Okay, I have quite a bit to say about this. I am very familiar with your story, Melody. As things were unfolding, I sat at this very computer and cried for you several times. I was also EXTENSIVELY sexually abused as a child (8 different people, all before I was 13), so this really hits home. I have tried for years to "forgive", but I'm not sure if I ever can. At least I don't want these people to die with pain anymore. That's probably as close to forgiveness as I'll get in this lifetime. That's just one way in which I couldn't be any farther away from being Christlike. I say you do what you can do. This was still a relatively short time ago for you and your girls. I'm 35...this was all more than 20 years ago and it still hurts like hell. Ya know what I mean? As far as the wedding goes, you are not going to like my answer, but please think about it. You don't have to take the advice...just hear (read) me out. I think it's a terrible idea for you to go to the wedding. I know you love your sister, I know you love your niece (and yes, you love your nephew). I know you want to share in this happy day. BUT.... I feel like your presence there will cause tension for the immediate family (especially the bride). They will be nervous, they will be uncomfortable, and I'm concerned about the feelings that you may experience when you see this young man. How will it make your dear niece feel if you take one look at her brother and run out of the room crying? This isn't fair. It's not fair that you have to suffer for someone elses sin and crime, but you do. I've been on this board for a few years and read enough of your posts to know that you are a kind hearted and gracious lady. Use these 2 traits to get you through this, Melody. I think you need to sit this one out. You said your weren't invited...I'm sure for the reasons I've mentioned. That doesn't mean that they don't love you, but it's easier to exclude an aunt than a brother. Also...you've said that they lie for him...they probably feel guilty and don't want to face you or their guilt on this special day. Please consider showing your love and respect by not attending, but sending a gift or even just a card that expresses your love and good wishes (and mentions NOTHING about the situation). I know that this is not what you were hoping for, but these are my deep down gut feelings.

A couple years ago my two young daughters were raped and molested by their beloved cousin (my nephew). This young man was arrested and plea bargained down from 8 felony charges to only 2 felony charges. He only spent 3 days in jail and his probation will last another 2 years. He is now 17 years old and is a registered sex offender. His sexual evaluation performed by a therapist of HIS choosing stated that he is at moderate to high risk of re-offending. He repeatedly violates his probation. I have reported these violations and his family lies and protects him. I honestly feel that this young man is sorry he got caught NOT sorry for his actions - but that is another story. Now for the topic of my post. Through a lot of prayer, I really thought that I had forgiven this young man for what he did to my daughters. His sister, my niece, is getting married this week. Although I was not given an invitation to the wedding or reception, I was going to go along and extend my best wishes for their marriage to my niece. I know that her brother (the sex offender) will be there. My little girls WILL NOT be going. I was really fine with the possibility of seeing this nephew again but the closer the wedding gets, the more apprehension I have. I'm still feeling some hatred toward seeing this young man. Obviously I haven't truely forgiven this young man. I guess I have forgiven him from a distance but the thought of seeing this young man is really bothering me. I have a lot of love for my sister (the young man's mother) and her other children. So I would really like to go and see them. I'm just having a hard time dealing with coming face to face with the offender. Any suggestions on how I can completely forgive this young man? I just had to vent. - Melody

I'm SO excited! I'm getting it monday. Check this out! http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=180104693331&ssPageName=ADME:B:EF:US:2

Cute, I hadn't heard many of them before. Thanks for the smile. I'm off to view General Conference via satelite at our ward building. I could get it on my computer, the TV or the radio but I like to sit in the chapel and watch because there are no disruptions and I'm more likely to pay attention. Melody

I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. Garden Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to? In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?" Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt ." If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?