Question:
The downside, what were your nightmares?
I've been having a tough time lately with trying to decide whether weight loss surgery is right for me. I'm not sure I would qualify, but really I'm just terrified of all the horrible side effects I keep reading about. Liver and Kidney damage? Gallbladder removal? Almost guaranteed need for plastic surgery? Chronic pain? ... Ok, I admit that the "chronic pain" part scared me the most. I have a close friend who has had gastric bypass, and she is doing amazing and is so upbeat that I am trying not to get "rose-colored glasses" about this because of her. From the "personal experiences" I've heard about, it seems like this surgery has been a real miracle to some....but a nightmare to others. I'm hoping that you all will be open with me and share with me your "nightmares". Be blunt...be honest...be real. Please share with me anything you think I should know...any important tips that you wish someone had told you about?? I do not know for sure if I am going to go through with the surgery, but I do know...as I'm sure many of you can identify with... I can't stand living in this "prison" any longer. Diets are SO hard to stick to when you weigh so much and your body is expecting to sustain that weight. I DO feel that I'm ready to go through a surgery in order to not be ABLE to eat the amount of food that my body craves now. I'm just terrified of all the complications that might come along with it. — Jenn K (posted on January 24, 2006)
January 24, 2006
Jenn, I totally understand your hesitations.. and concerns.. but alot of
this surgery is what you put into it, the surgery is just a tool, you have
to do the work and make the decisions to make the surgery work. I , too,
have heard nightmare stories, but I have heard far more good outcomes!! I
am about 10 weeks out, and feel wonderful. I have lost 55 pounds so far.
I am slowly losing every week, I have tried to be careful with food
choices and have added an exercise routine to my day, (which I thought
would never happen!!) and to my surprise, I am more energetic and feel just
great!! and am off all medications too!! I had a few episodes with some
foods, trying to eat too fast or not chew the food up properly, but again
this is another tool to help you lose the weight, eating smaller amounts
and slower.. I had my gall bladder out due to a gall stone, but it has not
affected me that I can tell. You really need to weigh your choices.. I
had to ask myself, do I want to continue the way that I was (267 lbs.) and
deal with the terrible back pain, joint pain, and newly diagnosed high
blood pressure and the possibility that I could even gain more weight,and
feel even worse.. because god knows I surely wasnt losing any weight, even
trying to diet.. I was afraid I would hit that 300lb mark and that scared
the hell out of me.. or my other choice was to take the chance to have the
surgery that would change my life forever, I will be forced to eat smaller
portions and less/no sugar, which alone makes a huge difference in your
diet. I have not been sorry.. not even for a minute!! Best wishes to you
on your decision!! April :)
— April
January 24, 2006
Read my profile, no nightmares for me! I am two years out, went from 252 to
139 (just started losing again). I think being a "lightweight"
helped a GREAT deal. Honestly, the hardest part has been my anemia, because
I have another blood problem taking iron doesn't work for me. This has been
a life long problem, but worse since I can't eat as much. I monitor it
every couple months and am doing well now. The other thing that I find
'odd' but certainly not horrible is that one day I can something and the
next day it doesn't agree with me. Usually I find that with meat. I have an
absolutely FLAT stomach, but I wasn't heavy there in the first place, and
no need for plastic surgery. I have a little jiggling in my thighs but
wearing a size 6 jeans makes it more than worth it! Best of luck! Angela
— Angela T.
January 24, 2006
It would be nice if folks could be honest about the bad side. Some people
have really suffered from wls... and the other people here are all over
them like "flies on poop". Kicking them all over for there
honesty. So don't expect it.
As for me, I had the Open RNY on 5-8-01. I've had 15 surgeries in my
life... it was the 3rd most painful one. Had I known, I'd got an abdomial
binder to wear post op... as my guts felt as if they would pour out
whenever I had to get up from a bed or chair. I also would NEVER have
another major surgery like this without having a private room! Read my
profile if you'd like to know why.
