THE DRAMA AS OF LATE

OMFG this whole thing has been taken way out of proportion.  Geesh - those of you slamming others for making comments on the board are now doing the same thing.  I have to state here and noe that Rhonda is one of the kindest and most caring women I have ever met in my entire life.  Never EVER would she do anything to hurt anyone,.  I have tried to keep my comments off the boards about this whole bunch of crap but I just can't anymore.  I have to agree with what others have said and say lets just move on,  There was NEVER EVER any intention to hurt anyone.,  For those that felt hurt you took it the wrong way.  Ihave personally posted in the past things I did with friends that were not involved with OH in any way..was that wrong that I said that I had fun with friends......it doesn't matter who the friends are if we have a good time we should be able to write what we want. 

All of this crap going back and forth is just going to make matters worse.  How come so many of you feel its ok to write your opinion but are slamming Others for writing their feelings.

GET OVER IT....... YES those of us that went to the spa had a faboulous time.....it was never meant to hurt or insult anyone..,.and I apologize for making it public that I had fun.....holy moly.....

Ok I will quit now cause I am sure someone will attack me now.....

And like MOMO said the whole SECC thing was a fun thing for a bunch of friends...it was never meant to hurt and offend.  And Katt.....mean girls,..come on....I don't think so.

Jean I don't think the problem was that you all went out and had a good time.  I think that was great.  I think the problem was that SECC thing.  Some people were invited to it and others were deliberately left out and those that got left out and "booted" from it felt hurt.  It came across as a "secret society" that only certain people were allowed access too. It's like the sororities in high school.  You had to get invited to become a member and had to be popular to get into the club. And there is nothing wrong with you all making a space to meet and chat and do whatever online.  But the fact that it became known hurt those not included.  When people are hurt they aren't going to just go off in a corner and cry or disappear.  They are going to lash out at whomever they think caused the hurt.

There is nothing wrong with friends getting together.  There is nothing wrong with talking about having a good time with your friends here on the board.  I ask you to please put yourself in the position of those who feel they were left out.  Those that were not considered good enough to be allowed access to the group or the fun.

Is it childish?  Yes.  But hurt is hurt and when you are dealing with people who have dealt with obesity and the shame and humiliation that comes with it their entire lives, when they come to a place for support and alas friendship and then feel that same betrayal and are made to feel yet again that they aren't good enough to be included in the fun, that is hurtful.

That is why  personally, when I plan events that will  include OH people and there are those that I don't wish to spend time with, and I don't make them open invite events. I keep it off the board.  I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.  I don't want anyone to feel the pain of not being included.  Frankly, there are people on here I don't want to spend time with.  But I don't want to hurt their feelings either.  If we all remember that we have feelings and remember how we don't want our feelings hurt, then maybe we can remember to try not to hurt anyone else.  When I do spend time with OH folks at a private invite party, I don't and won't broadcast that.  I will simply say I had the best weekend with some great friends.  Then no one knows exactly what I've done other then I had a great time with great friends.

Hopefully this will all blow over soon and we can get on to the task at hand.  Helping people with their battles with obesity.  That is until the next time the sh*t hits the fan here.

Stephanie

I Understand what you are saying but the whole SECC was all in fun.....and I think people are to sensitive at time.....you don't have to explain the sensitivity thing to me as I was over 250lbs for most of my adult years.....ofcourse i understand but it was all taken the wrong way and taken out of context.  I know I personally am being made to feel like I can't post about good times aI have had with my friends.  So its ok to post if I have fun with friends as long as they are not OH friends....sounds like a double standard of sorts.  ]

]I just want all this crap over with....and I want to be here to support everyone.....that is why I continue to post about the LB/SO cal coffee gathering and hope that people continue to come .....I mean I don't want people to stop coming to coffee just becuase I am friends (and BFF friends to boot) with the SECC gals......big deal so we gave ourselves a name.....

Can't we all just get along.....

When you put enough people together with enough different personalities not everyone is going to be happy all of the time.  And it's not your job to make sure they are. We just all need to be sensitive to the feelings of others just like we do in the real world. Like we do with our families or friends who are not OH. I just wish we could all get past this and get on with having fun.  Fun on the board, fun with friends, fun with OH friends and giving and getting support when needed.  It really is all a terrible waste of energy and I think that is what I'm trying to get across with my posts.  Maybe not too well, but I am trying.

Dear Cali Friends, far and wide,

I respectfully request that for the sake of our wonderful Cali board that we remember that there are people on our board who...

- are dealing with life and death issues, not only themselves but their family members
- are going through personal crises, i.e., divorce, having lost a job, having lost a home, having lost a child, a parent or family member. 
- have family members are serving in the armed forces and cannot be home this holiday season
- without a close knit family and the Cali Board is more of a family unit to them
- have just had, will soon be having or are thinking about WLS and turn to this board for help, support and knowledge.

“We need to reach that happy stage of our development when differences and diversity are not seen as sources of division and distrust, but of strength and inspiration."

Josefa Iloilo

 

I quit coming here because of people with their secret clubs, secret rituals, secret hats, secret get togethers, secret pants and the overtly egotistical ME ME ME attitude. Personally, I found it exclusionary, sickening and insincere.  Turns out I was right.
 
This is not what support is all about, as far as I'm concerned.  I got tired of reading about certain people endlessly bragging about their wonderful, perfect lives and the mundane minutia of their days. How is that supposed to help the rest of us?  Is talking about yourself and your supposed wonderfulness supportive of us and our troubles?

If you supposedly follow the bible, like you claim, it sure doesn't show by your selfish, mean, clique-ish (not "click"), non-Christian behavior.  I thought THIS was the only group for us, now I learn of your SECC sub-group. How junior high school is that?  Are you getting even now because you were the unpopular, FAT girl back then?  Wow, you've really come a long way.  You're the popular girl now.  Lucky you!  You should be proud of yourself. Now, you're blocking others in your juvenile clique and taking away their admin privileges because they dare to cross you!  Are you frickin' serious?
 
My big girl panties are on, unfortunately, they always have been, and my eyes are WIDE open to who the REAL weasels are here.  I've seen you run other good people off this board with your behavior, too.  You might want to think about what you've done with the non-welcoming, exclusive, "members-only" environment you've created.

Don't expect to see me again, as I have found true support elsewhere and not here with the bloated egos.  I thought it was important for you to be called out on your hypocritical behavior, so there you have it.  I'm sure your God you praise daily would not approve of it, either.

Think about it.  

What is wrong with meeting a LARGE group of people and connecting with a few and then hanging out with just THEM.  I knew over 100 people in high school some of them STILL know my name and will speak.  I had 5 FRIENDS period and there is nothing wrong with connecting with FEW among the MANY!!

Getting upset because someone likes someone else and not you well that's about you and not the other people involved...