What to do with 2 diff surgery dates RNY or DS?

Poodles, thank you for your post - made me really think about the dates coming up! I have the pre op for RNY on 18 Nov, and need to get the bariatric evaluation records from them sent out to the DS surgeon asap. It is odd for me to have never met Dr. Martin and only talk to him on the phone twice, but I do feel that the DS is the right procedure for me.

I agree, with the kid's dad leaving soon for training in Germany then deploying from there to Iraq - I am trying to not have their lives too crazy either - so hopefully we can make this surgery trip more of a family Christmas vacation to see family for them.
Praying we can figure out the way to get tickets.

Is it possible for gramma to come to your house and stay with the kids? Then they can stay in school and at home in familiar surroundings. Lots of folks have traveled alone for their DS. It is doable! Anyway...just a thought.

prayers your way.....

Darlene, you may have the best idea yet.. we were planning on having my mom come to help with my RNY surgery here.. so depending on how long the Dr needs me to stay in the hospital, and how long before I can fly home - may be the best solution! I will follow up on that plan, but I'm have a hard time with the idea of not being with the kids as they are emotional with dad going to Germany before deploying to Iraq.
your prayers are so appreciated!

I am a military brat, my dad was deployed to Vietnam long before the age of computers and cell phones. Your kids are old enough to know the "lay of the land" this is going to be two weeks. Two weeks that you are doing something miraculous for your health.

I did my surgery out of town. I kept my DH and kids at home and I did the surgery and hospital by myself. Personally I did not need my kids seeing me post-op anyway. They saw me leaving for a better life and they saw me when I got home excited and grateful for a new lease on life.

Personally I wanted the most normal relationship with food post-op because the memory of surgery fades but the reality of eating 3 meals a day is there in their face daily. It made my life normal and we act like a normal family now except I make better food choices and I incorporate exercise 5 days a week into my life. I lead my family by example.

The reality is that you are head of your family while he is overseas. If they see you in charge, confident and dedicated to a new life they will get on board.

I self-paid by the way and so we skimped and saved for several years afterwards to rebuild up our emergency funds. This is all doable. You just need to make it happen.

You know, kids are pretty resiliant...   I was ten when my dad went to Vietnam.  I had surgery myself not long after he left, and then my sister had surgery a month later.  Then my mom went to Hawaii for two weeks R&R with my dad and we had some crazy old lady (she was probably in her 40s - ha!) stay with us while she was gone. We were really fine with all of it - I think it was much harder on my mom than it was on any of us. 

I'd say do whatever you need to do to get your DS.  The kids will survive and probably manage a lot better than you think they will! 

Good luck and I know your DS will be a success!!!! 

Laura, thank you for your words of encouragement. You are right, I'm sure it all will be tougher on me than the kids! haha
Thank you for sharing your experience it actually helped me somewhat on looking at the long term of what is best.
So, I sure hope we can work out the financial details to get me to that pre op & surgery date across the country!
Thanks for your reply & kind words.

Laura, ps.. looks like your DS date is the same week as mine - yeay a surgery buddy... praying your journey goes wonderfully & quick recovery also!

Hey!  I didn't notice that earlier!      I think your "journey" will be quite a bit longer than mine (I'm only 35 minutes from my hospital, for which I am eternally grateful)!  I truly believe that if it's meant to be, everything will just fall into place for you and your family.  Please keep posting back and let us know how things work out. We can compare notes as we recover! 

my 2 cents worth..
can you fly your Mom to your place and have her babysit while you are gone?  If not your Mom....  a local friend - church member - local support group member -- co-worker - someone who is willing to stay with your kids...  just a thought.  Heck if you were in my neck of the woods I would babysit !!

best of luck to you and your journey !!

If you decide the DS is for you, dont settle for anything less, like the RNY. I am curious, if you have decided on the DS, and to me it sounds like you have, then why do you still have the RNY surgery scheduled? If DS is the surgery for you, then keeping the RNY as a backup should not even be a thought. The other option is changing your DS surgery date to a time that would be more convienent for you and your family. Honestly IMHO waiting a few more weeks, months for the DS is so worth it when you are talking about the rest of your life! :) Good luck on your journey. Wishing you a smooth surgery and speedy recovery.