You may regret THIS one. The longest post I've ever written. Seven years of regret?

Dear MM,

I usually won't read long posts but I read yours and loved every word.  I am on my way to being 18 months out.  I was a judgemental new WLS patient thinking that I would be perfect, I would nevah, blah blah blah...Well, I did, bought the t-shirt, sold it on Ebay and traded up.  I have also come back, calmed down, gotten a little reasonable and chilled out.

I weigh 188 today.  I eat sandwiches on low carb, high protein bread.  I eat beef/lamb shwarmas twice a week.  When I eat what works for me I lose weight and/or maintain.  When I get all nutted up about what I am doing and think I should do what "you" are doing I don't.  I am still considered overweight according to the BMI chart.  If I weighed what the chart says I should I would look like a crack head - and personally I think crack is whack.

I am a stone cold food addict.  I love what you said about the XXX pounds lost forever.  I can't make that statement.  I am just here today doing what I am doing today.  I am happy with my body where it is (for the first time in a really long time) and I am eating things that don't make me feel hateful towards myself.

Thanks for your posts.  I am grateful for people like you on these boards!

Perfect, ha.  

Thank you.

I know.  Sometimes I cringe about what a PERFECT self righteous litte shyte I was.  But I live, I learn...

 I was too.

That account is gone. 

"injecting liquid donuts straight into our veins" you crack me up.

I am so glad that there is "real" people like you on this crazy planet.  I can totally relate to being young, broke, having kids, making bad decisions and gaining tons of weight.  It's my story too.  Thanks for sharing your story.  It takes courage to put your self out there like you do.

Laura

 Thank you.

We're still broke, with more kids.  LOL.

We're still broke with more kids too.  I see a pattern here.  LOL

Laura

I don't want to go "overboard" in my reaction here, but SERIOUSLY?  They haven't done anything other than tell you to "rest" your pancreas?  I think my fricking head is about to explode.

They need to find out WHY you are having the attacks.  It could a be a stone.  Granted if you have an ERCP it will bring on the attack in a very bad way, but what if a stone is lodged in there?  They could take it out and wham! no more pain after you get thru the initial pain of the ERCP-caused flare up.  I was in hospital for a week when it was finally taken care of.  First day was all about getting on top of the pain (morphine drip).  2nd day was testing, 3rd day was ERCP.  4th day was me screaming my head off in pain (I won't lie to you, the flare up after the ERCP sucked) and getting on top of the pain and by that night I felt FANFREAKINGTASTIC.  They kept me for another day and a half to make sure all was cool and then I was released.  No more pancreatitis.  Sanity returned.  Well as much sanity as I'm prone to.

Is there any way you can find a different doctor in your area?  A GI specialist who takes your pain seriously?  No one should live in that kind of pain for even 1 day - let alone be told to "rest" it with no other help.  Are they giving you pain medication at least?  And I mean hard core pain relief of the narcotic variety.   I live in chronic pain from the 2 diseases I deal with on a daily basis.  Chronic pain can cause you to go nuts.  Untreated chronic pain WILL cause you to go nuts.  Honey, get thee to a better doctor. 

Let me know if I can help in any other way.

They explained that I could have that testing done, but short story is that the upper pain subsides and goes away, and it was deemed unnecessary.  There were only a couple times of OMG SHOOT ME pain.

Now, it's different.  I believe there are a couple things going on, but now that we ruled out an internal hernia, it's time to move on to what could hurt NEAR THIS same LOW spot.  AKA, the uterus that might be offering to move out on it's own.

I lurk on a grads-WLS Yahoo group, mostly RNY-ers many years out, and a while back they were talking about Sphyncter of Oddi pain, they called it SOD.  Something to do with the gall bladder "outlets" (can't think what they're called) going into spasm, apparently it's incredibly painful and sounds like what you're experiencing, the recent abdominal pain.  Sometimes triggered by morphine-based pain relievers, amazingly, and posters talked about going to the ER for some other reason, being given something morphine-based, and then having to deal with a SOD episode. The spasms can also be triggered by unknown factors.  They can last for a while, too.  Just a thought to pass along, perhaps you can do some research on this.

I read your blog faithfully, Beth, you're the reason I didn't get an RNY!  Thanks for your honesty, your attitude, your courage, and your sass.  What would we do without you??????