kinda weird question, but about making friends?

I'm really sorry you feel so alone.

It sounds random, and I don't know what city you live in, but does it have a Craigslist section? Its free, which is why I mention it.

Maybe you can post something on the 'just friends' section, and say that you are looking for someone to go on walks with, to chat, and be friends? And if you meet in public, it should be safe... I've seen posts in my area for work-out partners or people looking to go bike-riding with or walking.

Or what about joining a social group like the Elks or Moose or Eagles? They have those in my area, and it seems like a good social outlet and not too pricey.

I feel really alone right now too. I felt like I hid from my friends the past few years because I was ashamed of gaining 80 pounds over the past 4 years and not feeling great about myself. It wasn't just the weight that got me down, I have some friends that do not support me because of the person I chose to love so I've lost friends that way.... Then some, who I thought were friends until I lost my job and took a job at Starbucks, and when I didn't have my job with the fancy title, stopped being my friend.

I guess I'm just saying that I feel your frustration.

Alissa

p.s. Oh and what about looking here on OH, and post in your local state community... Maybe there is someone there that lives near you. Or maybe your surgeons office knows of someone who lives near you, and they can connect you two up?

I just repeated the same Craigslist idea that Lady Tazz had. Oops... She must be a faster typer than me, hehe!

Lord Kelly, you sound like me stuck out here in the middle of nowhere! We don't have a rec center, exercise classes, not even stop light. I did have physical therapy with one old lady and a really hairy old guy, but that was 25 min away!! We do have more churches around here than people, I think!! But, I am just not the church type. I know the people that are around here, well the types, and I don't fit. I guess that's why I rely on my interwebz friends to talk to. Other than that I've got my mother, who's driving me nuts, and my dogs, which do just fine most of the time!!

If you get any ideas....Share 'em with me!!!

Well, we at least have stop lights, a few of them!

I rely on the internet for friends a lot, but a few real life ones would probably be good too.

I'd hang out with my sister sometimes, but she is 180 miles away.

My mother is also 180 away, but that might be a good thing.

My cats are pretty good at keeping me company and I trust them more than I trust most people, but I can't go out to Starbuck with them.

www.meetup.com

Is there a hospital or library you can volunteer at? Or you can take a laptop, book, newspaper or magazine to a local coffe spot and have coffee, read or surf the internet and maybe meet some people that way. When I moved to my current city I didn't make friends for a long time and it was hard. My partner had friends from work that she did things with. Finally I hung out with some of them and made a few friends. My closest friend is a religious person and while I'm not really we have a lot in common. If I met someone at a yoga class that I got along with I would ask them if they wanted to go out for coffee.

Kelly-

 I don't have any ideas to add but I totally understand your issue. I have always been someone who didn't make friends easily even though people say I am so friendly and easy to get to know. I think I have always had an issue with trusting people or believing I deserved that kind of life. I spent so many years hiding from life b/c of my weight and now that I am losing..I don't know how to reach out. I moved to a new city in the last few years and do not work so it's hard to find people. I do think that having a friend makes life easier so I hope you can find some nice places to look for a buddy. Take care!

                                                                                                      Kim

See, I have a hard time making friends, I think.  I don't know why.  It is hard for me to trust people so I imagine that has something to do with it.  I am friendly and people do not dislike me... I just don't seem to become friends with people.

Have you thought of OA? If there is no meeting nearby, you can start one.

Seeing that you are in a small community, you may not have this option, but my MIL has always turned to painting ceramics to help w/her depression.  In her younger years when she could still drive, she would go buy the greenware, slowly stock up on her own paints, etc and take them back to have them fired, etc.  But over the yrs it got out of her budget and/or lack of places that did it so she would just pick up pieces here and there and paint her own then bought this special clear gloss spray to spray over to preserve the paint. I just found some at a thrift store a few wks ago for her.  Some of these ceramic places offer classes and they have "open" times where you can come and go as you want and use their paints.  Their fees vary, but may be worth looking into.  Some do a project of the month and that is how my MIL met people for a while.  They would all show up for the demo and then sit and visit as they painted their ceramics.
You could do them for gifts or donate them to the elderly in a rest home, etc.  My first Christmas my MIL gave me a set of ceramic ornaments to paint for myself for my first ornaments as a married couple.  Those would be inexpensive to buy to donate.  I know Hobby Lobby (not sure where you live, but Michels may have them too) carries ceramic off and on and they also sell those ornaments at Christmas.  If that doesn't lead you to new friends, at least it gives you an outlet to help w/the depression.

I am in the same boat regarding making friends, but due to having five kids over the years all in one sport or another we knew a lot of people through the kids, but rarely ever longtime close friends.  Everyone is so busy these days they don't have time or make time to be friends any more.  Or it is all take and no give.

If you do not have chidren to link you to people and no longer have work...not sure if you are crafty but sometimes you can find quilting groups, knitting circles, etc.  You may not be able to afford to go back to college for a degree, but maybe take just one class to pick up a hobby.  LIke photography class.  You would meet new people and gain a new hobby.