Cheat Days?

Yeah...this is tricky...we are all different and what works for one may not work for others. I have to say, I am with Rob on this one. I want to make this change for life and I know if I have a day off it will feel to me like I am in a diet the rest of the time...which I am not. I don't feel like I am on a diet. Because diets are temporary but this sleeve life is for life. I eat great food, in small quantities and so far all good choices. That is how I want to live now so I don't want a day off from my life...

I honestly do not have "cheat" days but I do have "off plan" days. I am a binge eater (like most of us) and I know how my prior "diet" days failed because I refused to allow myself to eat X (insert your down fall here).

I do allow myself "off plan" days, usually once ever couple of weeks or so. If there is something I am craving, then I have it on a planned day. I have done this since about 4 months post op and I am quickly approaching my 3 year anniversary.

I am not recommending my "plan", I'm just sharing how it has worked for me. Ultimately the decision is up to you as to what you eat, YOU are in control.

If you try the "cheat" day and find you are out of control due to the carb crazies then you might not want to do it. If you find you can control the carb crazies and not binge eat for days, then it's totally up to you!!

I don't have cheat days. :)

I have a plan. That plan may involve an extra 200 calories and 100 carbs that day or whatever, but I try to stick with my plan. I don't do it often but when I do I'm good about getting back on the horse. I really don't eat pasta bread or rice post op. It expands in my stomach and doesn't feel good. It also triggers the hell out of me. I'll have a little crusty bread now and then, but only if that's my plan.

Here's the thing. It depends on you. I've lost 191 pounds in 16 months. I'm in this for the long haul. Add in the fact that I'm a girl and didn't start therapy until the month before surgery to deal with the reason I got up to 375 pounds in the first place, then yeah. I've got a lot of **** going on. I'm just coming off of what I call a "maintenance schedule" again, but I'll explain that in a minute.

For ME, my plan is 800 calories per day for 13 days and then 1200 for 1 day. That is my plan. If I know it's my kid's birthday or something then I make sure my 1200 day falls on that because I'm going to have a small piece of cake with him. Otherwise, I'm pretty much like the rest of the folks here. I stick to 80+ protein, 600-800 calories, lots of freaking water, 40 carbs and all that extreme stuff. Because, for me, it works long term. Yes. I still do this at 16+ months out.

Now... maintenance periods. I know a lot of folks don't think I should be doing this, but it's a mental health break for me. I didn't get fat because I was hungry. I got fat because I had a sucktastic abusive childhood and was taught that food is love and comfort. That's MY story. When we start hitting stuff in therapy that gets hard and I know I'm going to start making bad choices, I can feel it and I know it, so I spend a week at 1000-1300 calories. I usually don't lose that week, but I also don't lose my mind. It's what *I* have to do. It's called being self-aware. Hell, I'm not stuffing my face with Hershey bars so that's a good thing and it's gotten me through 191 pounds, so...

Where am I going with this? Do what works for you. BUT DO NOT call it a cheat day. You aren't cheating. Find a plan and stick to that plan. Don't fool yourself into thinking you're doing something "wrong" when it comes to your eating.

I won't tell you I'm perfect. I'm actually coming off of a really tough emotional meltdown right now that left me eating a bunch of crap I shouldn't have. I didn't gain because I had the self-awareness around it and did damage control.

You're also a guy, right? Frankly, you'll lose faster and probably sail through easier. BUT just don't lie to yourself and don't "cheat" yourself. Find your plan, whether it's to get it off as quickly as possible or to find a longer term solution. And remember... not everyone is the same. I lose at a different rate than some, but I'm still averaging more than 10 pounds per month, overall. If you're starting at 230 pounds, you're going to lose slower than someone that starts at 400. But no matter what, the vast majority of us not only struggle with getting those last pounds off, but also with battling our own minds. That's where the real work is.

Okay, that was oversharing and probably didn't help, but I'm just throwing out there what works (and doesn't work) for ME. This is an individual journey. ((HUGS))

Edit: My biggest advice. Journal your food. Get MyFitnessPal or something like that and put it in there before you put it in your mouth. I can add stuff from my computer or from my phone app. It's eye-opening :)

your sucktastic childhood obviously spared your mind, wisdom, and heart!

Thank you! That's probably one of the nicest things anyone has said to me. I appreciate the love. Honestly, my mother and husband get the credit for getting me through those dark years after high school when I finally moved out and was a "real adult" (whatever that means, I'm 37 and keep thinking they're going to revoke my adulthood at ANY moment LOL)

Peeling the layers back is a daily battle (as I am learning rapidly) . It is so helpful to have a spouse that has your back. My husband and I have been life coaching each other through our sucktastic child hood wounds for 22 years.

What you say always speaks to me so thank YOU, your input helps my journey.

Thank you. I've been helped by MANY here myself. I think it's hard to admit that you had issues and it contriubuted to your weight, that's been the hardest part - being honest about the WHY. It's a very private thing and something we don't like to talk about as adults, but I think in some ways it makes it "okay" too. My kids have recently begun to ask questions about their grandfather (my father). That's hard, but I've been completely honest with them - not only about who he was (is, I suppose) but why they've never met him, never will meet him and why I go to therapy because of it.

Totally hijacking this guy's thread, but I think part of that is healing for me, in some odd way because abuse is "secret" and you're not supposed to tell anyone. It's freeing, in some screwed up way, to be able to say "yes this happened"

I'm one month out and can't even get in all the protein and water I need as I move into the solid food stage. Even the thought of food makes me a little nauseous so it's hard for me to imagine a day off plan.

I'm afraid I'm another that doesn't care for the term cheat day, because for ME it would very quickly turn into an "eat ALL the junk!" day. I know me. It WOULD happen. You might be able to handle it. I know I couldn't.

That said, I eat very small portions of whole grains every day and a small amount of fruit (1/2 an orange or apple, a few grapes, a slice of melon) a couple of times a week. I eat legumes most days. I add All Bran to my yogurt. These are things that don't trigger ME, but might be a problem for somebody else. (I also stay under 800 calories and get all of my protein in - EVERY day)

If that's what you mean by cheating, I'd try doing it as long as it doesn't cause you problems, make sure you get in your protein (shake?) and move on. I'd rename it though. Just the word cheat makes me twitch.

There is no reason for a cheat day.  I don't need or want junky food in my body anymore period.  The whole concept that you are "cheating" on something goes back to the whole diet mentality which is not what WLS is about.

 

I deal with the head games as much as the next person here.....but I also am at a point where I get just as much enjoyment from a nice piece of steak or sauteed veggies as I did from a piece of cake. 

The wrong types of carbs make me feel like complete crap now....I don't feel there is any reason to cycle them into the nutritious food I am eating now.