OUR Journies....LONG!!!

Sherri- Thanks and YES I do know that you are here for more than CAKES and housefires, LOL!You have to be -and as far as cakes and baking, you'll have to stay, cause BETTY CROCKER- AIN"T -for me! I tried, had my experience, and am saving the rest for you, my friend! LOL!!! Makes me appreciate all those concoctions that you have made and shared with all of us, so much more!I have read and reread and am keeping all of your words close to revisit! I do understand and am finally hoping to realize once and for all that holding everything in and staying to myself is not going to work, for me! Talking to Ellen today helped me so much and YES even letting me forget about myself at times, while listening to her and yet realizing that we were walking in each others shoes for a bit. It was an eye opener!The tears are coming even harder but I know that they are needed and that I must keep on keeping on. Hopefully tomorrow my meds can be changed yet once again, and I can be on a better track!I struggle so much with the feelings of failure and letting others down, as I am sure many of us do/have/will - Although I know deep down that there are plenty of positives as well it is so hard to see them when my enemy depression keep****ting me so hard!I have talked with a counselor and am looking into finding a different one to talk with as well, and hopefully that will help some, too!Thanks for being there for me as long as you have been all the way through my journey and the housefire! I know that I have said Thank You before and I must say it again. You are a blessing to know and to have as a friend and to have for support and be in not only my corner but many others on her as well!YOU are the one person that I do feel that I have lacked in communication with- WHY- first becayse of the fire, you were there, immediately and done so much for my family with donations and all, and YES we appreciated it very much, BUT I feel that I did not communicate that WELL enough!Secondly, I remember ELLEN calling me and telling me about your condition in the hospital and just crying and crying and worrying, but you my friend NEVER really were aware of how much that did effect me, why, because I was scared and held it in and by the time I felt I could talk about it the regret of not talking and being there set in, uugghh! WOW, this is hard, and who needs to pay for therapy-I think I will save this as another personal conversation. I just hope that you know that I do care and like I have said, I am not a great communicator, but I do think of you often as well as many others and that I do care! In many ways, like you have said about yourself as well in the past- this is my family and for the most part closer than some members in my immediate family! I guess growing up and not being able to communicate and or show emotions has once again resurfaced some issues into my present life. Again, I am hoping to right the wrongs that I have done and hope that you understandand accept my apologies! I Love Ya and am greatful to have you as my friend! Hugz Dawn

I LOVE EVERYONE AND I TOO AM HERE HEALTHY,LEANING MY BABY STEPS EACH DAY, HOLDING EACH OTHERS HANDS, WE MITE FALL DOWN BUT WE WON'T STAY DOWN. I THINK I MENT LEARNING BUT WE MIGHT LEAN TOO, & thats ok . I am here too , if you need me cause I sure will always need you. gail

Gail my angelette! Thank You! You know that I will always be here for you and YES I know that you are here for me,too! I appreciate it! When you asked me to be your angel, I found a forever angelette! LOL! Thanks for talking with me on the phone this last week, it helped just chatting! I know that I should call more often and I will work on that, too! Please call me as well, anytime! I may need that call, just as bad and be stuck in a rut, ya know! I never tire from talking with ya, lol! I know that we have shared some very similar experiences, while chatting! Hopefully we can continue to encourage/support each other! I know that we will. I look forward to seeing you and spending time with you! Thanks for all of my ecards, they have brought me many smiles! I LOVE YA and you will be seeing/hearing from me more, I promise! BIG Hugz Dawn

Dawn - First off (( BIG HUGS ))  It was awesome meeting you today and getting to chat for a couple minutes. :) You as well as everyone on this board are an absolute blessing to me. Even though I've yet to feel hunger and all the fun stuff I still battle demons of making the right choices. Sometimes I do great and others not so great. I'm just thankful that if I need a good butt kicking I can count on everyone here to do it because my hubby is such an enabler. You all are always in my prayers because I pray for my FAMILY daily and thats what I consider you all. Sorry I'm not so great with words but I just want you to know that I am also here if you ever need to talk or vent or cry!! I haven't talked about it much out on the main board but depression stuff had really gotten bad for me the past few months. I finally had talked to my doctor about it and got on a medication that seems to help some for me and thats been a great relief but it still sneaks up on me sometimes. Keep your head up though. We all LOVE you here. :) (( HUGS ))

Thanks Misty, It was graet meeting you and talking with you as well! I truly can understand all of the depression stuff. UUGGHH! I was orignally taking effexor xr before my surgery and for a bit after, but it seemed to quit working! Some have said that was because it is an EX but others I know and have talked to are taking the XR and having NO problems, oh how I wish that was me I was GOOD on it, but finding a new one has been a chore,to say the least!Please know that I appreciate your kind words and am sure many others on here do as well! Sometimes we all need a swift kick in the btt to get back on/stay on track and to just do the right things! It isn't always a sweet journey but again it is our journey and we have to make the best of it, by hopefully staying/getting back on track and doing what we need to do! Unfortunately, for me, staying clammed up within myself has not helped me with the support that I have had here on OH and also not allowed me to use my best habits along my journey! I finally decided that I needed to talk bout it- NOT only for MYSELF but for OTHERS on here as well! WHY, because after talking to others I realized that some of the issues that I have been fighting several of my OH friends have also and wecould let it all out and hopefully help each other, not to mention, maybe there is still someone else out there in their lurking status that can relate as well! I know there is, I have already spoken with a couple via my personal PM on here, so it was worth sharing! Hugz to those, you know who you are! Love ya all and hope that you have some answers on your medical needs soon and are able to enjoy your journey a bit more! Hugz Dawn

cymbalta is my best friend. i've been battling depression so long that i can't even remember when it started. it's just as hard to fight as obesity, and one quite frankly feeds the other and vice versa. the important thing is that when you notice you are doing something bad like eating something bad for you or withdrawing from someone, stop it immediately and go do the opposite. it has taken me a very long time to discover my triggers, but once i finally see them that's my cue that i need help. we're all here for you. and it's just as important for us to help you as it is for you to help us. we all need each other.

Thanks for your response! I will work on trying to do the opposite! I will ask my doc about cymbalta! I hopefully will be having my meds changed tomorrow, we shall see! Thanks again, and good luck to you on your journey! Hugz Dawn

Think I need to ask about Cymbalta too. I wish we could all get together more often. Maybe we could have more get togethers. Anyone like to go camping? It would be fun to get everyone together and have some real time together. I love my OH family too and anytime I can help someone, please feel free to call or email me.

Hello, they did do an OH campout last year at the KOA that Hope and her husband own. A few went, I believe Sherri, Ellen and Cheryl went and maybe a few others. I aso believe that there was some who lived nearby that dropped in for a visit! I enjoy getting together as well. I look forward to seeing what other functions can e planned! I know that Jacqui was looking t a trip to Holiday World this summer, so that is a possibility also! Good luck and let me know how you are and if/when you see Dr. igh, how it goes! Hugz Dawn It was nice talking with you on Saturdy, again! Hugz

I'm going to make an appointment with Dr. Nigh tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes. Keep me posted on any get togethers that you hear about. It was good talking to you too. HUGS right back at ya!