in the fridge... i think all should be thrown away.
As far as the weight loss surgery is going, i have heard nothing yet. I am subscribed to many weight loss surgery sites and haven't even been getting any info from them as far as postings go. I suppose I am in a rut now.
Ok Hi everyone... It's been a while since I have put anything up on here and I had a bunch of cute little graphics telling what dates I posted but they weren't working and I had to delete them. I don't remember what dates I posted earlier so I will remember to put them on here just in the regular format. Today is the 26 of August 2006 and we are packed up and ready for our move to Germany. I have all of my weight loss surgery paperwork and am ready to get it all started when we get there and get somewhat settled. This move has been incredibly stressful but its going so fast it just makes my head spin. Lately I have been getting skin infections around my bikini line and boy do they hurt! I think it is because of all the sweating and my fold doesn't get much air to begin with. God I hope things will clear up before our plane ride. I also hope that Germany isn't too hot over there either because we will not have air conditioning and just moving around a little bit gets me really overheated. Right now think I am getting a little more and more miserable as time goes on and I'm not really feeling depressed about being so overweight but more angry at the fact and aggraviated. I will try to get back on line and update after we get settled so keep your fingers crossed for me and say a little prayer that this will all work out for the best
December 21, 2006
Well we made it to Germany! Wow are things different here than in the states. I miss everything about home and can't wait to get back there soon. I think we are stuck here for the next 3 years though, bummer! I finally got around to making my appointment to see if I can get a consult with Dr. Weiner in Frankfort. My appointment is not until January the 9th so I will have to update afterwards to let you all know how things are going. I almost had myself talked out of the surgery and all because of my love/hate relationship with food. I panic when I think of not being able to eat a lot at one time. I think hopefully I can scratch this out of my head before everything gets rolling here with the surgery and all. I feel like I am getting bigger everyday. I probably will need a little professional help to deal with my food issues. Anyways....I will keep things updated on here as soon as I can. Keep all fingers crossed for me !
December 30, 2006
Well I had a minor setback again yesterday and boy I wasn't in the mood for any BS. I called the health clinic in Baumholder to see if my medical records had made it here from the states yet and they had not. So the search began to find out what happened. I called Fort Riley and they said that they had never received a request for our records and that they were still in Kansas. WONDERFUL! All I needed was my eyeglass prescription because my glasses are scratched badly and I need a new pair. Then I sat back and realized... all of my weight loss info was in there as well (DUH). I need my psych consult and all other paperwork involving my WLS and man ... I am so frustrated.
Since we moved I hadn't been pursuing the whole WLS issue. In fact I had almost talked myself out of it. The more I wait... the more I feel like instead of needing this just to look and feel better, I really need it to improve my daily life. I struggle to put on my shoes, take a bath and shave my legs, I huff and puff on any kind of incline and I grunt everytime I bend over to do something. The other day I dropped something in the floor of our car and I was unable to bend over and pick it up! Never mind the fact that my seatbelt was choking me. I find myself constantly pulling at my clothes because they are so uncomfortable. I am only 5 ft tall and weigh 227. So buying clothes for me is hard enough in itself being so short. Add all of the weight and you have pants that fit around the waist but are at least 8 inches too long. I carry most of my weight around my stomach and chest area which I know is not good. I haven't posted any measurements on here but I suppose I should.
Anyways I needed to vent and am realizing that I need to really keep up on this surgery thing. I'll keep ya posted on any progress. Wish me luck!
January 9, 2007
I made it through my initial appointment to get a referral for gastric bypass. I was nervous and sweating like crazy! The Dr. was nice and actually put in not only for a referral for gastric bypass but also one for a breast reduction. I have to wait a couple of days before I can find out on the status of the referral but I am hopeful that this will go through. I'm dancing around and can't wait for the next 2 days to go by. Wish me luck everyone and I am sure I will post as soon as I find out more info.
January 12, 2007
Hello everyone! Well I have some news to post... so here goes. I called my patient liasion yesterday to see how things were progressing on my submission of paperwork to go and see a surgeon. Mind you that this is just for a referral, I have not seen anyone yet about the actual surgery except for my primary care manager who said that I would be a good candidate. Anyways, the patient liasion said that they had sent the paperwork off yesterday and that since it was a 4 day weekend I wouldn't hear anything until the middle of next week. My PCM said that I would know within 2 days... aarrggg... how frustrating! I am trying my best to be patient but I am so ready for this. I bought a protein shake mix and went to the grocery store yesterday and bought a lot of food. All of which is really healthy I must add. Fruits and veggies and absolutely no soda, chips or really processed stuff like that. My husband says that he would like to lose weight too but he is already really thin to me. At least he was really supportive in that aspect. The thing that I have the hardest time with is eating after supper. Last night I had my ritualistic bowl of cereal before bedtime. I know that I need to cut out the incessant snacking but my head gets the best of my stomach sometimes. Well, when I actually have some news to post on here, I am sure I will do so. Keep on crossing all the body parts which can be crossed for me and prayers and the like would help out too I am sure. Thanks!
