Ramblings frtom a sick mind

I have done really well since having my RNY. Best decision I ever made. Since i have hit goal I realised some things. As has been mentioned on the forum before they rearranged my innards not my mind. Like many people my childhood was a mess of emotional and physical abuse. I self soothed with food. My adulthood was a continuation of every time something went wrong there was food for comfort.

I realised recently that in my rush to get the surgery I never really faced my demons and dealt with them. I went to the psychologist and told them all and yes they mentioned that I was pretty well adjusted for having survived my childhood. But still I did not deal with it.

I am now going to see a good doctor at TWH. She will help me deal with emotions without making food the answer. I walked back to work and reflected that since weight loss it isn't just the food I now have an issue with but spending money on clothes. Yes I need clothes but I really need to look at the fact right now I can't afford more.

I am sharing this because for those of you who have sought help I commend you. For those of you going for surgery consider if you need help starting now to deal with your issues. For those of you on the journey it is never to late to ask for help

Actually Pat - it sounds like a pretty healthy  mind to me.....good for you for recognizing and taking action

Thanks. It took a lot of work to get to where I am and I live in fear of gaining. I will do whatever it takes to take control. after all I am a bit of a control freak! Lol

Pat, I love this post. Not because you're in a place where you're asking for help, but because you're recognizing that you need to talk to someone. I spent many years convincing myself that I was "okay" - and I promise you, that can only work for a finite amount of time. I had a very hard time coming back from the bad choices I made when that house of cards all fell down, believe me - and I wouldn't wi**** on anyone. 

(((HUGS))) to you, lady. I wish you the very best, and hope you look back on this decision as the second best you ever made. 

Thanks I have tried to deal with it before but I think I am finally in the right head space to do it

Thats the key Pat. The time has to be right for you . I did it too Pat. And this last time was the right time for me. I finally was ready. You should be proud of yourself hun...Take care Krista..

Good for you. 

I am a big proponent on dealing with head issues  our eating is often a way to cope with life, to dull our senses or as a sort of escape.  

Thanks for sending out this important message.  Good for you for seeking support. 

I wish you well. 

Dawn

I just started readin a book 50 ways to soothe yourself without food. It talks about the numbing of food.

That sounds interesting - I should take a look at that - thanks for the title.  I'm finding the food-for-comfort thing emerging a bit even now, and it's a little disturbing.

Thanks Pat for your post and honesty and like you say it is never to late to ask for help.