Linda, your words of wisdom reminded me that I've always been taught. The church is perfect but the people aren't. If we keep that in mind and do not allow ourselves to let any other person keep us from obtaining eternal life, how much better we will be. Melody

What a great story or tithing. I grew up in the Boise area and now live in the Portland area. Funny you mention both in your post. I have many fond memories of the Bosie temple and Boise people when I ws there and for sure love the temple here in Portland. Good Good Story Barbara Hansen

You know dear I would call you Dr. and ask them. You will get dehydrated very soon. I was in 3 or 4 times after my surgery because I got dehydrated and I wasn't sick like you. Take Care!!! Glad to hear you are home. And hopefully on the mend very very soon. Gala

Cindy H. made the following comments: "I have one regret. That I didn't speak up to the Stake President about what I knew. I knew he was meeting the woman secretly because he told me. I knew that he flirted with me. It was a strain on my own marriage because my husband knew it too and he thought I was a willing participant. But when it finally resolved itself and things worked out, we survived. The Bishop's wife left him and ultimately remarried and is very very happy. He on the other hand has not returned, is a miserable soul and bitter. The RS president stayed married, continued to deny that anything went on and they moved clear across the country to MN. " "We did move away from that Ward. I purposely choose to not get involved in clicks and groups socially that way. It leads to trouble. I'm very faithful about going to church, fulfilling my callings and interactin with other members. I just don't join in private parties or activities because they lead to hurt feelings. I never want to go through that again." Cindy, I always find this kind of knowledge such a burden, as I am sure it must have been for you. But, at the same time I always wonder if I might be the one being manipulated with a tidbit of information. Such as this man telling you he was meeting this woman, in an effort to encourage you to have an affair with him. Even during the times over the years that I was aware of situations "where something just wasn't right" my first reaction was just to protect myself. I always felt that if I spoke up, I was being judgmental! Regarding Social Groups and Cliques, we are having problems with a woman in our Branch over this very thing. She always wants to have her own social gatherings, with selected people in an effort to make her self look good so to speak. And it is actually turning out to be kind of pitiful. She of course has a lovely old Victorian Home, and collected memorabilia from all over the world. But has a husband *****fuses to pay attention to her, and won't even stay home with her and told the Branch President that he would not stay home with her even after retiring. She has grown children that have pretty much written her off. My 28 year old daughter was kind of taken into her web, for a period of time, until dear daughter began to realize what was happening, and I too didn't realize how many problems this woman had for some time. This sister has a pedophile son, who was recently released from prison. So of course we have to watch the children in the Branch extra carefully. We have a small primary, and a phase 1 building, but do not even let our children go to the restroom on their own. As this man tends to walk the halls. We frequently find our Branch President supervising the halls as well. Our Branch President is about 6'4" and probably weights close to 300 lbs. We can hope it makes him intimidating. LOL You are so correct about dividing into cliques and the like, so many times ADULTRY is the end result. My parents must have learned some of that in their early days, because I know that they encouraged us to participate in priesthood authorized activities only growing up. In fact we hardly even had activities that were not directly church related. Well except the occasional slumber party in a neighborhood or some such. But that was actually about the extent of it. In spite of our best efforts, it is easy for us to run up against negatives in the Gospel, and I suppose we can never be too vigilant. I suppose the best advice for myself and anyone else, is just what the Brethren have always said, and of course that is to be on our guard! Having been an Army Wife, I like Kaye have lived in many states, stakes, wards, and branches, and seen a wide range of "Goings On" so to speak. But, the Lord always has a way of putting things right back on track! And as we all have agreed, it happens in his time and his way. Linda in Texas P.S. who just realized she is sermonizing.

Oh Daph....I too don't have any magical words that will make the pain go away. You logically know all the right things about the plan of salvation, but it doesn't make the emotional loss go away. Time will help...get involved in service to others....perhaps in a totally different area then what was going on with Nolan. Don't delve into the same illness that took him. Maybe volunteer working at a local school or library. Perhaps a nursing home. I don't know...but I do know that getting into the thick of helping and working, helps. Maybe you could request becoming a Stake Missionary would help you with teaching the gospel that is always healing. Kisses and hugs to you. There is no bargaining this one away...which already said. You're perhaps still in the stage of grief of loss and anger....maybe trying to move toward acceptance will get you through faster. Christy