Sabatoging myself?

I am in a bind... I had some family get togethers this weekend and fell back in the habit of eating what I wanted, HOWEVER, I didn't eat ALL I used to, one small serving of stuff and one small slice of cake (it used to be at least  4 pieces of cake in one sitting, NO kidding!), and since it was a last minute trip we stopped at mcd's (that is my addiction :(  .  I have my final weigh in next wednesday and I am so afraid that I will have gained. I was at 277, which is what I need to be by then.... I haven't gotten to the gym today or yesterday to weigh myself, (their scales are the only ones that are in sync with the drs office scales.)

I feel like I am sabatoging myself....I know that I need to do this and to do that, but what motivation can I use to get my a$$ in gear? 

I have tried the old pics, the health reasons, the "better sex" reasons, the for me and no one else reasons.... I just can't get it in gear. 

People all weekend asked if I am scared, I say No, because I am not, (not yet anyhow).  I am wondering if I am NOT scared because I know I am sabatoging myself.....

Why am I seeing this as a HUGE deal?  And am I making it more complicated than it needs to be? 

Today was a Bang-a-rang day, good small lunch and so far I have in at least 4 glasses of water :)

♥
chris

Chris, you probably didn't intend to sabotauge youself but you let others around you influence you into falling back into an old habit.  The bright spot is you jumped back on the wagon and have gone back to what you need to be doing.  McD's is not a good place for anyone to eat and if you need something fast food, at least do Wendy's chili which is full of protein.  Wendy's turkey & cheese sandwich (junior) is also good.  Ixnay on the cake too.  Once you have your surgery, if you're doing RNY, you will probably dump which will make you feel really horrible and hopefully you won't do that again.  If you don't dump then you'll have to be ever watchful about what you do eat.  I might suggest that you log into Fitday.com and keep a food diary starting now and keep it up after the surgery.  Check your calories and keep under 30 grams of fat a day starting now and keep doing it.  I am 27 months out and have lost 153 pounds just following the program.  Does this mean I don't have treats?  Heck no, but I don't have them often and I do account for them in my food log so that I stay accountable to myself.

Also, if you haven't gone to a support group meeting, find one in your area and attend every meeting you can.  Everything you learn there before and after surgery will help you accomplish your goals with the new tool you are given.

Good luck to you and I'll see you on the loser's bench in 2 weeks.

Stop beating yourself up. If we were able to eat in moderation and nutritiously at every meal, none of us would need surgery in the first place.  Stat over again, like you have done a thousand times, and know that once surgery is complete, you will be able to have some internal control over diet that you haven't been able to maintain up until now.   Be nice to yourself, forgive and move forward.

Just the fact that you are aware of your behavior is a good sign.  Also, confessing it here for the world to read is also a great thing. 

You are going to do great!

Jenn

Hi-ya, Chirs!
Don't beat yourself up!!  I was a good patient prior to surgery.  No last suppers - NOT A ONE.  Had I knew then what I know now.... and I am not telling you to go have a free for all.... I would have splurged once or twice.

I am one of the odd balls who has a difficult  time eating solid protein.  Just the thought of eating dense meat gives me the heebie-jeebies.  But I keep trying and I know some day it will be all good.  Plus - I think it is a good thing for me.  Sometimes I forget and eat a bit too fast or something.  I am a little slower at making habits I guess.

And hey - like you said.  You had 1 piece of cake, not 4.  So pick yourself up by your boot straps, dust your bum off and let it go.  Your new life is only a few days away!!

Good luck to you!!