Need my OH friends righ now!!!

You are going through alot right now.  Even though your relationship was bad you are still grieving it.  I have been on anti depression medication for many years.  I will be on it the rest of my life. Their is nothing wrong with that.  My doctor explained it like this, "if you were a diabetic you would need medication so what is wrong with needing medication for your depression?"  I agree start with your PCP.  If that person is not  willing to help find someone else.  I would also suggest getting counseling.  You have a lot of issue to deal with because of the abuse.  I hope you fell better and good luck!

Oh be sure that you are eating as healthy as you can because that really helps!

Hi Willa,

Recognizing that things just aren't right is a huge step to getting the help you need.  That help might be just getting moral support from friends and your OH family, or it might mean talking things through with a therapist who can help you identify the root cause of your feelings, and if need be prescribe medications that can help you. 

I have gone into a deep funk before, about 2 years ago, and I could not see the way out.  Mine was all related to finances and we had hit rock bottom.  The way I handled it worked for me - but might not for you.  What I did was I gave myself reasons to be happy.  I took inventory of my life and the things that mattered to me and what I was greatful for.  Waking up and hearing my  daughters say "good morning Mommy", getting a snuggle, family that love me, etc.....   I counted the small things, and the big things.  Then I realized that I could not control the things that were making me sad and unhappy, and stressing about them was only hurting myself and by extension my children and family.  

You did a brave thing - breaking free from that relationship.  You are physically free, but now you have to give yourself the permission to be emotionally free too.  It will take time, but you have to believe in yourself and focus on the positive things in your life and the positive things you have gained since walking away.   The divorce will not be easy, even under the best of cir****tances, that is why it is very important to not go it alone.  Use your friends and family to help you,.

I wish you the best.

 

Good Morning Willa,

I am so sorry that you are going through all of this.  When I saw you on Sat you looked so good and so happy, goes to show that you are really good at hiding your real feelings.  As far as anti-depressants, take em, I have been on them for years, pre and post op and I need to take them everyday or some other woman shows up, and I don't even like her.

What Deanna wrote is excellent, count the good things in your life, because there is no control over the bad.  It happens to everyone at one time or another, and those that say it doesn't, they just don't live in the real world. 

You can call me anytime and talk to me.  I have dealth with depression since 1985, and there is never a day that doesn't be a challenge to get through.  You have taken a great big step by admitting to your problem. 
We are all here for you,

Love and hugs, Diane

I think people who suffer from depression are the best actors in the world! 

Hi Willa,

There were days I was so depressed, doing the smallest thing took huge amounts of energy. Depression is draining and it isn't something you can just snap out of. I've been on meds for awhile, but I also combined the meds with one on one therapy and have belonged to a support group for people with eating disorders (we're all compulsive overeaters) for around 9 years. I don't know if the meds alone would have been enough. I needed the meds to get me to a point where I would be willing to learn skills that would help me battle depression.

What's great about taking these steps is my depression isn't nearly as intense or overwhelming. I still get depressed over things that make sense to be depressed about, but I now talk to friends, bang out messages on this board or with my support group or remind myself what I am grateful for. I know it seems silly, but spending a minute writing down what's good in your life causes an attitude shift that helps deal with big feelings.

If you do go on a medication, make sure it's not a time released version of that med. We can't do time release meds anymore after RNY. 

Good luck!

MsBlues

Willa,

I am sorry to hear you are going through this right now, but props to you for addressing the issue and seeking the support of you OH family. 

As everyone has stated, please talk with your PCP and hopefully he/she can get you on some type of med.. Personally, I don't think I have depression, but I have always been a very moody person.  Several years back my PCP put me on Paxil (anti-depressant) to help with the mood swings and everyone who knows me well and myself like ME on the Paxil (my happy pill as I call it).  My daughter who is 19 was put on it as well a year ago.  Her dosage was even increased.  She and I are like 2 peas in a pod now and have to desire to kill each other any longer (Yay!)

After talking with your PCP try and get an appointment to see a therapist.  I am all for seeking the help you need to deal with what ever problems you may be experiencing.

As someone stated as well, take an inventory of your life.  I know only too well it is hard to put yourself ahead of your kids (and they are 2 beautiful girls) but I would start this way.

PRIORITIES:
1.  God (if you are a religious person)
2.  Me
3.  My kids

Now you can continue your list from here....

Trust in your family and friends to help you get through this outside of your doctors care.
Trust in God and the power of prayer  to help you seek the answers and guidance you so need right now.
Trust in yourself that you are strong enough to get the help needed to be the person you want to be.
Always know that I am here for you as well as your OH family to help support you.

Sending you much love, hugs, friendship and prayers to feeling much better.

Annette

Dear Willa,

Just know that you have friends here you care about you.  Please feel free to call me or pm me if you need to talk.

~Naomi

To all my OH friends,

THANK YOU< THANK YOU< THANK YOU!! All of your posts have really helped me alot. I have an appointment with the doctor tomorrow morning and am in the process of finding a theripist.

I appreciate all the posts and the wonderful information along with the support you all have shown. Thank you so very much!!

Willa

Hey Girl.

Sorry to hear that you are going through this.  I am glad to see that you are going to see your Doctor.  Divorce is difficult.  You have a lot of support here, don't be afraid to accept it!  You have my number if you ever want to talk.

I was on anti-depressants in the past and they helped my situation.  At that time I was only on them for about a year, but everyone is different. 

Hang in there.  you will soon see light at the end of the tunnel

Linda

((((((Willa)))))) I don't have any answers as far and depression meds go, but I just wanted to let you know that I/we are all here to support you. I will be going through a divorce as well. Sending you big, big hugs. XOXOXO