Can't Stop Crying

Had my surgery on the 27th (5 days ago) and can't seem to stop crying.  I feel like I'm completely out of control of my feelings. 

I take celexa(sp?) for my anti-depression and missed three doses (day of surgery and next two days).  Could that be the culprit?

Also - according to the scale this morning - I've lost 20 lbs in 5 days - is that even possible?

I'm getting about 4 cups of water in a day (can't seem to get in more)
I'm getting in about 40 gm of protein (not the 80 recommended to me)

Help - Do these panic feelings go away?

Not sure, may just be from the anestesia.  It makes me weepy.  Keep your chin up, it gets better.

Hi Lauren.....

I have been on an emotional rollarcoaster since my RNY on 6/8/09.   I have cried so much in the past couple of months.  Don't forget - not only are we not turning to food anymore, our hormones are going crazy.  Also, you are recovering from surgery.  You are tired and weak, so that will affect your emotions too.   I also suffer from panic/anxiety disorder.

You are not alone.  Having RNY is a very emotional as well as physical experience.  For me, it has forced me to get in touch with the feelings that I had stuffed down with food in the past.

HUGS.....

Thanks Michelle.  Were you crying in the mornings like me?  How long before you felt your mental/emotional clarity come back?  (or at least 80/20)

Ok.... just take a deep breathe and relax.  So far, everything seems completely normal. 

First - celebrate the 20lbs.  That's amazing.  If you do't lose another single pound all month, you're already at the typical average loss for the first month post-op.  But also expect that the scale is going to stop and you'll experience the typical 2-3 week stall - that's normal too.  Your body is going to be a bit crazy these first several weeks, so don't be too surprised at what the scale says.

Hormones -- estrogen is produced and stored in fat cells.  And right now as you're losing weight so rapidly all that estrogen is being evicted from it's home and looking to cause trouble in the neighborhood.  So you're going to have some pretty extreme mood swings for the next little while.  This will level off a few months from now as the weight loss finds its groove.  But right now, things are haywire.  But think of it as a GOOD thing.  Those crazy emotions are a direct result of weight loss -- which is exactly what we ordered up, right?

Medication --  after WLS the medication we take is malabsorbed just like the food we eat.   Here's a study that shows which meds are not fully absorbed.  Print a copy and take it to your doctor -- he may need to adjust your dose to accomodate your new plumbing. 

Water & Protein -- give yourself a break, you're only 5 days post op and to be getting that much already is pretty amazing.  You can only do what you can do ... and tomorrow, try to do a little bit better. 

Relax.  Enjoy the journey.  This is the best time of your life -- definitely hard and a lot of work, but it's an amazing ride! 

Pam

Thanks Pam for your encouraging words.  They mean a lot to me.  Thank you for your kindness as well. 

Fortunately, I've been up a few hours now and I'm a bit more rational and less teary eyed.  But, I am going to print out your reply and read it tomorrow when I am gasping for air through the tears.

I hope to feel better each day that passes.

Lauren

Dear Lauren,

I think you're doing great.    I had my surgery on the same day and instead of losing, I gained 13 lbs.  I've now lost about 5 of those lbs and have been pretty depressed about that (even though I know the logical reasons for the weight gain).     The only med that I was allowed to go back on was my wellbutrin when I got home.   You should probably talk to your doctor about it but I would think that if you've started back on the meds, they should be back in your system in no time.      You're doing great on the liquids / protein as well.    It takes time to get through this.........and I keep telling myself anyway, I didn't wake up fat, I'm sure not going to wake up skinny........now when you see the thread from me in the next day or so about why I've not lost the weight.......remind me of this okay? 

 

 The emotional part of this journey is a huge part of it. I missed my meds while I was in the hospital and got loopy from that - and yes, it does take a few days to get back on track with those meds - which can make us dizzy, cranky, disoriented and just feel "not right". Other than the general discomfort of withdrawl from my antidepressant during those days, I didn't have problems with my depression immediately post-rny, but it did crop up about 3 months later. I have been on antidepressants since 1995, and have been on effexor for the past 2 years - it has been a godsend. Nonetheless, it's still possible to get down even with our medications. I had my surgery in December, and a few months later after losing a significant amount of weight, I began to realize that "hey, the weight loss doesn't solve all my problems like we all think it will". I have learned to identify the real problems and have had to deal with them (since I can't cover them up with food now). And, I am feeling much better now after recognizing this.

Hormones play a huge part in depressive feelings after RNY - after much reading and research, I learned that as we burn fat, we also ignite stored hormones that can play with our emotions. It's okay. Everyone goes through some form of this in a range of intensities (some don't experience this as much as others). I think you are doing great and you're going to be fine. We have to mourn our old friend, food, and some folks even experience "buyers remorse" at the beginning of their journey. It's ok. This is natural and normal and will pass quickly... 

I'm here for ya girlfriend, and I know that this seems so overwhelming at times, but it will get better and you will get through this. Celebrate the victory of your weight loss, embrace your new lifestyle and focus on all the positives you have to look forward to. You've got some amazing WOW moments coming your way in the next months - this journey is amazing and transformative in so many ways.

Positive thoughts, support and well wishes heading your way....