OT: Background checks

I did run a background check on the last guy I dated, at that time I was checking to see if there was a wife I hadn't been told about-been lied to about that before.  Luckily that came out A-OK.

I like Brenda's time line.  The only thing I haven't been able to come to terms with is  once you are in the relationship, when do you let them know you checked them out?  On one hand I look at it that if you don't have anything to lie about its all good.  On the other hand I don't like the idea of sneaking around behind someone's back 'checking them out.'

Somebody, I think it was Juanita told me she pretty much lets a guy know on the 1st date that she's going to run a check on them-I'm just not that bold.

I wouldn't ever let them know its not necessary. Unless we got really serious and even then it would be a drinking joke.

Here, here for letting him know up front.  He either understands your reasoning or he walks which will save you a few bucks. 

True dat!

I've utilized Zabasearch.com, and Pipl.com just to see what came up.  You have to be careful these days, cause you just never know....and people lie about the dumbest things. Things so small, they aren't worth lying about.  Like my granny says...'if a nig*a will lie about the weather, he'll lie about his wife and kids at home.' Granny is a 'G', lol

I've used Zabasearch before but never Pipl.com. Thanks for the tip!

Yes, it would bother me. 

Not because I'd have anything to hide, but because a) it infringes on my private business (depending on how deep you decide to go via the net) and b) I DON'T know chiot about the person and they could just as easily be stealing the identity. 

I understand WHY someone would want to do background check, but that doesn't mean anyone has to like it. 

I feel you D - I hate that I HAVE to do it.  I seriously take EVERYONE at face value and give the benefit of the doubt - but have been BIT in the ARSE way too many times to keep that policy in effect! 

Ain't nothing private these days

Unlike several people I know I'm not interested in being nosy or digging into the personal business of friends, co-workers and acquaintances just those persons that I plan to spend time with who have no connection to my life or the life of friends...a girl just has to be careful. Like someone said every criminal does not have a criminal record and I am mindful of this.  I pride myself in my gift of discernment but backing that up with technology just helps me build my computer skills :)

Mack Mama do what you gotta do cause the dudes will lie and female's I am sure too but I aint dating none of those. But anyway 2 years ago around this time I ran into a dude i worked with when I was in my late teens early 20's the crazy part was it was the day i took my lunch break and walked to the court house to file my divorce papers. Now when i seen him he start talking all this talk about how he use to be so in love with me then and blah blah blah. He put my number in his phone under my name gave me his number and even said he had 6 yes 6 kids now and was divorced. Well *hit just wasnt adding up all the time but I wasnt really tripping too much as i was just enjoying my new found freedom and doing me. But bro was like ooh I love you and he wanted to buy another house we should move together and all this other B.S. anyway make a long story short i would ask the MOFO are you sure your arent still married nope divorced three years my homegirl called me got the 411 on the *astard and the MOFO wasnt divorced still lived with his wife had 1 or two kids with another chick making the baby Mama # raise from 4 to 5 and he was still messing with baby mama #5, living with the wife and was telling people he was probably gonna have a 6th baby mama soon. (me). Girl girl girl lets just say he better be glad I am no longer in my 20's and didnt feel like acting a fool thank GOD for the condoms 2. I aint no fool.
So I say all that to say handle your business do what you gotta do now i wouldnt spend hundreds on nobody but if it reasonablethen do it.
Good luck and if you findout anymore free lookup spots keep me posted.
Tasha