Do others understand what you are feeling?
For me it was more about the outside of my body matching who I was on the inside. I was MO for twenty years and watched my entire adult life pass by like a bystander at a party you aren't invited too. I wanted to wear clothes I saw in fashion magazines, high heels, fitted dresses and jeans that didnt bind that I could actually breath in. Honestly I never had any desire to ride my bike 20 miles or fly a kite or jump out of a plane, that isn't me. Its different for everyone, what you want from wls is your hearts desires, mine are mine. I wanted to be able to cross my legs, paint my toes, dress up and feel feminine and have people notice me instead of ignore me like I was invisible. I guess the fact I was normal weight until I was 20 made it harder, I got loads of male attention until then and then got married and got MO and turned completely invisible to everyone including myself. I was like a ghost walking the earth, miserable and lost, my family was horrified by my size, completely embarassed by the way I looked. I never ever ever for one minute made my son feel bad about how he looked because I know how incredible it is on your self esteem. My son is quite full of himself, it makes me laugh actually he thinks hes a player, but good for him atleast hes not like I was and he doesn't have any body size issues. He told me his idea of the perfect womyn was Kim Kardashian, yeah I have to agree she looks pretty damn good. So to sum it up, no it never stops suprising me to see my flat stomach and the tiny clothes that I can now wear and the fact its my dream come true.
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