totally ashamed, finally admitting that i need help

Hey Laura,

You're not alone. I find that posting daily about what I'm eating and how I'm exercising keeps me active on the board and accountable. When I'm away from the board, I'm away from my support network and not following the plan.

Welcome Back!

Hi Laura,

No flames from me!  I'm in the same boat actually.  Way back in 2006, I struggled with my band being too tight and fought with so much tightness until this past summer when I had a total defill.  I gained back 80 pounds in all, and am only 20 pounds down from my all time high.  One thing I've learned is that keeping your band tight is never the answer, even though I somehow rationalized at the time that it would help me to lose weight...I was just so desperate I guess.

But being too tight for long enough just leads to bingeing when you finally can eat.  I was a yo-yo for a good 2 years.  So I've slowly been refilling the band, but still not following the rules well.  I figured I'd start following them as soon as I had some decent restriction.  But I've decided now to print out a couple copies of band rules and post them around the house.  I find coming back to the boards immensely helpful too.  It helps to be around like-minded people to remind us of our goals I find.

Good luck to you!  (and me too!) 

Kristin

Welcome back Laura and congrats on taking the first steps (1 - posting with us again and 2 - making an appt with your doc). You can do this ~ I'll be here to cheer you on! I'm up 20 lbs myself so let's kick this weight to the curb together.

Thanks for the post.  Maybe you can get into a support group and/or get some time in with a therapist as well?  I hope that I am not assuming too much when I say that for most of us weight/food issues are a symptom of other problems in our lives....stress, anxiety, etc.  Well, I know that's the case with me anyway! Best of luck! JC

I have BEEN there.  Folks really don't understand the emotional damage that an overfill can cause.  It always grates my nerves a bit when foks complain about how "little" a fill they get or when their doctors don't do what they expect.  Having gone through carrying a too tight fill for 5 months (and mine was BARELY too tight) I am a HUGE advocate for being conservative.  Between the gain from overfill and the "natural" weight gain from my pregnancy...I am at my surgical date weight.  I'm looking forward to getting back on track to using the band right again very soon.

Well you picked the perfect time to come back because there's a whole herd of us that went beserk over the holidays and are recommiting to success.I'm getting back on the ol' band wagon my self so forgive yourself and get on the wagon with us!

Welcome back and thank you for sharing your experience, it is good for us to hear the good the bad and the ugly.

Flame you? Never. You are only human and slips happen. I applaud you for the courage to come to the forum and admit that you have shortcomings. I have many and I've been less than perfect with the band.......
I left the forums for awhile thinking I really didn't need it, but we all do regardless of where we are on our journey. I came back.
Thank you for your post because we can all relate to what you are going through....
Deb

Hi Laura,

Welcome back!   No flames or medical advice from me.  Just a pat on the back from one bandster to another!   Coming back on the boards is a step in the right direction!  Good job!  :)

~Sam

Welcome back - No flames here - none of us are perfect and we all slip back into old habits at times. I am also recomitting after a very relaxed holiday season. You know what you need to do and are willing to kick yourself in the pants - that is the first step to getting back on track, and yes you will slip again but you're attitude will make you a success in the long run. Have fun on vacation and be totally honest with your doctor when you return.

You and the doc are a team and he is a big part of getting you where you need to be.