Why do some RNYers look so....sickly? Facial changes after massive weight loss (PICS!)

I think it's really important to share our journeys to help others, and as outspoken as I am, this one is hard for me to share. Be kind, people! This could be you one day! :)
-------------------------------------------------------
I always prided myself on having a pretty nice face. Even as an SMO woman, I think I put myself together quite nicely. Unfortunately, as my weight started to take a toll, and I felt unwell, my face started declining quickly-- and after weight loss, it's more or less crashed.

Our faces are supported by pads of fat. Round, fat faces are part of our ideal, and when the fat stores leave, just as with the rest of our bodies, the skin doesn't snap back. It hangs, and under it we develop dark ridges and shadows, deep naso-labial folds, and a hanginess (turkey wattle!) around our necks and chins.

In a lot of ways-- it can feel like the ultimate betrayal-- you feel the best you have in your entire life, but your face ends up looking ravaged!

What can you do? Staying hydrated can only help, as can taking your supplements, and sunscreen-- but the truth is, even with all the moisturizer in the world you just may end up looking pretty darn fatigued. Myself, I really struggled with this, but have ultimately decided to undergo reconstructive facial plastics-- which is the last thing I ever thought I would ever hear myself say. I've never been particularly vain-- I just can't bear the thought that people see me as sickly and somehow at a loss, when I am feeling my best ever-- too ironic, and too unkind.

I will likely be having two surgeries-- a lower lid blepharoplasty to correct the sagging empty undereye skin, and a mini-lift, which I hope will lessen the double and triple folds beside my nose (only visible when I smile, which I sadly stopped doing) and hopefully tighten my chin/neck a tad. This will set me back $7000+...and I have no idea where I am going to get it from, but I finally gave myself permission-- if only so people will stop asking, "Are you okay?"

So here's a heads up-- you might feel terrific but end up with a face that's less than you'd hoped-- so prepare, and save a few pennies, and don't feel guilty if you have to have it corrected-- in my case, this is the result of a 208 pound loss-- it's truly reconstructive, and-- well-- something I have to come to grips with.

(And no, I don't go out looking quite this bad-- I'm handy with a brush!)

Thanks for sharing that.  I used to wear make-up but through the years I stopped fixing myself up.  I keep telling myself that after my surgery(preop visit Dec 3) I will take better care of my face.  I guess I never really thought my face would change much.  I just talked to both of my nieces who work for Mac Cosmetics and told them they now have a new canvas to work on.  And then they will have to teach me how to do it myself.

I never wore make up until after I had surgery and lost a lot of weight.  Now I am a regular at the Clinique counter.  I am 51 years old so all I can really do is make myself look more put together.  I have bags under my eyes but other than that I am lucky that my face and neck are pretty taught for a broad my age. 

Plastic surgery skeeeers me. I don't want it..... ever.

So far I've been lucky.... but I'm starting to hate the beginning of a turkey wattle under my chin. Some days I'm told that my face is absolutely colorless, but unless my latest stall isn't a stall but "the end" .,.. I still have a ways to go.

Let us know when you're going to get the slice-n-dice.... be fascinating to understand the procedure and see the before/during/afters.

I looked really good at 6-10 months out-- it wasn't until after I got under 190 or so that it started making me look kinda sickly. Tell your face to stop now!

ETA: I am not looking forward to it-- never thought it'd happen to me, or it'd matter. But it does.

Can I tell the boobage to stop melting too?

*conversation with body parts follows*

FACE: Your job is done, no more losing weight, keep up with the program.
BOOBS: Like FACE your job is done, you are hereby ordered to hold on to every ounce of fat left.
PANNI: You're doing a great job, just keep on going
THIGHS: You're slacking, you need to pick up the pace, take the pounds the boobs and face aren't losing, and LOSE em.
BUTTOCKS: Slow down a bit, and stop stealing fat from the tailbone area, or I'm never gonna use you again.

*end conversation*

There, now I'm all set.

You tell 'em!

I love how you are BOLD in bringing up topics others would rather ignore or brush under the carpet.  I think you're beautiful!  and I'll think you're beautiful after your surgery too!  Thank you for showing us what can happen, and being unabashedly brave in doing so!  I think I will still prefer "LOOKING sickly" but BEING healthy anyday!  You're our inspiration!

Of course I prefer being healthy...and it's easy to say that, but when every person you meet says, "Hey, look look like hell-- are you alright?" it really does get kinda old. Does anyone really want to come out of this looking worse? 'Course not!

Shari, I've been considering the same thing.  The difference between you and me pre-op though -- I that I was not as attractive as you.  I know this sounds harsh, but I had kind of a piggy look -- the way my fat was distributed on my face made my eyes look pretty beady. 

I do have more pronounced n-l folds and have started the looking-in-the-mirror-pulling-my-skin-back-to-see-what-plastics-would-look-like.  I do have a fairly impressive turkey wattle but it doesn't bother me too much.  I want plastics too but likely will start below the neck as that is where things are really bothering me now.

I will be fascinated to see your plastics journey, I've watched Terri's quite closely. 

Go for it gehl!