Relationship question?
Having WLS completely ruined mine, but I am not sad about it. I got to the point where I was done with him being lazy, and not caring about himself at all, and not caring if he lived to see our kids grow up. He was jealous that I was losing weight, but yet he made absolutely no effort to. He told me he liked me bigger, but would support me in whatever. Today, we are divorced, and he's with a skinny girl. Yet, he liked me bigger. Right. @@ I'm so glad he's gone.
~Kelly ~
SW 364/CW 164/GW 150
Ignoring the husband part - he'll deal or he won't. If you are doing this to be more attractive to your husband, to save your marriage, you're doing it for the wrong reason. This is about saving your life.
What I would like to comment on is the frequent self-righteous cries of indignation by the other surgery type patients, who have to eat low fat, low calorie diets in order to lose and to maintain their weight loss, that we DSers are "setting a bad example for our children." BULL****!!
If you have a child with food allergies, the other kids in the family and the parents don't have to limit their diets for the kid who does (with the possible exception of something like peanut allergies, where having the food in the environment could be dangerous to the exceptionally allergic kid). Ditto when one kid has type 1 diabetes, or a parent has type 2. EVERYONE has different dietary requirements, and one of our responsibilities as parents is to teach our kids to deal with THEIR bodies, and how to care for them.
My daughter, and then later and to a lesser extent and for a shorter period of time, my son, had lactose intolerance. They had to drink Lactaid. I bought two kinds of milk, and the kids knew the Lactaid was for them, and the regular milk was for me. I couldn't (and still can't) stand the taste of Lactaid (it is too sweet), and I didn't have to drink it - so I bought both. (I am now somewhat lactose intolerant myself, but still drink a little regular milk for when I want milk (e.g., in my Raisin Bran that I sometimes eat at night) - and order soy milk at Starbucks.) They understood why they couldn't drink my milk, and they learned to deal with their own particular needs.
When you are eating high fat, high protein, you are going to explain to them that eating those foods is what YOUR body requires, and that it isn't good for them to eat that way. Obviously, you are not going to cook entire meals they can't enjoy, but you are going to perhaps add more butter to your veggies, or mayo to your tuna salad, or eat cheese as a snack. When they eat sandwiches, you are NOT going to eat the bread, just the insides, or you are going to eat something else. They need to understand why THEY can eat some bread, and you can't, or won't. It is part of their education, and it is important that they learn this important lesson as one of those things that everyone needs to know and cope with.
So, ignore those whiners on the main board who will try to tell you that you will be setting a bad example for your kids - you will be setting a GOOD example of how to take good care of YOU.
What I would like to comment on is the frequent self-righteous cries of indignation by the other surgery type patients, who have to eat low fat, low calorie diets in order to lose and to maintain their weight loss, that we DSers are "setting a bad example for our children." BULL****!!
If you have a child with food allergies, the other kids in the family and the parents don't have to limit their diets for the kid who does (with the possible exception of something like peanut allergies, where having the food in the environment could be dangerous to the exceptionally allergic kid). Ditto when one kid has type 1 diabetes, or a parent has type 2. EVERYONE has different dietary requirements, and one of our responsibilities as parents is to teach our kids to deal with THEIR bodies, and how to care for them.
My daughter, and then later and to a lesser extent and for a shorter period of time, my son, had lactose intolerance. They had to drink Lactaid. I bought two kinds of milk, and the kids knew the Lactaid was for them, and the regular milk was for me. I couldn't (and still can't) stand the taste of Lactaid (it is too sweet), and I didn't have to drink it - so I bought both. (I am now somewhat lactose intolerant myself, but still drink a little regular milk for when I want milk (e.g., in my Raisin Bran that I sometimes eat at night) - and order soy milk at Starbucks.) They understood why they couldn't drink my milk, and they learned to deal with their own particular needs.
When you are eating high fat, high protein, you are going to explain to them that eating those foods is what YOUR body requires, and that it isn't good for them to eat that way. Obviously, you are not going to cook entire meals they can't enjoy, but you are going to perhaps add more butter to your veggies, or mayo to your tuna salad, or eat cheese as a snack. When they eat sandwiches, you are NOT going to eat the bread, just the insides, or you are going to eat something else. They need to understand why THEY can eat some bread, and you can't, or won't. It is part of their education, and it is important that they learn this important lesson as one of those things that everyone needs to know and cope with.
So, ignore those whiners on the main board who will try to tell you that you will be setting a bad example for your kids - you will be setting a GOOD example of how to take good care of YOU.
I'm married 26 years, through the whole post-wls cycle, plastics, revision, etc. The marriage is great, strong and unconventional, but that's what keeps it interesting, haha. He married me when I was a size 16-18, stuck with me up to 26/28, and is with me now.
My husband is tall & thin. Our son is tall & thin, our daughter tends towards being thick but she's not fat. The only bad example I set for her was by puking after every meal post-rny. I didn't want her to think that was normal, and that was a major catalyst for my revision.
The family eats normally. They might get a bit more fat than their contemporaries, but for hundreds of years people ate fat and didn't gain weight. I don't think fat makes people fat, it's the carbs. That's why a low carb diet works.
My husband is tall & thin. Our son is tall & thin, our daughter tends towards being thick but she's not fat. The only bad example I set for her was by puking after every meal post-rny. I didn't want her to think that was normal, and that was a major catalyst for my revision.
The family eats normally. They might get a bit more fat than their contemporaries, but for hundreds of years people ate fat and didn't gain weight. I don't think fat makes people fat, it's the carbs. That's why a low carb diet works.
My husband and I have been together for 18 years now, I had surgery in 08. I am not sure if the surgery changed our relationship, we had a really good relationship to start with however our marriage has gotten a LOT better since I lost weight. At first he did admit he was a little worried because he did notice men "checking me out" but it motivated him to lose weight too. All in all I would say that it was a great thing for us!
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