OT-How long are you willing to wait???
I think 90 days is a great idea because at the 90 day mark you will either be really into that person or moved on.
That is true. I have seen and been in many "situations" I won't call them relationships per se that I started off really liking them but ended up not that interested as the months wore on for whatever reason. I think you have to know yourself as well. Sometimes women confuse sex with love. They have sex with a man and the following week they are talking about how in love they are.
I don't get that at all. So if you are the kind of woman that equates sex with love than booty calls shouldn't be your thing. But if you know how to get in and get out then you might not mind getting it in the first night out.
That is true. I have seen and been in many "situations" I won't call them relationships per se that I started off really liking them but ended up not that interested as the months wore on for whatever reason. I think you have to know yourself as well. Sometimes women confuse sex with love. They have sex with a man and the following week they are talking about how in love they are.
I don't get that at all. So if you are the kind of woman that equates sex with love than booty calls shouldn't be your thing. But if you know how to get in and get out then you might not mind getting it in the first night out. 
"Real change comes from within"
Hey KT:
What if ol crazy ass Steve came up with that 90 day time period one noiight when he and da boys were playing poker and he LOST the bet! I'll bet that hoe he married didn't wait no 90 days before she gave him the "punanny" and breaking up his marriage. (Stats show that this marriage has abouta 8% chance of success) Personally, if I want opinions on relationships, I go to Relationship Counselors or someone with a good track record. Let's be real, the reason ol Steve is on the best seller's list and peeps are buying this book is because he has tapped into that "Black Network" like Jakes, Tyler Perry...network. This is some "ghetto philosophy" he is dropping for a buck...no harm, no foul.
I saw Steve on Oprah and he is funny, but he don't know **** about relationships (just listen to what he said), and I think his perspective on men are from a "DOG" point of view and I don't believe all men are dogs. I get it that you showing Steve some "black" love by buying his book, but dayyum, I wish Black folks would show some other blacks and themselves love by buying some real informative books on Relationship Building, Self Improvement, or even "The Audacity of Hope.
Next book by Steve Harvey: How To Make a Successful Marriage - The 4th Time Around, Maybe; Subtitle: Ramblings of a Serial Monogamist?
What if ol crazy ass Steve came up with that 90 day time period one noiight when he and da boys were playing poker and he LOST the bet! I'll bet that hoe he married didn't wait no 90 days before she gave him the "punanny" and breaking up his marriage. (Stats show that this marriage has abouta 8% chance of success) Personally, if I want opinions on relationships, I go to Relationship Counselors or someone with a good track record. Let's be real, the reason ol Steve is on the best seller's list and peeps are buying this book is because he has tapped into that "Black Network" like Jakes, Tyler Perry...network. This is some "ghetto philosophy" he is dropping for a buck...no harm, no foul.
I saw Steve on Oprah and he is funny, but he don't know **** about relationships (just listen to what he said), and I think his perspective on men are from a "DOG" point of view and I don't believe all men are dogs. I get it that you showing Steve some "black" love by buying his book, but dayyum, I wish Black folks would show some other blacks and themselves love by buying some real informative books on Relationship Building, Self Improvement, or even "The Audacity of Hope.
Next book by Steve Harvey: How To Make a Successful Marriage - The 4th Time Around, Maybe; Subtitle: Ramblings of a Serial Monogamist?
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*I* can only speak for myself here. I do not read books for relationship advice. I look to my past experiences as my guide to how I handle things in the future. That being said I was interested in reading his book for entertainment purposes and I do not look at his book as my relationship bible to clutch to my chest and live and die by those rules. I have no issue with Steve writing a book and tapping into his network. White people do it all day every day. You work what you got when you got it. I personally buy my books that are for entertainment purposes only from black authors only. If I am going to spend my hard earned dollars I want it to support our black authors. Do you know how hard it is to get a publishing deal? (This is a rhetorical question)
"Real change comes from within"
Witholding sex is gonna make a man try harder or abandon the project, respect aint got **** to do with it.
As VV used to say, what a grown ass woman does with her grown ass ***** is her grown ass business (or something like that)
Last I checked I wasn't in that bed, or on that table, or couch, or floor, or shower by my damn self, so we'll just be two gutter ass ****s together. The double standard has always been bull**** to me. 90 days is great in theory, but I don't think you can time a vibe, if it's right, it's right... BUT you have to keep it in perspective. Givin up the cookie don't make him your man. If you can't live with that, don't do it, if you can rock on.
As VV used to say, what a grown ass woman does with her grown ass ***** is her grown ass business (or something like that)
Last I checked I wasn't in that bed, or on that table, or couch, or floor, or shower by my damn self, so we'll just be two gutter ass ****s together. The double standard has always been bull**** to me. 90 days is great in theory, but I don't think you can time a vibe, if it's right, it's right... BUT you have to keep it in perspective. Givin up the cookie don't make him your man. If you can't live with that, don't do it, if you can rock on.
It is never too late to be what you might have been
~George Eliot
(deactivated member)
on 3/25/09 5:52 am
on 3/25/09 5:52 am
I haven't read Steve Harvey's book and I'm not really sure if I plan to buy my own copy, but I'm not so sure if having a hard and fast timetable is always a wise thing.
In this day of internet dating and technology does the 90 days start the first time you send me a wink on Match? Or does it begin after our 1st phone convo? Or is it really after the 1st one on one meeting?
I don't think its necessarily wise to take advice from someone that you don't know personally and that doesn't know you or your situation. Ultimately as an adult all you can do is be responsible for your own actions and they shouldn't necessarily be based on how someone else will respond or think of you.
Not sure if all my ramblings are making sense but that's all i got.
In this day of internet dating and technology does the 90 days start the first time you send me a wink on Match? Or does it begin after our 1st phone convo? Or is it really after the 1st one on one meeting?
I don't think its necessarily wise to take advice from someone that you don't know personally and that doesn't know you or your situation. Ultimately as an adult all you can do is be responsible for your own actions and they shouldn't necessarily be based on how someone else will respond or think of you.
Not sure if all my ramblings are making sense but that's all i got.
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