New to this forum

Hello, It has been about a week since I have visted OH and back then I came across a response to my post of a non-surgical forum here.  So, here I am.   I am going through all the hoops to have an RNY but in case my insurer does not approve me it is good to get a bigger support net as I feel so desperate.  So, can anyone drop me a line and say hi and tell me your story.  Please explain why you did not go through with surgery or why you did not consider it.   I am considering WLS because it is the last resort as I feel like I can never stay on target long enough to keep the weight loss going.  I am like so many people --a yo-yoer.  I am at the point now that I have many co-morbidities and now the joint pain is slowing down my fitness level in spite of losing 38 pounds since August on my own.  Plus my sleep apnea and insomnia is worsening.  All this makes me feel more committed to the WLS plan but just in case I can't I will need all the help I can get.  One more thing and I will probably post this on the WLS board as well but, does anyone have an opinion they can offer about the OA 12 Step Program?  I went to 4 meetings and  because the focus is so intensly on the Higher Power my sense of shame and guilt about my food addiction hightened. Anyway, I welcome your input. Puff to Buff

Hi Puff, My name is Patience. I to  have done the yo-yo dieting all my life.  My hubby had VSG last week and we self paid ($11900.00) Big ouch but his life in desperate need of the surgery.  My insurance does not cover and we cannot afford another chunk of change like that. So with that said I have decided to do his diet with him with a different attitude this time. You see I go to another 12 step program  (AA) 13 yrs sober  - not proud, but grateful. You see that program taught me that my higher power loves me with all my faults. Couldn't get more ashamed than being an overweight alocholic. Well, I slowly learned that these people were not here making fun of me but understood exactly where I was coming from. Didn't think about OA until just recently when a friend mentioned she wanted to go.  You see the theme in ALL 12 steps programs is Trust God, Clean House, & Help Others.  If you want to PM me you are more than welcome. God Bless you and Keep You

Hello, Three years ago I was 31 years old and weighed 320 lbs.  If that wasn't enough to jolt me into action, being excluded from a function at work that I worked very hard to put together did.  I didn't look into surgery right away because I have been overweight most of my life, and I knew my insurer would be looking for some type of diet history.  So I decided to really try for one year to lose and if that didn't work, then I would start looking into surgery. Over the next nine months, I lost about 12 lbs.  Then my job started a Weigh****chers At-Work Program.  By the time my year was up I had lost about 25 lbs total and I decided to give WW another six months.  The At-Work program only lasted six months, so I found another meeting near home.  Since joining WW two years ago I have lost another 129 lbs, for a total of 141. I am currently at my lowest weight since junior high (yes, I was a big girl then, LOL).  I figured I was going to have to have surgery sooner or later since my family has so many heavy people and several others had already opted for surgery. Photos are in my profile.  Welcome to the boards and best of success!

I've chosen not to have WLS for several reasons but these are the most prominent.  Even with WLS you still have to change your diet and exercise routines long-term. Granted the surgery kinda forces you to do this but if you don't make the mental change eventually it will fail. Just like with any weight-loss plan.  For me, it's all mental. I've changed a lot of things in my life through self-discipline. This is just one more of those things I have to change about myself.  I want to be able to say I did this without WLS and carry that chip on my shoulder. Not to poke fun at those who have chosen WLS but rather to show those who cannot have WLS that they can still reach their goal without feeling miserable from dieting. Also, WLS costs a LOT of money and I would rather put that money into any plastic surgery I might need after losing the weight. I'm also afraid that the surgery might not work and I will have wasted the money because I relied on the surgery to be a fix-all miracle and I didn't change my ways. WLS is a great tool, but I've filled my toolbox with other tools. If my tools don't work, I'll buy a second tool-box and fill with bariatrics. :) I, like you, have issues with the whole spirituality of overeaters anonymous. I have chosen to join a local TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) chapter. They do not focus on a higher power but rather on enthusiasm, competition, group support, and rewards for progress. There aren't many men in my group but that's just how it goes for men. Most men are too 'manly' to attend a support group full of women. Ohh well, their loss. Personally I like being surrounded by women!  Check them out, I'm sure there's a chapter in your area too. They've been around a LONG time. I know you'll enjoy this much more! http://www.tops.org 

Hi puff (cute name!) Please read my profile for a little more on my bulimia issues.  I got better by going to OA. The shame and guilt about food takes a while to "go away", in many cases, it never goes away completely. I realized thru my personal inventory (cleaning house as Patience put it - love that!) that if i worked my program, got discipline to be abstinent (or don't eat foods off my plan), those negative feelings would be under wraps.  Shame and guilt, by the way, DO have a function - they are there to help you find homeostasis - your body is trying to "tell you something" via those feelings. Think of them as the Unconscious trying to ***** slap you! Your Higher Power wants the best for you - but there is a system called Rational Recovery (not affiliated with OA) that does not use the whole higher power concept.  I still possess a character flaw called hardheadedness - when i don't do what is right for my body, I am trying to be mistress of my own destiny and eat what I want.  That's why the yo - yo stuff. I need to get humble, stay humble and follow the advice of others who know how to get to the right size and stay there. The rules DO apply to me. About surgery:  I got rejected.  Lower bmi - ~37 when I began looking into wls.  The local surgeon said I was not a good candidate, same as my doc. I am not fighting city hall at this point.  I am putting on my big girl panties and doing what I know works without griping about it.  Truth is, i would have to all this stuff with surgery.  So....????? Welcome!

Neecee, the huggies pull-ups really aren't big girl panties!  I know! I know the commercials say they are but sweetie, they're just not.  Maybe you can go to wal-mart and get you some of the barbie panties without the absorbent material?   Uh ohh!!      

ya better run, ya little ****my knees are in good shape still!

hahah! Mine aren't, that's why I hopped on the horse! Hopefully my fat ass doesn't break its back!  :O

Welcome aboard!  I can't even go on with how many times I've dieted and on how many plans I've done.  Long story short, I'm having surgery the day after tomorrow.  So I'm not much of an inspiration.  Regardless, welcome to our forum!

Don't say that Janina. I beleive you are doing the righ thing. lapband is an honest way to do business. I am with you Girl!