OT - Wine me and dine me

Hey Pastor Di, I can't speak for Bishop Jakes, but Frederick Price is no joke and no teddy bear, I assure  you.   I'm sure he'd cuss and punch you in face too!!  Born out of Pastor Price's church and mentored by Pastor Price came, Dr. Phillip Goudeaux of Calvery Christian Center in Sacremento CA ( prior to being saved, a mighty man of God and a world changing Pastor, he was the minister of defense for the black panthers in the 60's). From Dr. Goudeaux's church came my Pastor, Pastor Tim Gustafson, an absolutely amazing Pastor, father, husband and servant of God.  None of these men would be, on ANY level, discribed as teddy bears...grisley bears maybe ...but teddy bears, never

You STOOPID COLE!!!!!! 

Who would I invite?  Lesseee....

#1 - My daughter's father - once I get that nicca in the room I can find out where he staying and get his azz served with child support papers and get somma my $ back! 

#2 - my busta azz jacklegg surgeon - to make a Godfather type offer to him 'Gimme my money back and I will take the FOOT out yo azz I got with the BBB and Medical Board complaints I have filed'..........

#3 - YOU - cause I would just LOVE the chance to break bread and kick it with someone on comedic par as me - and you fo SHO fit the bill!!!!  Ummm - but no cookie exchange - even if I DO order the lobster...... LOL!!!

#4 - The Rock - cause he's single these days and I wanna chance - even if it IS a long shot.  Don't know why he got divorced, but I would LOVE to let him get on my nerves.......

#5 - The mudda*****ka that designed the Dodge Intrepid - that mofo has a design flaw that requires you to replace a damn engine sensor untold amount of times - WHY THA HELL you do that man?  Resale values on them hoes ain't ISH!!!!!!

  @ #3 - YOU - cause I would just LOVE the chance to break bread and kick it with someone on comedic par as me - and you fo SHO fit the bill!!!!  Ummm - but no cookie exchange - even if I DO order the lobster...... LOL!!!


True story -

Back in the day I use to jokingly say to all of my dates, "Now you know if we go out and you order the lobster, the dayum meter is running..." (meaning that I was gonna be expecting a "cookie" exchange to take place if they ordered something that expensive.)  One night I took this girl out to dinner and she ordered the lobster.  When it finally came she scarfed that **** down so fast until she looked like she was a runaway slave who had heard the slavemaster's dogs coming for her escaped ass off in the background over the horizon.  I just sat back with embarrassment and watched.  When she got done she just looked up at me like she was the winner at a Nathan's hotdog eating contest and said, "See I didn't take too long did I?" 

I fell out laughing. 

When I told her what I meant by "...ordering the lobster meant that the meter was running..." she got so mad with me and never went out with me again.  LMAO

Damn you I just sprayed my damn monitor!!!!!!!!!!!

Oooooh!  A squirter. 

The boyz love that kinda ****  Next time try and catch it on video and send it to me.

See I can't mess with you, you almost made me do it again....

***note to self do not drink and read Double Ayy's posts*****  that  is all!!!

Sounds like she was not too bright you probably would not have wanted to go out with her again anyway :)

MM - in response to #5 - I absolutely LOVED my Intrepid ES...until the driver's seat broke...and they originally charged me $90 to fix it...and it was still broke...then they said oh...we found the real problem and it's not covered under your warranty...that will be $900!

I said...uh...neh, I'll pass...hook me up with that black Durango out thur...I'll be back later to pick it up...left the Intrepid right there (that ****** sold the NEXT day!)...but good thing about it - it only had 43,000 miles on it...and I had it for 6 years...with never a problem - and they gave me $8,000 for it in the trade.

DD

Oh I loved Shellay (that was my name for her) to DEF!!!!  But that damn crank and cam sensor was a mudda******!  I replaced that bad boy three times and after that - said it's time to get a FOREIGN job - wasn't NO way I waws going to get ANOTHER damn Dodge..... so you did go to stay brand loyal - I hauled my azz into Carmax and took the 8K upside down hit and kept rolling...... glad to be out from under that mug!  I picked an Edmund's and consumer choice best used car pick as my next ride!  LOL - it's going to be a LONG time before I cop a domestic again