AHA-Porthole to Destruction

It has been awhile since I posted feeling/thoughts.....Went to a support meeting last night. For those who know me I go to many a month.  At every one I go to I walk away with any aha moment.  And last night was no exception. It was such a good one that I thought I would share!

At the meeting I was discussing with the group that I wish I could keep my head in the game "ALL THE TIME". Never go "off program"  To never cheat.  Not to allow triggers into my life.  We batted ideas around about what is "program".  We discussed that real life will always step in. Then the  aha  came when one of the lady's asked me about my DH  who is a skinny man.  He never weights more then 160. ( I know we hate him)  I realize that even my skinny DH has his days were he eats more and then the next meal or the next day he is back to his old "I could care less about food" person. (we hate him even more)   We/I need to get that philosophy!!  We/I need to stop the beating of ourselves up.  Why can't we we have that one piece of cake/cookie or what ever we/I consider off program and enjoy it.  Not make it the porthole to destruction!!!  That is what we need to learn.  It leader said to us "Maybe right now you want that what ever.  But allowing that thing you/I consider "bad" ruin a whole day of being "good" is what sets us up to justifying our old "fat head" back into our lives.  First and foremost we need to figure out what it is we want/crave.   We can't be eating willy nilly.  Is it  chewy/gooey, salt/sweet or just plan sweet.  We need to  figure how to satisfy that feeling with out causing too much collateral damage!!! One serving size of something is not going to make us gain back all of our weight.  Or any for that matter.  It is the whole bag, box, pie and container that does us in"!!!   AHA -- DON'T CONSIDER THE ONE SERVING SIZE A BAD THING AS LONG AS IT IS ONE!!!  TRY TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS YOU ARE CRAVING AND DO NOT EAT WILLY NILLY!!! So now I will try to incorporate the "if I want that I have to make it part of my day.  It is not a cheat and because I had that I have to make the next meal "cheat free" :-)

 Here is something I eat sometimes when I want the salt/sweet, I have apple slice with salt sprinkled on them.  OMG is that good.  I love it.

What do you do to deal with the "off program" syndrome?

Great Aha moment and soooo true!  It's finding that stopping point that separates us from the average weight person.  One bite, one piece, one serving if fine, but if you can't stop...that's the difference between obesity and the weight we desire.

It takes practice, but it's possible to change.

We CAN!

Thanks Butterfly!

Lisa O.

Lisa, you seem to have done the hard work and really practiced this.  You are a success!!!  Thank you for responding.  I am glad you enjoyed my thoughts :-)

Thanks for the good thoughts. Karen

Karen, Thank you!!!

Apple slices with salt sprinkled on them?  OMG Butterfly, I'm so sorry but I that is one of the yuckiest things I have heard to do!  But then I have never heard of doing this and I am glad that it works for you.  I should try it....  um, maybe not so much.  ; )

I totally agree with you on your AHA! That is pretty much how I live.  If I want it - I eat it - but just a small portion.

Good luck on your journey!

I thought is was pritty yuckie mself until a friends who was eating it gave me a slice.  OMG the apple was sweet and the salt is salt.  It is like chocolate and popcorn or potato chips together.  When I have TOM I crave salty sweet and this does the trick.  Give it a try if you crave salty sweet.  

Thanks for the encouragement.  Your doing great!!! Keep up the good work.  I am coming up right behind you.

It sounds like you guys had a great discussion!

 Personally, I find the "Program" of constantly weighing and measuring and counting calories for the rest of my life very daunting and tedious. I do not know one normal weight person that does this, however I do understand that as a very obese person for so many years, I have a larger than life view of what constitues a portion size.  So, for right now weighing, counting and measuring helps me to learn normal portion sizes and I'm more than happy to do it so that I can learn a better way of eating.

I really think part of the reason we have weight problems is because we are in an all or nothing mindset. If we have one meal that is a splurge or a dessert, we think, "oh great, I've been "bad" or went off plan or program -- what ever you like to call it and then we eat even more. Perhaps this starts on a Friday, and we think we've already spoiled the weekend with bad eating, so we continue, promising ourselve to eat better on Monday.  Monday comes and then we have a donught at the office and there goes the week.

It's interesting to note that naturally thin people do NOT live like this. I have several of them in my family and am married to one and their view of food is so different!  My tiny petiet little sister will stand a candy counter and scarf down 3 huge chocolate carmel pecan turtles right in front of God and everybody and make herself sick with all that suger just because she wants some right then.... but.... she doesn't feel one bit guilty AND most importantly, she doesn't do it but once or twice a year and she doesn't let it turn into making bad choices the next day.

Trixie

You said it so much better then I did.  I agree with you about allowing that one thing being the beginning of a out of control eating frenzy and the Monday promises.

It sounds like you have a great support system.

I truly believe that I am 'wired' differently from people like your husband.

I cannot eat 1 serving of certain foods without those foods creeping into my thoughts and life.

I know that those people exist --- but I am not one of them.
It has taken me a very long time to figure out that there are foods that I cannot have ANY of because 'one is too many because enough is never enough'.

One serving of some foods will never be one serving to me --- and honestly, I am not willing to 'test' that out --- I would rather have none than risk getting back into the game of thinking that I can control those foods ---- because I really believe that they control me.