Thank you Gala for your support. I have a hard time talking about this and this board is someplace a little bit annonymous where I can go spill by guts, cry and get the loving support that everyone offers. There is a real fear that my nephew will commit suicide. We did not cause it if it happens. That's something out of our control and we are NOT going to take responsibility if it happens. We've gone out of our way not to show anger or hatred toward this boy. We've repetedly told him we love him. What he does at this point is his responsibility. I'm not going to harbor any guilt over it. If my sister and my nieces blame me and hate me, that's their problem. I'm not going to give in to Satan's traps. Hopefully this young boy will be too chicken to take the easy way out with suicide. He's a baptized, inactive member of the church, his eternal salvation is at stake. For the first time in his life he'll have to take responsibility for his actions whether in this life or in the next. Hopefully he can feel our love for him and will accept responsibility for his actions now. Thanks for listening (or reading) and for all the support. Love, Melody

My two youngest daughters (4 years old and 6 years old) have been repeatedly raped by a trusted cousin. The other grandmother has the beginnings of Lou Gehrigs Disease. My mother told her of the impending arrest of her grandson thinking that it would be better to give her a little notice instead of receiving the shock of the news of his arrest. She also asked the grandmother to please not say anything that the police didn't want the perpetrator to get word of the impending arrest. Well to make a long story short, the other grandmother told her adult children and also the perps father (her son). They showed up at our house at midnight wanting to put these allegations to rest. We first let the father read the statements we made to the police, he then handed the papers (which were multiple) to the perp. The father (My brother in law) kept saying over and over "I'm sorry, I'm sorry". The perp read the first page and threw it on the floor, he then took every other page, looked at it for less than 5 seconds and threw each page on the floor without reading any of it. The perp kept saying over and over "They're lying, I didn't do nothing". We kept assuring the perp that we loved him, he was family and he needed help, when one member of the family has a problem we all rally around and try to get them help, the same as if it was cancer or another disease. The perp never looked at us. Most of the time he was sulking and not cooperative. Their visit only lasted about 12 minutes (good thing as they didn't arrive until midnight and they got us out of bed). The perp stormed out the door slamming it on his way out. The father hugged me and told me he was so very sorry. The next day their adult daughter (the perps sister) decided that they should have a jury trial and all they had to do was plant a seed of doubt in the jury's mind and her brother would go free. This daughter has decided that my husband our daughter's father is the one who has done these horrible acts to these girls. They are going to place all the blame on him and plant this seed of doubt in the jury's mind. She said that my girls were coaxed into saying what they said. I went back to the investigating police office and asked him what he thought. This officer laughed and said that it was sooo obvious that these girls were not coaxed, they were very spontaneous in their answers and there was absolutely no question that they perp really was the perp and did these horrible acts to my daughters. He told us not to worry about this. The good news is that the girls also underwent a physical exam with professionals who deal with this type of molestation, There is absolutely no permanent damage done to either girl. They assured me that in 98% of the cases of children this age there will be no permanent damage. My girls are being checked for a venereal disease but everything looked good on exam. This is turning as ugly as we feared. It is tearing our family apart. We still love the perp and his family. We pray daily for them that they will accept and take responsibility for this so he can get the help he needs. Melody

Thank you Kaye. I couldn't believe the amount of peace I've received since learning of this situation and going through the legal process. I don't feel hatred for this family member who's responsible, I just feel peace. I have learned that our names were put on the temple prayer list. I KNOW that is why I haven't been an emotional wreck all week. Tomorrow the children will go for their interview as well as their medical evaluation. I made a point of going to the temple today. I just felt that I needed to be there. There is such peace involved when I should be a wreck. The biggest hurdle I'm overcoming now is - We've been told by Law Enforcement, social services as well as the ones that will do the evaluation that we are NOT to talk to the girls about this incident. They don't want anyone talking to them before the official evalution. My 4 year old keeps bringing it up. SHE has the need to talk it out. I feel horrible and feel like I'm letting her down by changing the subject and not addressing her needs. I don't want to jeorpordize the investagation and yet I want to address my daughter's need to talk. Tomorrow, (Thursday), after the evaluations maybe I'll get the green light to actually talk this out with my daughter. Melody

The first person we called after learning of this incident was our bishop. He came right over and has called several times since then to just check on us and make sure we are ok. Our home teacher is wonderful. He saw us as church the next morning and could tell and sensed that something was amiss in our lives. He'll be a HUGE support for us too. We've been to the police and filed all the paperwork. The Chief of Police was great. He told me that WE were not pressing charges against my nephew - HE was pressing charges against the boy. All we did was report an incident. I guess this is one way for us to handle the emotional backlog of pressing charges against a family member. I think this will be a blessing in disguise because it will FORCE my nephew, his family and his mother to get the counciling and help that they so desperately need. I sure appreciate all the support I have been given on this site. I had no idea that this problem was so prevelent. I guess I've lived a sheltered life because this type of thing happens to OTHER people, not to my family. Thanks Lynn Melody

Hi Melody I know you are doing everything you possibly can to go through this with Heavenly Fathers help. I can't help but in my minds eye see Him with tears in his for what has happened. It constantly amazes me how one persons actions can effect so many people for good or in this case definetly for bad. I wish I could be there just to give you a hug. Your journey on this road has just begun and I wish I knew how to help. You are in my prayers. I have read the other post to you and I'm just heart sick at how many are molested. What a terrible thing to deal with as the victim and also the parent of someone who has been so terribly attacked. I will keep you in my prayers and your little ones as well..and DH too. take care and keep in touch please love ya Alfie