I sorta need advice n help

I am  about 3 years out come June my mom passed 2 years ago on the 11Th of this month just before she passed i was down to 160 -150 almost at goal weight .. after she passed my aunt her sister 13 years older than I and was like a big sister more so than an aunt .. Well, I went back to old habits food to chase away the pain and now i am 197lbs no family left and very depressed even though it's been 2 years since i lost her mom that is it still seems like yesterday and now i have no desire or strength so it seems .. But I know I cannot give up Mom was so proud to finally see I was so little since i was always a chubby kid then 300lbs all throughout my life .. my sister she now is doing great but still takes diet pills but she is in NJ and don't talk nor speak to me now since my mom passed .. There is no support group in my town and my mom left me a car and a house but my aunt talked me into saling her the car worth 5 g 's for 3 G's and she robbed me 2 grand no payments since October of 2010, so that sorta messed me up on trying to travel back to Pitt where i had surgery done i was gonna look into getting the stapled in my pouch to tighten it back up I lost all my info but I know the rules protein first and lots of water also my back went out after i lost all that weight so i had surgery done gained 20 lbs but took that off and then gained seems we still have to fight with the surgery's .. I noticed the sick ones stay so small but the ones like me we can eat everything and not get sick have the hardest problems or is it just me and my messed up head? I lost the friends i had on the site i haven't been on for over 1 1/2 if not longer ..

I'm so sorry to hear whats going on with you, I know how you feel with losing your Mom, I lost mine 3 years ago. I really dont know what to say about getting back on track, from what ive read you still have your tool, you just need to get back to the basic's. I think there is also a 5 day pouch test out there. Im sorry i wasnt much help, keep your head up!!!!

Ronda,

Hello from the central PA - I am in Lancaster County.

You are dealing with a lot, my friend. Let me suggest that you return to the boards regularly for support, and that you come over to the PA board. (Click on Forums, then Regional Forums, then PA). This is a very solid group with some members from western PA. Not that it matters - there is a daily check in thread where we just say what we are doing each day, and you would be welcome to get acquainted there and ask for specific support that you need.

Do you have insurance to get some counseling for your depression and grief over losing your mom? Everyone deals with grief differently, but at least a few sessions may help you. The depression issue is very common....but I know it is very hard when it is "you" in this situation.

As for the money and your aunt - well, I'm afraid this is a life lesson learned. As Oprah would say, when people show you who they are....believe them the first time.

Your pouch may not need to be modified, but I do hope you are getting labs done and being monitored by a doctor. If not, make that appointment (even if with your primary care doc) so you know that your labs are in good shape.

Are you taking vitamins?

It's all about small steps. Get a journal or notebook and write things down.
Today's weight. Right now.
Measurements. (Neck. Bust. Rib cage under bustline. Waist. HIp. Above knee. Calf. Upper arm.)
Track your food and water intake for the day tomorrow. Just see where you are.

Then tackle your kitchen. Clean the cupboards and throw out all the crap. You know what it is.

This is a hard journey and you did the right thing by reaching out for support. Hope to see you on the PA board soon, too.

Lynn

thank you both for replyin i'll try to catch on to get to the pa mb's it has changed OH but i'll will have to start as u said i guess i must kick out my roommate as well they r no help or support at all they buy all the bad foods and i see it and want it smell it and want it so i guess in the long run i must make the choice for myself im barely struggling with my head out of the water sort of speak .... Thank u once again..

I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time. I was born and raised in Pittsburgh - I still am only about 25 minutes from the city. They have such a great support group at Magee Women's Hospital where I had my surgery. If you're ever able to get there - it would be well worth your time. It's open to anyone - not just those who had the surgery there. If not, I know only beeing 4 weeks post-op - I have found a TON of help and support here, as you already know!

Unfortunately, RNY isn't a magic cure - it takes lifelong dedication. And I know I'm learning to eat ALL over again! Find some support - I'm sure these boards will help some. And I'm almost positive there is a specific board for people trying to get back on track here.

As for your family issues - I am SO sorry. I went through a very similar situation with my brother and sister. I saw my sister for the first time in almost a year this past week at a baby shower - she sat with her back towards me for THREE hours! Sometimes family (who we're stuck with) treat us worse than friends (who we choose to have in our lives). There's not much we can do about the past. Live for now and the future - but never forget the pride and hope your mom had in you - that will carry you through the worst times.

I'll keep you in my prayers - Praying you find some comfort and especially some support. Keep your chin up, Sunshine - we're all in this together!

~Karen