Self Sabotage

Anyone experience Self Sabotage?

I have lost 77 pounds. I am 4 1/2 months out. I have a waist size that I thought I could reasonably get to already. For my weight goal I still have 45 more pounds to go. So I am obese and no longer morbidly obese. (Just figured that out)

My issue is that I find myself sabotaging myself at every turn. I am in a stall as well. (Could be due to extra snacks or not.)

I can not yet exercise due to an Achilles tendon issue. But hope to get past that in the next month to at least walking. I do however feel out of control in eating. I LOVE carbohydrates. My snacking is not way out there but does include a brownie or a piece of banana bread or two servings of soy chips. It seems to trigger my need to have that piece of candy or just MORE food. More than I am am actually hungry for. I just want to eat. Or just 'a drink' after dinner to calm me down and relax me.

I feel  that part of me just wants to be like I was. No fear of all the changes that looking and feeling go will bring. Like more attention and the need to get off my ass and start doing things around the house again. I am torn. I want these things but also am afraid.

I did this for my kids and for my health. I do not have any dire health risk to scare me into this. I do have my general health and kids to try and keep me motivated.

In the past I have managed to 'diet' for about the 4 -5 month mark but then I have always lost it and 'failed'. I feel like I am doing that again. Has any one else had this issue and how have you overcome this to keep moving forward?

I am looking both for ideas and a kick in the head. Anything to get me back to where I need to be.

You need some activities to keep you busy.  I know you mentioned an achillies problem, are you using that as an excuse for things that you could be doing?  Sitting around bored triggers my old bad habits, keeping busy keeps them at bay.  You need to make a new you, start today.

Look at my posts over the past week or click on my Latest Posts.  I've been starting to do behavior modification in light of my carb addiction and because I'm a compulsive eater.  I mentioned the book I've had for years and that I'm using now.  But, I posted on the Main Forum searching fo more current info.  A food addict who is also a therapist suggested that I get the Beck Diet Solution which is not a diet book. 

I ordered it on Amazon.com.  Basically, it provides a 6 week course to change our stinkin' thinking (my phrase) to thinking like a thin person.  I know you want your problem to be solved yesterday because that's how I feel.  But, if you are anything like me, you've been turning to food for many reasons other than nutrition for a long period of time.  If you are willing to change and put some effort into it, this sounds like a promising solution.  It's hard to believe that food is not the problem. 

You probably notice that many of our fellow men in our forum no longer think constantly about food.  I don't know if they shared our food addictions or eating practices.  Some men were morbidly obese because of the volume they ate at meals.  The WLS takes care of that but it doesn't take care of head hunger, food addiction, nor compulsive eating.

We sabotage because we have a fear of success, not failure. If we are successful and people do not like us or we don't get the job etc, we can't blame it on being fat. That's a hard concept to grasp.

Can you exercise while sitting in a chair. Do leg lifts etc.

Thanks Bobby . I do have to admit I have been using the foot as an excuse. When I am really honest with myself. Getting out of the house is definately a good idea. I have been cooped up for a long two months. I just started moving around more by myself. Hopefully I can step that up yet an other notch. ***focus Marc***

Snickle, got some exercises from my PT guy and have started them as limited as they are they are better than nothing. I am whining because I like to walk.

Bob I have been reading your posts and it is why I managed to put this into words and focus on changing. Thanks. I will take a look at that book and see what it has for me.

Dude, you will lose lots of weight once you start exercising regularly.  That alone will shock your body and set you off on losing again, but in the mean time, you are killing your progress because those extra calories are not being burned off - a little bit of that might be okay if you were burning 600-800 calories per day in the gym ( that is an average amount for me daily in the gym).  The surgery has definitely helped you not to retain as many calories, but even with the malabsorptive process going on, those extra carbs will add your weight back on.  If you are going to snack, better eat protein (beef jerky, deli meat, etc.). 

You need to do some kind of stationary bike where you can at least work your upper body with a kind of peddaling motion.  Most good gyms have those kind of bikes - not sure of the technical name, but it is specifically set up for those people who have bad knees, lower body problems.  Not exercising in some way, shape, or form is a cop out and an excuse.  There has got to be something you can do no matter what - even if it is just upper body stuff (swimming,benching, curls, dumbell work, triceps, isometric work)  .  There is a guy in my gym who is in a wheelchair (paralyzed from the waist down) and he works out like crazy - swims a lot.  You just have to do it and don't make excuses - you can always do something.

  I am not trying to get onto you personally, but I see too many people on this forum and even in my support group, who complain and make excuses about why they can't lose more weight or why the weight is not coming off.  Surgery is just a tool and the weight will only come off so much when you don't exercise.  Hell, we all probably lost 15-20 pounds before we left the hospital as postop RNY patients, if not then, at least within that first week while at home recovering.  If you don't exercise somehow, you will ultimately be doomed for failure, thus regaining weight = right the hell back to where you started in the first place.

Sometimes we all just need a swift kick in the ARSE to get right back on track.  I love that word ARSE - learned it from Bama Bob on the forum here.  I have seen him say it enough that it has rubbed of on me and become part of my vocabulary. 

Good luck, Taz

When you talk about the number of calories burned during exercise vs the amount consumed, you quickly see the need to control the intake.  When my brother did his first charity bicycle ride from Boston to NYC, he gained 5 lbs.  Most of us are not going to get that much exercise.

However, exercise is necessary for weight loss.  The general consensus is that we should have cardio and weight resistant exercise.

If you are a food addict or compulsive eater, you are probably aware of both of these points.  But you need to find a way to stop eating compulsively. 

Many men who have the WLS are not food addicts nor compulsive eaters.  They don't understand our problem.  They may have eaten too much before surgery, but those who are food addicts appreciate what anyone with any addiction has to deal with.  Personally, I can no longer eat large volumes of food, i.e., the pouch works.  But, the pouch does not cure an eating disorder such as compulsive eating or a food addiction.  Bob

Thanks Taz,

I needed that and probably others too. I see a good part of t is all in my head that I am fighting. I will find somethign to do. Actually got some core training to do from my physical therapist. I will add the bike back in as well.

I hear you too Bob. Carbs are NOT my friend.