Any the first 3 months after wls are hard... after about 6 months I was
pretty much healed. It is difficult to learn to slow down while eating (I
still have'nt and suffer for it), learn what you can and can't eat without
pain. I could'nt eat chicken (other than KFC) for a year... same with bread
(then).
It rolled my pouch in a knot. I also learned NEVER, and I mean NEVER eat if
you are mad or upset about something. Talk about the pouch hurting then
while eating! Ouch! Anyway, wls is painful (open anyway) and the nausia and
learning process is hard. Some folks go for the LAP... and that's good in
one way... less pain and faster healing. Watch it, I'll get flamed for
telling you the truth... but there is some risk of nicking the bowel which
that. People have died from it.
There are both good and bad with the Open and Lap. You need to access which
is right for you, IF you want wls.
I knew several women in my small area who had wls. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM
GAINED, all, most or more of it back. NONE was successful. I cringe when
people come on this site and write "XXX pounds gone forever"!
Bull! We HAVE to be responsible to eat right, exercise and make positive
life changes. WLS is NOT a magic bullet. But for most of us, it has helped
us take our lives back. But wls is forever on this side of the grave or
rapture. It is very difficult to undo... and more dangerous too. So do you
research! Perhaps you can sit in on a gastric bypass support group.
There was a wonderful lady here a few years ago who had to be reversed. I
believe her name was Barb Henderson. She was treated very badly by alot of
folks here and especially when she had to be reversed..... anyway, met
other wls patients if you can... do your research. Be honest with
yourself... can you comply? Are you willing to comply? Everytime I hear
someone say we took "the easy way out" I'd like to deck them.
Surgery is not easy. Recovery is not easy.
Life long changes and relationship with food is not easy!
There is nothing about wls that is easy, in my opinion. I'm having some
other health problems that I think may be related to wls. Am I sorry I had
it? No. WLS gave me the ability to make some positive changes in my life...
so I roll with the consiquences the best I can.
Good luck to you!
— Danmark
January 24, 2006
Daniel, thank you so much for your answer. Admittedly, the "flies on
poop" but made me laugh, but I totally hear you. This is exactly what
I was hoping to hear and I appreciate it. Keep them coming!
— Jenn K
January 24, 2006
Hey Jenn. Your question is very valid, and every smart post-op has the
same feelings about not wanting or trusting "rose colored
glasses". You ought to visit the Regrets board, and the Revisions
board as well. There are many people there who have had complications;
some are managing them well, some aren't, and it's a place (usually) for
brutal honesty. You will get a better picture of the downside (for all
surgeries) on those boards than probably anywhere else.
http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/any_wls_regrets/
http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/failed_wls_second_time_around/
— Jeanie
January 24, 2006
Uh, that should read "every smart PRE-op". Duh. :)
— Jeanie
January 24, 2006
I some of the more minor complications and now that it has been 4months
since my surgery I am so glad I had it done. I get depressed alot more as
I still am not able to eat normally but most of the complications went away
fast. One of the complications I had was just after surgery when I woke up
in the recovery room was my hands and arms were numb. I am a crocheter and
this had me so upset that I vertually forgot the pain. They had a pump
that I was suppose to beable to push to get pain relief. I had no feeling
in my hands and fingers to beable to push the pumps button. I went for a
long time without pain relief because of my crabby nurses and the numbness.
Luckily the doctors nurses from his office came up and saw me and they
pushed the button for me. I had a horrible time with the nursing staff and
hope I never have to go through that again. The reason I had the numbness
in my hands was due to the position they had me in for the surgery. My
surgery ended up being 8hrs long instead of the normal 4 hour long surgery.
