Question:
I am afraid to ask for time off work to have the surgery.

I just started this job last October, and I feel bad about have to take time off for doctor appts and the surgery. How do I approach it? I am okay with telling them what I am having, I think. But how do I do it, and how can I stop from feeling so bad about it?    — Erin Z. (posted on January 10, 2003)


January 10, 2003
Hi Erin, I am in a similar situation. I am pre-op, waiting for a surgery date. I just started this job in June 2002. And in December I decided to look into having the surgery. What I did was, made the first appt for the consult with the surgeon. Then I went to my boss, sat down with her and explained everything to her. That I would be needing to make appts for the preops and things. She was very understanding. I also told her I would work AROUND work as much as possible , such as evening or early morning or saturday appts when possible. I would take the earliest or latest appts I could get, and go into work late, or leave a little early. And I've kept her informed every step of the way, giving her as much notice as possible. I think most bosses will cooperate if you explain the whole deal up front. She is very excited for me. Try that approach, it may work. Good Luck to you. :-)
   — KellyJeanB

January 10, 2003
I don't know if you've started the process yet of actual appontments, tests etc., but I know the amount of time that took pushed back the date several months--so it won't seem so early on you are taking sick leave. I wouldn't say a thing until I have a confirmed surgery date--which for me was 6 months from first referral date, due to insurance, surgeon's shedule etc.. Good Luck
   — Wannabe A.

January 10, 2003
We obese folks tend to put other people's needs in front of our own. In my opinion, you have every right to take off time for medical reasons. Just make sure your company doesn't have a "waiting period" before they will enforce the FMLA law. As long as they have the same waiting period for all employees, they could potentially tell you that they won't hold your job. Check into this ... but if you're protected by FMLA, I say, "GO FOR IT!" If you're a good employee, your employer should be nothing but supportive.
   — Terissa R.

January 10, 2003
I know that in NY state FMLA goes into effect after 12 months on the job. I am only with my job 7 months. I have had very positive results with being open and honest with my employer. I don't feel that it's putting anyones needs ahead of my own. I need the surgery, I also NEED the job I have, so it was to my benefit to be upfront and honest about the whole thing, from the beginning. But, that's just my opinion.
   — KellyJeanB

January 11, 2003
I had my consultation May 8th, and surgery was December 26th, so there was quite a bit of time between starting the process to actually having the surgery. Your FMLA will likely kick in at 1 year at your job...maybe you could find out how long of a wait you are looking at with your surgeon, and go from there.
   — thekatinthehat

January 11, 2003
Hi Erin, In my opinion its none of their business why ypure taking off or what type of surgery ur having. If you have sick time then you sre entitled to use it to take care of your health issues but if you feel you must give an explanation just say you are having GI problems that require surgery. Good Luck
   — Lisa F.

January 11, 2003
Hello Erin, Iam trouble with time off with work as well, my WLS date is Jan 20. I was recently hired for this new Position in Oct 02, after losing my up mgment position, off work for 6mos being MOB my worse fears took over. My current employer (Iam a F&B Director for Native American Casino in Ca) was told piror to hiring and also so far have been supportive, but Iam hoping after two weeks to be at my desk, just fear being away will be grounds to terminate piror to my six mos probation. Donald
   — Donald W.

January 11, 2003
Yes, this is my third time responding to this.. LOL.. sorry. I just feel that people need to be upfront about things. OKay maybe not tell EVERYone what kind of surgery you are having, if you don't want to. However, your job absolutly has the right to know why you are taking time off, they have a business to run, and need to know they have reliable people working for them. And I think reliable means be letting them know that you are planning on taking time off, even if it's just to say for medical reasons. If she wants to keep her job, which she says is new, I think she should be honest with her boss and explain as much as she feels comfy with. As far as how long it takes to get a surgery date, every place is different. I got my first consultation date within 2 weeks (in Dec) and we are looking at Feb. or possibly beginning of March for a surgery date. Not every place takes 6 months. ::Tossing in my 2 cents::
   — KellyJeanB

January 11, 2003
I would suggest being upfront with them about why you need time off and the expected time off you will need. This will allow time to arrange coverage, etc while you are out. My employer was very supportive and excited about my surgery. They ended up with a healthier, more energetic employee. Best of luck.
   — GPoynor

January 11, 2003
Hi, I'm scheduled for a Lap RNY on 2/18/03. I told my immediate supervisors and principal, and all were supportive. We already have my coverage in place. I decided to do the surgery at the beginning of a school vacation week to minimize the time I will be away from school. I'm planning on 3 weeks total, actually missing 2 weeks of class time and salary. When I spoke to our human resources director about disability coverage, she told me to be sure the surgeon disables me as of the day my school vacation would be over so I get paid for the first week. I'll be w/o money for 1 week, then will get the disability check. Better than nothing I guess. Anyway, when I looked at the disability form, they want a reason that you are going to be disabled.I suppose they ultimately need to know, but I wonder if they have the right to say no dice if they think WLS is elective. I teach in a non public school, mostly women, and I tend to think whether appropriate or not, they are more sensitive to weight related issues.
   — Fixnmyself

January 11, 2003
I also agree that it is best to be upfront. I too teach and will be having mine on Feb. 18. It is OPEN so I will be gone 6 weeks. I actually discussed this with my principal in July and he said "Go for it." "We will support you all the way." They have be4en great abouit letting me off for any doctor appointment, test, etc. I've also had to take time off for hospitalizations for my mom who has been hospitalized quite a bit in the past year. Again, they are very supportive if they know why I am gone, and that it is not for some "dumb" reason. If employers value you, trust you not to abuse the sick leave, etc. they are more willing to work with you. Remember, you get more bees with honey than vinegar. I think that saying applies to honesty with your employer too. Best of luck to you as you make your decision.
   — Donna B.

January 11, 2003
I had an open RNY and was off from work 2 weeks (I have a desk job) and my surgeon wrote a letter to my supervisor stating that I was having surgery (unspecified). I told her Gallbladder and duodenal ulcer (they have to resect intestines which would explain the weight loss).
   — jengrz




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