It's me again...

Oh my goodness!!!!! That is about all I can say. You know, during those 3.5 years I was away from the temple I didn't think I was really missing that much in my life. Having only been the one time and being so nervous I don't really even remember much of it, I didn't realize how much I really was missing. I knew what everyone said about the feelings you have but I never KNEW, I mean REALLY KNEW, how it felt to bask in the warm glow of Heavenly Father's light and love. I also didn't realize the impact it was going to have on me emotionally. I definitely was not prepared emotionally for all the feeling inside of me. I walked up to the door and tried to open it, already starting to feel the tears well up under my eyes when to my horror, the door wouldn't open. Part of me felt like, "Well, see you weren't supposed to be here after all. You just aren't worthy!" Then (of course) I see the sign beside the door saying to push the button to be let in!! Standing there in the front, showing my temple recommend, I started crying. Full on--almost bawling! I couldn't believe that I was worthy to be standing in this Holy House of the Lord. For so long I had felt so unworthy, that is why it took me 3.5 years to make it back. All through changing my clothes and then waiting in the holding pen for the session to start, and of course all through the session I just weeped. I had so many emotions running through me...was I really worthy, or was I faking; did I really deserve to be here; feeling the love of the Lord; feeling the love for my husband who was there with me; nervous, happy, repentant, love, sorrow (for staying away so long) and the pride that Heavenly Father must be feeling knowing that one of his children has returned home. I just wanted to share this experince with you, with people that understand what it means to have these feelings. The really cool part is that today I got to teach the RS lesson about the natural man, and share my experience with my RS sisters about how good it felt to put aside the natural man and be in the presence of God. Thanks for listening to me. It feels so much better when you can share it with others. Have a great Sabbath Day!!!!!! Bren P.S. In case you were wondering, I am in Heidelberg, Germany and went to the Frankfurt, Germany temple.

Bren - Thanks for sharing. I'm so glad that you had a good experience. I hope you took the opportunity to go in the prayer circle. I'm so glad you told us that you were in Germany. I looked at your city/state and I couldn't figure out where you lived. I'm the curious type so I have some questions for you. Have you always lived in Germany? Are you there for your job or your husband's job? Is English your second language? Now for the temple. Is the session done in German or do they also have sessions in English? I'm so glad that you had a good experience. When you get the opportunity go through an initiatory session. That by itself will remind you of what you are promised and what you are capable of. Have a wonderful Sabbath, mine has been especially good. It was our High Council Sunday which is one of my favorite weeks. My other favorite is fast Sunday. I just love those two weeks of the month. Melody

Congrats on getting back to the temple! I can't wait to go back as it has been so long - about 12 years or so - I am seeing the bishop this week for a temple recommend. -Sherrie

Sherrie, Isn't it wonderful to think about going to the temple? I never realized how much I needed it until I went. Now I can't wait to go back. I was supposed to be going this next Saturday with the RS, but just found out today that the temple is going to be closed for the next two weeks...so, that means I can't go. I really wanted to go this next time because it will be the weekend right before my surgery, and what better place to be at that time?!! So, I guess I'll just have to wait until the next trip the last Saturday in Feb. I should be up and running by then and ready to spend the day there. Good luck on your temple recommend!! I always hear people talking about the feeling they bring home with them from the temple and I never really understood it. Right after leaving the temple I didn't necessarily feel a big change in myself (except that high of being in the house of the Lord) but later that night and the next day I really started feeling this wave of calmness and peace. In the last week my husband and I have not fought (with the exception of minor disagreements) and this is very out of the norm for us. We have a habit of having full-blown fights about the stupidest things. Instead he has been loving toward me. He wants to hold me at night and be near me, touching me. Usually he can't sleep if I am touching him or we are laying a certain way, but he has been either sleeping with his arms around me, or with his back smashed up against mine, so we can feel each other while we sleep. It has been such a great spiritual and emotional awakening for me. I hope to make a habit of going to the temple more regularly now and making use my recommend that has always just been hidden behind credit cards in my wallet. Again, good luck in your recommend. I hope you post and let us know if you got it. Don't feel bad if you don't feel like you are worthy to go to the temple right away. Just because I had a piece of paper saying I could go, didn't mean I really felt like I should be there. You will be ready soon and you shouldn't rush yourself and cheat yourself of all the good that will come from it. If you go too early you may have guilty feelings (I almost did) and then not be able to properly feel the spirit. I am so happy for you. Bren