Love after weightloss
I do think about this at times,
At my age, I wonder if there is still someone out there, and now afer DS will it need to be someone who has an affinity for " Char Pei puppys "??? LOL
Bottom line though , I am so much healthier and happier with MYSELF, Maye it will come accross instead of the miserale one i was when heavier.
I guess time will tell !!!
Debi
At my age, I wonder if there is still someone out there, and now afer DS will it need to be someone who has an affinity for " Char Pei puppys "??? LOL
Bottom line though , I am so much healthier and happier with MYSELF, Maye it will come accross instead of the miserale one i was when heavier.
I guess time will tell !!!
Debi
Although not one to discuss my sex life with others, I'm almost afraid not to so that others *****ad this will not get the wrong idea about the DS. My sex life has improved many times over since my surgery. I'm at the age when it takes a little effort anyway to get the flames roaring, if you know what I mean, but things have been great! My DH LOVES my new body and that about says it all.
I'm a bit with Kirmy - without all the dogs and peeing and whatnot!!
I really expected as the weight dropped off for my sex drive to skyrocket - not so much. Its not that I don't have ANY sex drive, just not as much as I did pre-op and not at all what I expected. I hope that it kicks it up a notch soon!
That being said - when we do get it on - it is a LOT more fun! Many more positions are open to us now that I'm not 350 pounds! And he loves me loose skin and all - I wish that I loved myself half as much!!
And the above poster is right - if you meet someone for whom your skin is a deal-breaker the is NOT the man for you...and does not deserve you. I think being up front and honest about the WLS and all that from the get-go will help you avoid the whole OMG your loose skin is disgusting to me. I'm not saying start the first date with "so I used weigh xxx and I had WLS, and my poops are like this, and I eat like this, and my skin is all saggy and I look like one of those wrinkle puppies" - I think that might make it the last date too :) - but you get my meaning.
You will enjoy this crazy journey. Not every single bit of it but by and large it is worth all the negatives - or we would not be as happy of a group of post-ops as we are!
I really expected as the weight dropped off for my sex drive to skyrocket - not so much. Its not that I don't have ANY sex drive, just not as much as I did pre-op and not at all what I expected. I hope that it kicks it up a notch soon!
That being said - when we do get it on - it is a LOT more fun! Many more positions are open to us now that I'm not 350 pounds! And he loves me loose skin and all - I wish that I loved myself half as much!!
And the above poster is right - if you meet someone for whom your skin is a deal-breaker the is NOT the man for you...and does not deserve you. I think being up front and honest about the WLS and all that from the get-go will help you avoid the whole OMG your loose skin is disgusting to me. I'm not saying start the first date with "so I used weigh xxx and I had WLS, and my poops are like this, and I eat like this, and my skin is all saggy and I look like one of those wrinkle puppies" - I think that might make it the last date too :) - but you get my meaning.
You will enjoy this crazy journey. Not every single bit of it but by and large it is worth all the negatives - or we would not be as happy of a group of post-ops as we are!
Marci
Dana:
My surgery is November 22nd. I am dreaming about the same things! I was a salsa dancer pre-obesity. I am planning on becoming a swing dancer and buying all the cute dresses. I will not advertise my long stretch of abstinence (years), but am planning on finding a "friend" 6 to 9 months post op!
Let's make this FUN!
dawn
My surgery is November 22nd. I am dreaming about the same things! I was a salsa dancer pre-obesity. I am planning on becoming a swing dancer and buying all the cute dresses. I will not advertise my long stretch of abstinence (years), but am planning on finding a "friend" 6 to 9 months post op!
Let's make this FUN!
dawn
Thank you everyone! I loved the sincere, heart felt, honest and hysterically funny posts. My DS Weight loss journy hasn't quite begun yet, although mentally it began months ago.
My left calf muscle is screaming to me that it began with our long early morning walk. Now my calf is recovering and my heart is light and smiling for this Veterans day.
My left calf muscle is screaming to me that it began with our long early morning walk. Now my calf is recovering and my heart is light and smiling for this Veterans day.
I wish Kirmy lived here...... There's a woman I'd like to meet.
If a man loves you, the skin won't be an issue. If it is an issue, move on. If he is that concerned with skin, he is ill equipped to deal with ageing in general. Fact is, if you live a whole life, no one dies pretty. Whatever shape you are in today is always going in one direction, downhill.
I am still trying to come to terms with the fact that I will never be able to afford plastics. Unless I win the lottery or something like that. I look awful naked and I know it. Once upon a time, the gorgeous man in my life was trying to 'comfort' me about the skin issue. I don't think I will ever recover from what he said, because it's true. I have to keep reminding myself his heart is in the right place.
"Darling, " he said, " I don't mind your loose skin at all and I think I am a lucky man."
"Why is that?" I said.
"There aren't many men who are lucky enough to make love to a woman with 6 breasts."
So of course I had to think about this and he's right. I do look like a woman with 6(saggy) breasts who is missing 4 nipples. Or you could say I have an extra a$$ in the front too, I guess. Anyway, it's ugly and I own it. This remark really hurt but it's too true. It's a reality I didn't want to see.
To balance out what I just said, I'll also tell you I have a great post DS sex life. 6 breasts or not.
If a man loves you, the skin won't be an issue. If it is an issue, move on. If he is that concerned with skin, he is ill equipped to deal with ageing in general. Fact is, if you live a whole life, no one dies pretty. Whatever shape you are in today is always going in one direction, downhill.
I am still trying to come to terms with the fact that I will never be able to afford plastics. Unless I win the lottery or something like that. I look awful naked and I know it. Once upon a time, the gorgeous man in my life was trying to 'comfort' me about the skin issue. I don't think I will ever recover from what he said, because it's true. I have to keep reminding myself his heart is in the right place.
"Darling, " he said, " I don't mind your loose skin at all and I think I am a lucky man."
"Why is that?" I said.
"There aren't many men who are lucky enough to make love to a woman with 6 breasts."
So of course I had to think about this and he's right. I do look like a woman with 6(saggy) breasts who is missing 4 nipples. Or you could say I have an extra a$$ in the front too, I guess. Anyway, it's ugly and I own it. This remark really hurt but it's too true. It's a reality I didn't want to see.
To balance out what I just said, I'll also tell you I have a great post DS sex life. 6 breasts or not.
I am actually optomistic that good men won't mind. My own sister who was MO as a child and into adulthood (back then I was thin) ended up losing over 100 lbs with extreme dieting and exercise 2-4 hours every day. She got down to a size 9 and fell in love wtih a great man who not only didn't mind when he found out but was there through her lower body lift (she wanted it done before they got married and intimate). He packed her open wounds for months because she had some infections. Now if that isn't love....
Anyway there is hope. But it was a funny laugh out loud thought on my 3 hour drive.
Take Care,
Dana
Anyway there is hope. But it was a funny laugh out loud thought on my 3 hour drive.
Take Care,
Dana
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