Are we only pretending? -RNYers (sorta long winded)

I'm not complaining, just had an epiphany this morning. 

Are we only pretending about many things?  I think I might be.  For example, a lot of us eat sugar free this or that and tell ourselves how absolutely delicious it is.  When in reality, pre-op none of us would probably have touched it with a 10' pole.

I have never, in all the years I have eaten "sugar free" stuff because of PCOS, had a sugar free item that didn't have that funny sugar free after taste... but I think over the years I have gotten used to it and just let it go.  Pretending it tastes good for my own sanity maybe.  I tell myself that I don't miss sugar because I haven't had it for so long I forgot what it tastes like.  But am I pretending I don't miss it?

Luckily or unluckily I was / still am a low carb dieter for years, but post-op many of us are forced to be low carb for one reason or another.  Then the noodle craving starts for one reason or another.  Even if you weren't a noodle eater pre-op, you want noodles. 

In desperation for something noodle like, we choke down some product that tricks us to think we are eating noodles.  Again, pretending.  I remember years ago, before I had given up on ever eating noodles again, I ate the Dreamfields low carb noodles.  I remember thinking it was like eating dried up crabgrass from my yard that was soaked in some water.  But I ate them and was like "wow noodles".  I never ate them again. 

And now, bread.  That magic fluffy white pure refined carb sensation we use to hold delicious items together.  I used to be a slave to sourdough.  The crustier, the better.  Just had a conversation about it last night with my husband, about how in SanFrancisco they make the best sourdough probably in the world.  I haven't had bread or anything bread like (i.e. wraps) in probably over 10 months.  I think I am pretending I don't want it... I'm not sure.

And dont even get me started on vitamins that look / taste like candy.. i.e. my calcium chews.  Or protein bars called "Dark Chocolate Decadence".. ugh.

Your thoughts are appreciated if you can make it through my long winded post.  Are you pretending about anything?

While I get what your saying...

I don't eat "sugar free" items. Although I used to like the regular yoplait many many years ago, but now it tastes to sweet to me. I'll eat a piece of chocolate on occasion, even the occasional candy bar. Not often but once or twice a month. There are a few pieces of sugar free treats I've had and not minded but that was pre-op. I'm not a huge sweet eater usually, but when I want something sweet I'll give it a taste. I can take a bite or two of a candy bar and put the rest in the fridge for later. So once candy bar can last almost a week!

I eat noodles on occasion as well, in fact maybe once a week? I also eat rice, bread and other pasta. I don't do it often but i'm not "low carbing" all the time. I watch what quanaties I eat, but as long as I'm eating them in moderation and I'm maintaining my weight, I don't really worry about it. I do still step on the scale every morning so I do know right away if my eating needs any adjusting or I need to up my exercise routine.

I guess I'm not really "pretending" about anything. If I don't like something I don't eat it. I don't believe in "dieting" for the rest of my life. I will eat whatever I want in moderation, with size portion control and not as an everyday thing. I eat protein forward meals, yes, but I don't worry about a 1/2 cup of rice a week. I eat protein bars, but I liked them pre-op as well. LOL.

Early out I was much stricter on what I would eat, but never in a "food police" way.  I did follow my plan, but the closer I got to my goal, I relaxed a little bit, but never totally "went wild". I do know which foods are my triggers and don't have them in my house often (I'm a Nacho Dorrito's fan, so they are only allowed in the house once or twice a year, usually around the holidays. lol)

I do stay away from carbonated beverages altogther but really, I don't miss them anymore. I did in the beginning but I'm carbonated free for almost 2 1/2 years now and figure why start it now.

Truly the only thing I really miss(ed) was eating cereal with milk. makes me sick to my stomach every time. I can have each seperately but put them together and UGH!! I also missed my salads for the first year or so, but pouchy pooh has decided that I can eat the green leafy stuff again finally so I'm back to my yummy summer salads this year! WOOT. LOL.

I love the harder breads (the european style) compaired to the really soft american style breads, they make great sandwiches. LOL. But yeah, I don't do them to often usually. and if I do over do the carbs I'll end up with gas that could kill the unsuspecting person. LOL. 

