Balance between the losing phase and living your life.

You can always look up the menu online b4 you go. When you're going on a trip, find out the restaurants in the area and look at the menu and eat where you can. Don't think of it as punishment, think of it at punishment, think of it as a lifestyle change. You can do this! Don't think about the can'ts and think about the cans!

Just like wildcat said, one bad meal or one bad day will not derail your weight loss unless you let it. Deviating from your plan by 100 or 200 calories once in a while may even be beneficial.  Low carb and low fat is torturous.  More fat grams will not effect your weight loss like more carbs will.

You are doing great, don't beat yourself up and learn to roll with the punches.  Expecting perfection from yourself is a sure way to fail because you can never achieve that.

Good luck, you will make it...just relax..a little

I feel your pain this week! My daughter got married over the weekend. We chose chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans that I could eat. Problem was the way the items were prepared. I ate some wedding cake also. It was a small slice but it was still sugar. I did well today but I know the scale will show my indulgences. I am back on track today but the entire weekend was a BUST! I know the bad stuff goes down easy. I will chalk this up as a learning experience and go on from here. I have lost 54 pounds and I have 49 to go. I will get there.

On top of the eating glitch, I wore heals for the first time in YEARS and now my ankle is swelled up so I can not get out and walk. I'm going to stay positive though. I'm icing at night and I WILL get out for a walk later in the week. I did notice my food choices caused some gastrointestinal issues as well. Live and learn and take time to choose as wisely as possible when going out to a restuarant. You'll be fine. Don't beat yourself up. Get back to it and learn from your experience.

Thanks, all, for trying to help.  I'm going to have to process for a while.  I'm already doing a lot of what you suggest--I looked at menus before we went (hence the smoked salmon and turkey burger), I took food on the trip, etc. 

I think the real problem is that there is so little wiggle room in my plan I don't think it is possible to eat things I don't prepare and stay within it.  SO, I'm going to either have to decide that I'll make good choices even though my numbers will be over what the plan says, OR I'm going to have to just eat my own food even if that means I stay at the hotel while my family eats.  I just can't see myself going into the types of places we went this weekend with a Tupperware container of tuna salad.

The best solution may be a hybrid--I take what I'm having for breakfast and lunch and allow myself a splurge at dinner, maybe not counting fat grams (well, they will be counted in mfp, but not being so strict with them) on those days.  I find it relatively easy to stay within the carb limits when I do what I SHOULD do.

I also just need to not bring snacks for my kids that will tempt me.  They can have fruit and granola bars.  Anything you can pick up just one of (like nuts, trail mix, chips, etc.) is just too easy for me to mindlessly take one of.  They barely ate the trail mix THEY picked out anyhow.

As for it not feeling like a punishment--well, I'll have to work on that.  It doesn't feel like a punishment when I eat the awesome chicken thighs with artichoke and feta I made last week that fit into my plan.  It just feels like a punishment when I'm at a restaurant and am choosing what I eat based on what has the highest protein with the fewest carbs and fat grams and it tastes awful.  It is possible that anything I got from the 2nd restaurant would have been sub-par.  Hubby said his Reuben didn't have much flavor.  I don't know how you do that with a sandwich that has sauerkraut on it. . .

I understand! Trust me! lol My tastes have seriously changed. There's still a lot that you CAN eat. Don't make yourself miserable by sitting at a hotel while everyone eats! That's just nuts! Honestly my MFP plan has me at 800 calories max, 20-40 carbs max, and a goal of 90 grams of protein. I'm losing at a pretty good rate. Like I said, if you stay on track with something like that, you will do just fine. You'd be amazed at how many options there are when you tweak your plan just a little. I'm not saying go absolutely nuts and eat whatever you want, but you get the idea. You can do it!

I'm not going to exactly tackle the restaurant issue - it's as easy or as hard as you make it - I've always found my protein and avoid the bread basket.  But I can't help but comment on what I read between the lines...It just makes me sad how much you are beating yourself up.  I guess I have a very different life and outlook. 

I'm single and am constantly out with friends, co-workers, strangers at different restaurants and I have had a LOT of travel in the last 5 months - which has been hard, but not unsurvivable (new word).  There is always a high protein option - I order carefully and I would never bring my own food into a restaurant- where I live it would be unacceptable and I would not out myself as having had surgery in order to do it - they would NOT understand.   Also, it's just not sustainable.

Have I cut back on how much I go out?  Absolutely. 

Have I traveled about 5 times since my surgery 5 months ago?  Yup. (Three of them were for a week at a time.) 

Was I able to control every food/drinking situation I was in? Nope. Especially not when entertaining clients! 

Did I manage to eat as much protein and as close to plan as I could?   Yes.

Did I beat myself up?  I tried not too, did it happen sometimes, yes...but there is only so much I can control.

Did I get back on track as soon as I was finished with the situation that put me out of my plan/program/control/comfort zone?  YES.

I guess I'm sad about how you MUST only eat 600 calories and 20 carbs and 20 fat.  So many people on here are militant about their program - but most people have an acceptable range - some room for adjustments and error.  Why?  Because we are human.  There will be good days and bad days and this needs to be sustainable long term...

You counted a Pringle, a peanut and one other item - one of each - and you went over your carbs for the day and  feel busted?  Give yourself a break.  You've lost over 60 pounds - I know that's not half way to your goal, but you've come far and you are so focused you will achieve your goal.  There will be slip ups and hard situations along the way...but you'll bounce back.  

I understand the slippery slope...this is coming from someone who has been on the slope for a long time and struggled with weight issues her entire life (like most on here) and an eating disorder (not something I usually disclose)...when I see posts about people being so hard on themselves it just kills me...

 

Excellent response.

I just came back from a week long training in Phoenix.  Here I was with a group of new co-workers who have no idea that I had WLS.  Breakfast is always the easiest meal and the company paid for the buffet - I got the scrambled eggs and the turkey sausage... no body really paid attention to how little I ate.  At lunch we had the cafeteria with a salad bar and I managed to put together a spinach salad with grilled chicken each day.  Dinner was another matter, I generally choose what is grilled, chicken or fish.  I went over in my calories by well over 100 but every night when I was back at the hotel I hit the gym.  The end result was a 3 lb loss for the week.  Its good at times to shake things up and change them up now and then... as long as you are able to get right back on track when you get home.

I would suggest that you bring those questions up with Dr.C and or Gabriella .... Maybe at group even. Those questions come up every so often and are very relevant and never get old. The answers you got here are of good intention but are all over the place.... Enough to confuse the issues. The guidence is available to you... Use it.... You paid for it!



Your in a program that is aiming to get you to 100% EWL or near and set you up for long term weight managment and some of the responses here may reflect different goals.



Is it hard to figure out.... Yes.... At first till you get the hang of it than it can become second nature. I never have had problems eating out. I traveled a lot for business and pleasure during WL and never had a problem. One time 15 restaurant meals in 5 days. Once in maintenance 14 days of eating out.... Not a problem.... I just came off of 8 days in Italy.... Eating pretty much a WL regime and well within my maintenance parameters. Eating out with friends, family or clients.... There is absolutely no difference. I don't control what goes in there mouth and they don't control or influence what goes in my mouth.



Above there is a statement that says its as easy or as hard as you make it.....pretty right on....you'll get the hang of it... It's not that hard!



frisco

Thanks.  You're right--I emailed Gabriella.