I can't really add anything to what the others have said.  I just want to extend my sympathy for what you are going through.  I pray that this might somehow be corrected.  I, too, have had the LAP-Band surgery and would definitely be concerned if this happened to me.  My prayers are with you!

I get a charlie horse type muscle pain about twice a year and it hurts horribly for several minutes but otherwise nothing.

You CAN go to another specialist who does WLS to have it checked.  New insurance regulations allows for this now thankfully.

Recovery was about the same time as when put in but less pain. I was eating regular food about a week out. They had me start on liquids then full liquids for a couple more days then soft, a couple of days and then regular as tolerated.

Mine used to pull and I was always numb in the area around it, I was told scar tissue caused the pulling and sometimes pain and nerve damage caused the numbness

That all sucks and that doctor should be reported.  You definitely need to get a second opinion. 

And DO NOT get the band refilled.  I understand that you are gaining, but the damage that can be done if you refill your band could make it were the band has to come out and you will no longer be able to get any other WLS.  Not worth risking it. 

Maybe take a look at the sleeve and bypass forums where they post "what are  you eating today".  It may help you to plan your meals so you can nip the gaining in the butt.  See what others are eating and how much of it they have at a meal.  Until you can get this figured out try tracking what and how much you eat daily.