Happy Saturday!

happy saturday

Hang in there and dont give up. I was always feeling low before my surgery.  I wanted to be a hermit and not go to any family functions.  When people would beg me to come. I would snap there head off.  I said a lot of cruel and hurtful things to my family because I was so down on myself and took it out on them.  Since surgery, I want to get out there and go places.  You will to! Your hubby loves you for who you are. I dont know him, but I am willing to bet he isnt going anywhere. Dont give up on the insurance, keep fighting with them.  Take that anger out on them..lol.   (((((((Hugs))))))))

Lin~ Girl...hang in there...you KNOW what you want to do...now just get MAD....don't take it anymore...tell that insurance company off!

Goodness...don't worry about the negativity...we ALL are negative at some point...thats what this posse is here for! VENT...VENT..VENT...and CRY...and then when you ARE happy....SHARE IT!

Hey...add me to your myspace! Do you have yahoo messenger or AOL messenger?  Add me there too! I am usually up for chat when I am online! myspace is....  http://myspace.com/kamikazecowgirlhoney yahoo messenger is...  cowgirlhoney2001 AOL is... Janenemarkwiz hugggggggs Janene

 

BTW... Do you watch Boston Legal?  The new episode was on last night....OMG maybe you should take Denny's attitude...he has mad cow...LOL and last night he went to work at the law firm with his boxers on and suit coat!  MOON the world GF!    hugggggggs, Janene

OK Sweetie I haven't posted much this week because I'm having a crappy day so I don't want to pass off my bad vibes.  Your post made me want to reply though. First of all, don't give up.  It took me over 4 years to finally get approved.  I had come to the point where I was just going to go into debt for the rest of my life and pay for it myself and WHAMOH...the insurance changed and I scheduled my surgery and now I'm nearly 6 months out.  Everything happens when it's supposed to.  I really believe that...to everything there is a season. Now about your husband, I totally understand.  My husband is one hunka hunka burning love.  He used to be a model for pete's sake and here he is married to a cow.  I couldn't even get pregnant!  I just wanted to leave him because I couldn't be the wife "I thought" he wanted.  That would've been the most tragic thing I could've ever done.  Troy loves me for who I am not for what I look like or for my birthing ability (we did eventually have a beautiful baby girl with the help of fertility drugs and she's now 7).  Of course he's thrilled with my success at this surgery but he was really against it at first because he was afraid he'd lose me...either to complications or to another man.  I'm sure your hubby is the same way.  He loves you for you.

And now about the depression issue...when Troy and I were going through infertility issues, my doctor suggested I start antidepressants.  As if I didn't feel bad enough about myself, here was a medical professional telling me I was crazy.  Troy and I discussed it and decided I should give it a try.  Boy what a difference it made!  I not only have depression but I also have high anxiety levels.  I was on Celexa for years.  Right before my rny I was changed to Effexor because it works better for gastric by-pass patients.  I love it.  I'm not saying you need to be medicated, I'm just saying don't see it as another burden or as a bad quality about yourself.  It's a disease just like obesity. 

I hope this helps some.  You hang in there and know there are people out there with some sense of what you're feeling.

Smooches,

Jacqui

Lin, honey honey honey, you are being way to hard on you!!! No one is as hard on us as we are on ourselves. We are usually our own worst enemy.  Just as was told to you in other posts your time is going to come. I know that if God brings you to it He is going to get you through it. He has brought you this far and he isn't going to just dump you now. He is a loving God and so just remember that. I have heard in some instances it takes a long time to get the approval and others gets it just at the snap of their fingers. Mine took just over a year but I got through it. YOU WILL LIVE THROUGH THIS!!! I know at times you don't agree but I promise you will. Just bear patiently your heart.  Your hubby loves you for you not what you look like. He isn't there just to waste time. He is there and he probably wants to support you. Just let him. Let him not only support you but to love you too. He is there to love you and wants to do what ever he can to help you. Remember he married you for better or for worst. God only knows that Bill more of the worst in the first 19 years of our marriage. I was a ***** on wheels. But that is another story!!!! It took me a long time to get the attitude of "If you don't like me oh well it is your loss not mine.". I got that attitude out of self-preservation I think. That way I could dump you before I got dumped because I just KNEW that you weren't goiing to stay with me no matter what the situation was. I was preparing myself and wouldn't let anyone support me. That was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made. That is what people who love you do. They support you and love you. You do the same for others. I know you do because you are one of the ones on this board that it shows. You have a loving heart and you have no other choice but to be one of them. You get fulfillment from helping others and now it your turn to give others the gift of feeling fulfilled in helping you through this difficult time in your life.  I understand that money is tight. I know it is here too. You have to do what you have to do. I know one time I told my girlfriend that I know why they are called diets, it is because you die doing it. I just have to call it a new way of life. A new life for a new life. You have to think of things in the way that helps you. Sometimes you have to play mind games because that is how you have to get through things. Not all mind games are bad. They aren't bad if they help you to get through it.  Know that you are loved here. I am loved here warts and all. And let me tell you girlfriend I got a lot of ugly warts. We are here for you to help you through things when you need us. Just let us help you because that helps us to feel better. If you ever need me feel free to come to me. I am here for you day and night. If you need someone to talk to call me at 3 in the morning I don't care because in order to keep what I have I have to give it away. I am being selfish right now. lol Know that I love you and look forward to seeing you here for a long time. You are totally accepted here and I don't think you have Mad Cow you just have some normal confusion going on. Nothing that can't be fixed. Maybe you should talk to you doctor about this and he may be able to help you with some medication. I am so sorry if I ever said anything to offend you since that is not or never has been my intention. I am here to love and that is my main mission here on this earth. Know that I love you and accept you with all your warts too.   I am sending you love and hugs and there are no stings attached either. You got them even if you don't want them, sweetheart.