Is it the Spirit or is it me?

Hi and Happy Mothers Day! I have been researching WLS for about a year and a half now. I think I pretty well know what I'm getting myself into. I was discussing the surgery with a neighbor of mine and she tells me of this horrible story of a friend of a friend (of course) who had a bowel obstruction and lost so much of his bowel that he is now on a permanent pic line to get his nutrients in. Then, stupid me, I go on the WLS complications messageboard and read all the horror stories there. Now I'm scared to death. I'm also confused. You see I've spent a lot of time praying about this and I feel pretty good about my decision. But when I start thinking about these people who have had horrible, tragic results I get really anxious. When I don't think about these people, when I think of me having the surgery and what I think my life will be like, I get really excited and I feel very happy and, well, like I'm about to be paroled from prison and can finally stand in the sun again. So, when I feel anxious is that the Spirit? I've always had trouble recognizing the Spirit, unless of course it's a lightening bolt out of the sky type of prompting. How did all of you get your assurance. Did anyone go through the fear that I am experiencing. Also, so far everything seems to be falling into place. I would think that if this wasn't right for me and my family then there would be obstacles after obstacles. Someone help me out here please? Lynda D.

Lynda, I didn't fear for my health because of the surgery. I feared not having it. Remember the spirit will give you answers after you have pondered the situation in your heart, made a decision, and prayed about it. That is what I did. It sounds like you did the samething. You said you felt good about your decision after you prayed about it and that things have fallen into place to have it. To me that is an answer to the affirmative. The hollow, sad, and horrible feelings are that of fear. Remember where fear comes from. I cannot say I was not afraid, but I had to focus on what I was doing was for my benefit. Remember, Satan does not have a body. He wants us to hate ours and to not take care of it. If we start to do something about improving our body and our lives do you think he will stand aside? No he won't. I wish you the best with surgery. It is a decision that you will not regret. -Jonathan

Hi Lynda, Yes this is a difficult decision. We have a lot to lose if things go wrong. Most of us are moms or dads and we fear the thought of dying prematurely because we wanted a sure way to lose weight, we dread and fear the thought of leaving our children whom we have been entrusted by our Heavenly Father to raise. At least for me I thought that if I died because of this surgery I wouldn't have kept my first estate. Yes there can be complications. Yes, people can die from having this surgery but we can also die anytime we get into a car and drive whether we are the driver or passenger. For me I knew that I was shortening my life by being so obese and therefore NOT doing what I needed to do to raise my family. I prayed about this decision for several years before finally having my surgery. Here is a scripture that helped me: D&C 9:8-9 8. "But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then your must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right. 9. But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stuper of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; . . ." Pray about it Lynda. You'll know if it's right for you to have this surgery. Good luck, Melody

I know that if I'm living my life right then things will turn out for the best. When I think back on my life I can pinpoint time after time where I've been warned, where I've been protected, where I've had trouble even, but the trouble has been for my own good, has been as a refining fire for me. So I believe that I will be ok but still I fear, can't help it. I also know that after the trial of faith is when the blessings come in. I've seen it in my life many, many times. Gotta work on that faith thing. Thanks for the scripture Melody. I had an experience once where we were going to sell our house and build or buy a bigger one. Our current home was bulging we had outgrown it so much. We were thinking seriously of building in a new subdivision that was going up in Spanish Fork, Utah. I prayed about our decision then, a few minutes later, I went back to doing my housework. While I was doing my work I started thinking about building a home in this new neighborhood and how we would work out the financing and all the logistics, etc., etc. All of a sudden I felt completely confused. I just couldn't think straight. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't get my mind to stay focused on what I was thinking and everything seemed so muddled to me. Talk about a classic example of having a stupor of thought! Naturally we didn't build in Spanish Fork. Thanks all, for your answers. Good point on Satan wanting us to hate our bodies, hadn't thought of that. Hope you all have a fantastic Mother's Day! Lynda D.

Lynda, I was doing very well and very secure about my decision to have WLS. Then I started hearing stories....ones that scared me out of my wits. I almost backed out 4 days before surgery. Then I talked to a lady in the Stake that had surgery 10 years ago. One of the stories was about a young man in her Ward that had died. I was told that he died because of the WLS but actually he died 5 years after surgery and it had nothing to do with WLS. I talked to her for about 2 hours. She explained to me that having WLS has its risks. But that the risks are no more or greater then any other abdominal surgery. I had already had 5 Csections and a hysterectomy. I came through those very well. That convinced me and I felt much better. I still was nervous...even as I was wheeled into surgery, but I'm so glad I didn't back out. I hope that helps Christy