I had alot of damage in my abdomin from previous surgeries. Things had to
be repaired before he could see to accomplish the bypass. Most doctors
would have just opened me but he continued to do the procedure by
laparoscopy. I only have little marks that will eventually go away. That
extra time in surgery was my downfall. However within three days I had
most of the feeling back in my hands and my fingers were coming along. I
even was able to get a pair of booties made while I was hospitalized. The
crabby nurses were possibly unaware that someone could loose feeling for
that period of time. I had such pathetic care from them that on leaving
the hospital I reported them to the head nurse. I was also sent an
evaluation form from the hospital and I really told them off in that
evaluation. I was a nurse before I got to fat to do it anymore. I know
how a person should be treated. These nurses were horrible. I have to say
that my doctor has only done surgery at this hospital for abdominal bypass
for one year and possible that could be the reason for the pathetic way I
was treated. No one told me that it was possible to lose feeling in my
hands and no one told me I would have such patetic nursing care. I have
had more severe complications but they were short lived and quickly caught
by the doctor and taken care of. I don't have chronic pain and I feel
really good now that most of the beginning stuff is over with. I have lost
90lbs already and would do the surgery again in a heartbeat. The one thing
I didn't lack was a good support system with my husband. He was with me
and keeping my spirits high all the way through it. That is the trick to
this surgery a good support system. Keep your chin up and if it is meant
to be it will be. Good luck.
— vickicarson
January 24, 2006
The worst part of this for me is the pesky hypoglycemia. There I am,
minding my own business, having eaten/hydrated correctly when KABLAM, blood
sugar goes. I hate that part. However, aside from that (and explaining
why I did this in 1994 over & over & over), the other problems have
been minor in comparison. I forfeited my gallbladder at age 23, but we can
lose them to any diet, not just surgery. Chronic pain. That's what I had
pre-op. Usually I only offer to send 2+ yr post-ops to the Grad list, but
I'll hang the link here for you. You cannot speak, but you can read. It's
like looking into your future. The good, the bad and the glorious.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG
— vitalady
January 25, 2006
I think the reason why those who have regrets feel like those of us who had
great experiences get all over them is because you tend to hear those who
had negative experiences make comments that insinuate there is a silent
majority that rue the day they had wls. In fact, those who had such
negative experiences are in the minority, although it doesn't lessen their
pain, anger and regret in the least. I know of a couple of people who are
upset they had the surgery. Some have physical problems associated but
many of them have major psychological problems that are at the core of why
they are unhappy. Some people don't realize the emotional attachment they
have to food, so they mourn the loss of their friend and solace they used
to find there. Going through the psych test obviously doesn't weed
everyone out. I know of one girl locally who had major problems, but they
were brought on by her not following doctors orders on getting her protein
and vitamins in. She became deathly ill because she refused to comply with
these things. She is doing much better but she says it wasn't worth it to
go through this. So attitude has a MAJOR component here. If you are an
oppositional type of person who doesn't want anyone to tell you what to do,
(which I am not "getting" from your post) then you shouldn't have
the surgery. This is serious stuff and if you play by the rules you can be
extremely happy. That is not to say it's the only factor, but it is a
major one. As for the pain, well, it depends on the person and their
surgeon and their pain threshold. I had an open procedure and was cut from
stem to stern and literally had no pain. When I got out of the hospital I
was weak but did not need even a Tylenol. On my last day in Mexico (where
I had surgery), I slept funny and my shoulder hurt like hell, so that was
the first time I took any pain med after I got out of the hospital. I was
in the hospital only 2.5 days and went home 7 days later. So you can see
not everyone has a harrowing experience. Many of the people who saw my
surgeon were up and shopping around town just a couple days out of the
hospital...even with an open RNY. So we are all different and have
different challenges and benefits. The biggest key factor is to find a
great surgeon where the patients rave about how wonderful he is....and to
look at their complication rates. Then go from there. I would say that at
almost 2 years out and over 2 years of talking to others about this
surgery, probably 95% of the people I have spoken to have only one regret
and that is the they didn't do this sooner. No rose colored
glasses....just the truth. As for me, I was so worried I would feel
altered or like I had a "Franken-stomach." I was so worried
about not being "whole" and all that stuff. But I do not feel
that way. I feel so normal it's almost weird. I am lucky and have never
had to throw up, never get my food stuck (although I did get a vitamin
stuck once) and generally have had it easy. Even if I didn't have that
luck I would still do this again in a heartbeat. Being morbidly obese is
MUCH more difficult for me than dealing with issues associated with wls. I
was miserable....in a lot of pain and started withdrawing from the world.
