pre-surgery jitters

Well I'm due to have my surgery on the 30th if I pass all the other medical tests this week. As the time gets closer I do a lot more thinking about it. Yesterday when I was at the grocery store I walked slowly down the aisles and paid more attention to all the good stuff I saw and I kept asking myself if I really was ready to give up all this. I was having some serious thoughts about that time. Then as I was walking to the car and realizing how tired I was, and how I hoped the pad I had on would make it until I got home from the leaking, well by the time I got to the car I was thinking again -yes I wanted to do this. Has anyone else done this flip flopping at the time so close to surgery? Or am I just a wimp

jitters? oh yes! my surgery is tomorrow. I watched my husband eat Popeyes Chicken today while I have been on clear liquids for two days. I sat and watched him drink a margarita while we were visiting with my brother and sister in-law. I just keep thinking nothing taste as good as a size (six, ten, twelve fill in the blank) feels. I have a close relationship with food too but I am ready for this, I miss way to much of life........

Terri... You've referred to that old Weigh****chers, Inc, motto...it goes like this: "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!" STILL remember that from when I did Weigh****chers years ago. Guess we'll all prove it true now, right? Kimmer Queen of the Niners, Instigator to All Marchers, High Priestess of Giggles

No - you're not a wimp. You're a realist! This first post I saw when I logged on here this a.m. was the news about Jewell. If THAT wasn't a slap in the face of reality. It scared the bejeebers out of me, but I'm certain, that for me, the risks of staying at this weight (and assumably gaining more and more each year) are far greater than the risks of the surgery. I'm going in tomorrow at 7:30. I feel very confident in my decision to do this and I'm fortunate that I have a great support structure here on AMOS and in my direct circle of friends and family. I'm going into this with a postive attitude, but am still being practical as well. I made sure my husband knows how I want things SHOULD I not make it out of the hospital. Morbid, yes, but I'm a planner, and I just get a feeling of control if I leave things tied up in a nice bow (so to speak). So - you're not a wimp. You are being human. Hang tough and make sure whatever your decision is, you are making it for YOU and no one else. Warm Regards! -Wendy Open VBG 03.15.04

I am scared to death about this surgery but I am doing it. I have been asked by family and friends if I have any second thoughts and I say no. If I backed out now I would be so angry at myself. We are strong and we can do this!!!! Cindy

I think we have all had thoughts about why are we doing this and then reality hits us again and again and again. We know why, and now it is time for us. So take a deep breath and we will see each other on the loosing side. Sugarplum Open RNY 3/16

Don't worry, you are textbook! It's not being a wimp to really "get" what a big deal this is and to test your own seriousness. For a while, I was crying every time I drove past a restaurant. I was like the little match girl, pressing her nose against the glass. I mourned the many things in my old life style I will never do again. Sure, I'll get a lot back but I also think we must acknowlegde that we ARE saying goodbye to a lot of stuff permanently. This is too big a deal to ever risk gaining the weight back. Try to focus on what you will put IN your life instead of what you will take out of it. No easy trick to do, by the way. But putting things in is fun. I ordered snorkeling gear for my trip to Hawaii last night!!!! I have bought some workbooks to re-engineer how I deal with rewarding myself. I don't mind disclosing that I am also in therapy with someone who specializes in eating disorders. I will stay there for support while I go through this change and until I'm sure I can make it stick. For me, I didn't think that just white knuckling it, even with the support of the surgery, would do the trick. Even if you don't go to those extremes, the support groups are so, so important. My hospital is doing a study with regard to their success rate and they're fairly sure that the support groups are an important key. (Sorry, Dr. Phil, other folks had keys long before you did.) I'm now two weeks post op. I have already thrown out half my medications on my surgeon's advice. I was 53 living like 83. Yesterday, I was able to walk about a mile down to the ocean. We bought a house on the ocean seven years ago because it has always been my dream (midwestern girl). That was seven years ago, yikes, and I was always "going" to start walking. Now I am doing it and, surprise, I see I live in one of the most beautiful spots on earth AND I CAN GET OUT AND ENJOY IT. Best of luck to you, Gano

Great post Gano. I'm so inspired to see new worlds opening for you. I admire your candidness in sharing about your therapy. You are so smart in doing this at the same time! You are right--this surgery will set up our bodies for success, but it will not fix our emotional problems. If we know we have emotional food issues, we would be wise to address them jointly. Some of us may not have thought we did, but discover that we do as this journey progresses. Again, seeking help is not a sign of defeat, but a move to victory. (I'm in the second category, getting therapy for some other issues, bu****ching for food issues to appear) It takes great strength to gather the help we need, and Marchers are STRONG! Joy -17 lbs/14 days

I agree. I have to admit, I did not know food was such an issue with me until I had this surgery. My mindset before this surgery was that it would be so easy to give up these foods afterwards but I was wrong. I now realize that I have a major issue with food. I miss it. I do think talking to someone is helpful. I have to try to think of new creative ways to entertain myself instead of food. However, day by day it is getting easier. I have determined to not have a bite of pizza, candy, cake, et****il I have my mind set on healthy foods. The occasional sweet will not hurt me (my surgeon even says to eat what I want on occasion) but I refuse to until I have my mind set on healthy foods. If I were to eat a piece of pizza now I would never want that healthy food again!! Bethany AKA Da Offishal Riddler and Bertha 13 Days into NewPouch and feeling great! -25 lbs!!!! Yayyyy A riddle a day will keep the Marchers pounds AWAY!