January 16, 2007
OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! I have a date for my first initial visit with a surgeon! I got the call today around 1:30. I was about to explode with happiness! I get to go and see Dr. Schultz at Landstuhl. I think that there was a coincidence because I received an e-mail from a lady who is going to have the surgery done by the same Dr. and I hope that we are able to keep in touch! Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers! Keep in mind that this is just the first step to a healthier life so I will be sure to let you know how things are progressing as soon as I know something!
January 17, 2007
I went in this morning to my patient laision's office and got my required paperwork to take with me to my Dr.'s appointment. I had to fill out a very small amount of information so that was really good. My medical records are still MIA. So... I had to go and put in another request for them because the clinic here had lost the paperwork and I hope that won't cause too many problems. My only hope is that this will go through OK and everything will start to fall into place. I had a pretty rough night sleeping though. I ended up migrating to the couch and resting there. Notice I said resting... not sleeping. Maybe the couch will seem bigger once I lose some weight, but last night I kept feeling like I was going to roll off of it! Besides, my blanket and I fought most of the night too. Oh well, I have been busy as a bee and right now I am just trying to fill my days with work of any sort to keep me occupied and the days going by faster.
January 18, 2007
Hello to everyone! I just added a ticker to my profile and i love the little orange car! This is what I weigh as of now pre-op. I am getting ready to post some of my measurements here so you all can have a better idea of where I am and also for me to keep track of everything. I am also going to try to put a ticker on here for all of my Dr.'s appointments so I can drive myself crazy!
I woke up this morning very tired. I'm not sure if I have sleep apnea but I am pretty sure I do. I always wake up with a headache (everyday) and my hubby says that sometimes when I sleep it sounds like I'm choking. (it doesn't help that my boobies are really large and they migrate towards my neck when I lay down!) Hopefully if everything goes OK with the weight loss this will releive itself in time. I'm not sure if I will be asked to do a sleep study or not. Since I am here in Germany, some of my paperwork that I have to give to the Dr. is in German. I was also given some that tells you how it is to have to stay in a host nation hospital. WOW! very different than the states I must add. Privacy is basically a no go! But hey...I'm willing to parade down the ward nekkid if I have to! LOL ( Ewww... bad vision there... it burns my eyes just thinking about it! ) Man! I need to get a german medical phrasebook! Most of the Dr.'s speak english very well but a lot of the nurses do not. OK here are my current measurements ....
Neck - 17 Chest - 51
Waist - 48.5 Lower ab - 51.5
Hips - 47
Right thigh - 21.75 Left thigh - 24.75
Left calf - 16.5 Right calf - 16.5
Left ankle - 9 Right ankle - 9
Left bicep - 14 Right bicep - 13.25
Left forearm - 11.75 Right forearm - 12
Left wrist - 7 Right wrist - 7
January 25, 2007
Hello Everyone again!
I am getting close to my first visit with my surgeon and boy...I am so nervous. I have really been trying hard to watch what I am eating and actually, not eating much! What in the heck is wrong with me? I lost 11 pounds in like a week. I didn't eat more than 800 calories a day but then I ate normally yesterday and I gained 8 of it back. What in the heck??? 8 pounds in one day? I was so bloated I looked like I was pregnant! Guaranteed... I did mix my protein shake with milk... and like a dummy... I'm lactose intolerant! So I pooted my way through last night (on the couch! LOL!) and actually lost 3 pounds when I weighed myself this morning. I HAVE to stay away from the milk, for the sake of my poor kids and hubby. LOL!
Anyways my DH is sick with a nasty cold. (another reason why I slept on the couch) My son has been pretty congested too so there has been a lot of Lysol and hand washing around here. I do not want to be sick for my first Dr.'s appointment. I have exchanged a few e-mails with another gal that has her appointment with the same Doc as me and I can't wait to tell her about my appointment. Hopefully I can help give her some info and relax her a bit. I know she is just as nervous as I am.
January, 29, 2007
I saw my surgeon today! He was very nice and seemed in no rush at all. He took his time with me and answered all of my questions. I was very nervous and German Dr.'s are a little different than the Dr.'s in the states but I felt really at ease. Now what happens is that I sit and twiddle my thumbs until I hear something from Tricare. I I also have some terrible chest congestion. I will post an update on here as soon as I know anything. Wish me luck!