I never wanted to go anywhere. This saved my life in so many ways I cannot
even begin to convey. As for those in chronic pain after wls, I'm not
sure what kind of pain you are referring to, but I don't think that's a
common problem. Some people do get strictures and have to have their
stomas dilated, and some people don't learn how to stop eating before they
have to throw up, but I don't know of what other chronic pain there would
be. I do know that my back hurts and I have degenerative disc disease, but
that was caused, I've been told, by years of being morbidly obese. I've
hurt for a long time, and my back is no worse than before...but it does
hurt. All that says is that this surgery can't get rid of every little
problem we have, but it sure can get rid of one of the biggest ones. So
I hope that helps you somewhat. You've gotten a lot of great responses.
And if you really want to know how people feel, go to ALL the message
boards and just read everything. You'll get the sense by that more than
anything. If you just focus on the regrets message board, you will see
nothing but negative and may come to believe a higher percentage of people
are unhappy than really are. So look at everything...regrets, surgery
dates, surgery types, state boards and the main board. Read what people
are saying and read their profiles. You'll soon get a good feel for what
to expect. As for me, I would have the surgery every single year if I had
to. It has been that big of an impact in my life. I am very happy....Dina
— Dinka Doo
January 25, 2006
Greetings,
This is the post I just placed o teh February and march boards to help
people get over the "I have been too informed" feeling.
I just wanted to let you all know of a secret I wish I had known before my
surgery. I spent so much time on this board that I was starting to get
freaked a bit.
I wish someone would have told me to visit the prior months posts to see
what was happeneing with those folks. You will see that so many people come
out of the surgery with no issues at all.
We all know that there are risks involved, but I would have been much more
confortable seeing the bazillions that had no gas pain, did not wake up
with a tube down their throat, had no issues and advised the pain was
minimal. To know that a lot of people actually had a pretty good expereince
was comforting. (I listed other helpful hints on my profile)
I was one of those people that came out with hardly a scratch and I just
wanted to encourage those that may be a little freaked to visit the January
or December posts for an encouraging piece of news. It may even help you
get prepared (grocery wise) on what to have handy for after surgery. You
will all learn and grow together. I am two weeks post op and my scars are
totally healed and I only had an issue with a twisted knee (from favoring
my legs instead of my stomach when getting out of bed after coming home.)
Getting out of bed and walking in the hospital was relatively simple. I did
not go home with a drain tube, I was not able to even come close to the
required intake of calories/food/protien/water for 4 days after my release
which is normal, but nobody told me.
I wish you all the best in your journey and pray that each one of you comes
out of surgery with flying colors and has a rapid recovery.
If this informaiton helps calm the fears of even one person I have
accomplished the reason for the post.
The more that you research the better it gets including the good stuff. Go
back months or even years to see the answers to your long term questions.
Just remember that everyone is different. http://www.theroadtothin.com is a
great site to read about some other things. The menu on the left side
should answer a lot of your questions as this lady has been through it and
takes advise from others that write to her.
Good luck and God Bless!
Kristie
285/260/150
— continuedmoon
January 25, 2006
With every type of surgery there is the "potential" for any type
of complication. I haven't had the surgery and I only personally know of
two people who have had the surgery -- one of which is my partner. She is
5'9 and weighed over 300 lbs (baby and ex-husband weight). The most
complications she had was eating too much or eating the wrong thing and her
body would immediately reject it (hurling or whatever the medical term is).
I've read some of the stories regarding peoples complications and yes they
are scary. I've even watched the Discovery channel about this woman who
weighed over 500 pounds, had the surgery, and had to go back into the
hospital at least twice before being able to keep anything down. I think
what the physicians missed is the metaphysical ramifications of the surgery
-- the body is used to getting the food it wants, now the stomach has been
reduced and the body is rebelling because it can't get the food it's been
fed for a number of years. The body doesn't want to adjust or conform.
Maybe this is why some insurance companies are requiring a supervised diet
-- to shrink the stomach and get the stomach used to less found prior to
the surgery.
— the7thdean
Click Here to Return