Dad chooses stepmom over me (sorry long)

It's a shame that you're dad didn't remain loyal to blood-family.   But as far as your step mother is concerned, the best revenge is to prove her WRONG - don't be a loser - rise above her low expectations. .

Sorry..thats rough.    But we know there are two sides (having raised 5 teens) .. Some kids by birth.. some step kids.. one adopted.  (to a comment someone else made..about choosing blood..i dont buy it.. family is family)  And as bad as you feel about your father choosing his wife over you.. He should.   Just like you should never leave your future husband just because one of your kids and he cant get along.   Your legally an adult.. (or about to be)  .. you can be with your mother.  That gives you a safe landing.  Life is hard.. never fair..  and hard again.   (and only gets harder) Try to own your part in it..did you treat his wife with love and respect? were you jealous and petty?  Usually there are all kinds of roles in a relationship..we all bring baggage to it.  You do.. your father did.. your mother did.. your step mom does.)  Hope the move brings good things to you..  Maybe this is where you meet that special someone you never would have met..if you were at your dads.  Life has a way of working itself out.  What starts off as 'the worst thing in the world" ..  years later, turns out to be the best thing that could have ever happenend. Good luck

Well hon, that blows :-(. I hope that you are able to patch things up with your dad before too long. But it might take a while, maybe years.  Right now you need to concentrate on finishing school, keeping grades up, etc., if you're hoping to enter college right away. What do you have going on for college prospects? Are you working?  I'm kind of scratching my head that he confiscated your car and your college money. What's up with that? Does he own the car? How did he get hold of your college money? Was it not in a separate account in your name?  Listen, this is hard. I remember very well what life with my dad was like. There was no stepmother involved, but oh boy, the stories I could tell. Ugh. It sounds like you just might be more on your own far sooner than you'd planned, and that sucks. But you can DO this. Many people have worked their way through college, taken on student loans, etc. It's a tough row to hoe, but it's doable.  Do you have your federal financial aid application in yet? Get that done and QUICK, because the deadlines are coming up. How about scholarship and grant applications?

If you are 18, you have a LEGAL right to the things that belong to you in your father's house, especially if they were given to you as gifts by other people or you paid for them with your own or gift money.

I suggest that  you make and "appointment" to go and get your things with a third party.

The third party would be a trusted family friend of both yours and your fathers... perhaps a neighbor, someone from church or school.  When you go, get ONLY the things out of your bedroom and nothing else.  If items are missing you can take your father and step mother to small claims court.. IF that is the path you choose to take.  

I am not taking sides with you or your father and his wife.  

ALSO, since you have been kicked out of your father's house---HE needs to be supporting you at your mother's house--via child support.  IF your mother was paying it to him, then SHE needs to go back to court to have the custody and financial aspect fo your custody determeind.  Yes, you are 18, BUT you are still a student in the eyes of the law and your parents are legally responsible.   Check your state laws... get your mother to call an attorney or seek advice via legal aid.  

Also if the college money was in an account with YOUR name on it too---you should persue that legally.  The college money may have been part of the divorce settlement with your mother.  I'd say... its time for a lawyer to get involved... and daddy might have to foot that bill too. 

Yes there is two sides to every story, but in short,  What Sandy said.  Hope things go well. Catherine

What made me sad is you having to go to a different school the last 4 weeks of high school.  It would be very difficult to leave all your friends since 3rd grade.  I hope your mom can step up and be a mother to you right now because no 18 yr. old should have to go through this.  One thing I believe is time does heal and being away from your stepmom and her negative comments is probably the best thing. Keep us updated on your situation because you can always talk to us when  life is hard.  Take Care, Louise 

 

I am really sorry your dad did this. Are there friends you can stay with to finish your senior year?