January 31, 2007
Hellooo fellow OH people! **Cough** I hope everyone is doing well**Cough** Oh Man **Cough** Yup you guessed it **Cough** I got the families germs and am now sick with the lung funk. I thought I was going to make it through and **Cough** I suppose I was wrong. (clear throat here) Anyways it's too early to have heard anything about my surgery here. I got my Weight Loss for Dummies book and I think it's really great. **Cough** It came with a wonderful recipe book that details all recipes to weight loss surgery and the amounts along with how you are supposed to prepare it with every recipe. I plan on taking it with me to the support group meeting I want to attend on Feb. 8th. **Cough** I can't wait to hear from my friend on her appointment with Dr. Schultz tomorrow. I hope everything goes well for her. I suppose I should get off of here because I think the NyQuil is starting to work and I'm getting sleepy. I'm glad you all can't hear me talk because I sound like a frog! ~~Ribbit~~ **Cough** Gheesh! Until later!
I needed to update my ticker because Dr. Schultz recommended that I weigh less than I originally thought. I actually went on a crash diet for a week and lost 11 pounds but within 2 days I gained almost all of it back minus 2 pounds.
February 7, 2007
I HAVE A DATE! I received the call yesterday to let me know I'm approved. Today I have to go in and get all of my paperwork. I have an incredible flood of emotions running through me and most of them scare the crap outa me. But I'm also excited of the possibility that the future holds. Here is a ticker that I'm putting up so I can see how far away from surgery I am. (great... another thing to be neurotic about! LOL) Gotta run and get dressed to start my day. Oh yea, I want to thank all of the well-wishers. This website is truly full of wonderful people. Thank you for who ever had the idea of OH. It's a blessing.
February 12, 2006
Well, only 22 days until I begin a new chapter in my life. I attended a support group meeting last week and met my friend Shanon. Her surgery is this week so please think and pray for her. Also another one of the gals I met last week (Marie) is going in for her surgery today, please give her a moment of your time as well. I know that these gals are nervous as heck and need all of the thoughts and prayers they can get. Anyways, the support group meeting was a TON of fun. I haven't laughed as much as I did when I was with them in a long time. It was also really good to see other girls stationed overseas who have gone through the same thing we are about ready to. I'm looking forward to attending more meetings as soon as I know more dates. I may have to miss the next one because I will be in surgery but hey... that's a pretty good reason to not be there! I plan on visiting Shanon and Marie in the hospital this coming Friday. I think it will help getting to see a host-nation hospital and get a feel for the place. Also I will be able to see how my new friends are doing after their surgeries. I'm sure they will do wonderfully, they both are highly motivated. Thank you to Shanon for giving me the "heads up" on what to bring. She has already given me a couple of things that I wouldn't have thought about. Anyways, I know that my surgery is still a few weeks away but I am so afraid of forgetting something that I tend to worry about it way too much. Well I suppose that is all for now and thanks for listening to me blurb on for a while. I'm sure I will post more later!
February 25, 2007
Well, I think that I need to start posting things on my blog instead of under my story!I have been speaking to Shanon pretty regulary and she is doing great! I'm so proud of her! I only have 8 days until I am admitted into the hospital for pre-op testing and 9 more until I have my surgery. I think about this all of the time. Sometimes I'm really nervous and others I am just so laid back about it all. I will admit that I have been eating like a pig. All the junk food I can handle, which I know is NOT GOOD! I haven't stepped on the scale in about a week and am almost afraid to because I know that I have gained a few pounds.
I do have something I am proud of though! I actually hemmed a bunch of my pajamas myself because I am such a shortie, I end up walking on a lot of my PJ pants. Capris fit me like regular pants and sometimes long sleeves cover my hands. I bought some liquid stich and glued some of the hems but I like the iron on tape a lot better. It seems to be smoother and softer afterwards. I'm getting ready to throw the hemmed stuff in the washer and see how everything really turned out! I know that I really screwed up a pair of pants I had because I cut it crooked but I didn't really like those jammies anyways. I have my list ready and suppose I should start getting a few things ready to pack. Here in Germany it is not like the states where the hospital provides you with a few necessities. You have to bring everything with you. Towels, money (to turn the phone on) all personal cleansing items and jammies. The rooms are also not private and there are no seperating curtains to give you privacy from your roommate. There is one channel on the TV that is in english and that is CNN so I am bring my husbands laptop to keep me occupied. I have a CD of 500+ games on it and a few movies I will take to watch. When I went to visit Marie and Shanon, I got to look around a little bit and I will say that the hospital is nicer than I expected. The bathroom ROCKS and is very pretty. There is a shower in it but there is nothing from keeping the water off of the whole bathroom floor. There is just a drain in the floor right next to the toilet. It is covered with a shower curtain that you can close around you. I'm going to miss my hubby and kiddos while I'm there but I suppose I will need the peace and quiet to relax and focus on healing. I'm 100% OK with that.I will try to start my blog when I get back from surgery so until then I will put more info on here. (if I can remember to)