However, having said all that. My taste buds have changed since surgery. I don't like the really, REALLY spicy hot stuff anymore. Some things are way to sweet and I can't stand the taste. Other things are more acidic tasting than they used to be. I do miss the tall cold glass of OJ I used to have on occasion, but now the taste just turns me off. It used to taste SO GOOD though. I dream about how it used to taste. LOL. But one sip now and I'm Ugh. So maybe my memory is better than what the reality used to be?

Sorry for the book. lol. Best of luck with your weight loss journey!

i am only little over 6 week post op and i started eating sugar free stuff way before the surgery. We always dranked sugar free soda. sugar free kool aid. so those does not bother me since they never change , just dont drink as much of the soda at this point. my  fiance bought me a cook book from QVC that everything is made with splenda and is low cal, low carb meals. I made orange chicken before my surgar and now our friends that ate it with us and my fiance wants me to make that again. they were bragging about it yesturday at a party how much they liked it. I now use slpenda for many things and to me even the sweets i make for my man taste like they have sugar in them. I dont make too much sweets but at times i do make him something with chocolate in it since he loves chocolate. When taking my vitamins i dont think of it as anything but something for my health. Since i been taking meds for other things its just a natural routine for me to take the vitamins now. I buy what ever is cheaper at the time and at times I get buy one get one free which i like those deals. I always have sugar free candies here and little lolly pops for my grandkids but what i need to find is the sugar free lollypops because i am so scared to eat the sugar free hard candy cause a fraid of swollowing it by accident and it getting caught so i stopped eating them but have them here for guest that are diabettic. Once I start eating the food thats better for me i dont think of them as sugar free just good tatsing foods that i can enjoy and not worry about the sugar intake just eat them moderatle like we all should. ......Roxanne   

My biggest epiphany is that I now eat to live and no longer live to eat. I do what I have to do to remain healthy. Food no longer is what keeps me happy. Life keeps me happy. Is it all worth it? Definitely!!

Laura

I can only speak for myself.  I have been very open here -- and have (willingly) taken grief  periodically -- about the fact that I MUCH prefer to eat a smaller amount of  something that truly tastes GOOD (that have real sugar, etc.) than to eat a larger amount of a SF item or some "WLS friendly" recipe.  If something does not taste GOOD -- not just "ok" and not just not just "not bad.... for a high protein snack" -- I do not eat it... and over the past 4 years I have found (and admitted) that protein bars, crunchy protein snacks, etc,. do NOT taste good.  I love ice cream and frozen yogurt, but I was never able to make a protein ice cream recipe that tasted anywhere near yummy to me. (I do like SF popsicles, Jello, pudding, and Nilla Wafers, though.)  If I really have a craving for pasta, I eat some pasta... I just have a very small amount of it.  I am not someone who can have "forbidden" foods... it is deadly to me psychologically because it makes me want it even more... and because I can have  a small amount of whatever I want and be satisfied with that small amount, there is no reason for me NOT to have what I truly enjoy instead of "settling" for something that's "just ok".

I eat a lot of whole, raw foods and very little processsed foods other than occasional frozen dinners (and most special bariatric items like protein bars are as processed as you can get!).  This approach is just part of my process of completely reworking my relationship with food.  I would be MISERABLE eating protein bars, protein pretzels, and protein ice cream for the rest of my life.  I had this surgery to be able to truly ENJOY my life... and that includes enjoying my FOOD.

This approach might not work for everyone, but it is what works for me. 

Lora

but see... thats the problem.  You totally said what I think is on my mind. 

When do I get to enjoy myself?

Am I a slave to food?  I dont know.  I am too early out to from my surgery to "do what I want" I think.  I only had my 5 mo anniversary a couple days ago.  I am chinese for goodness sakes and I cant even eat rice.

I gave up soda and fast food joints in 1998 because of obesity and PCOS... so I am not saying to enjoy myself I need to eat at Mcdonalds or drink Coke Zero, but what I am saying is:

When can I stop stressing or pretending when it comes to food?  I think I am more obsessed over food now post-op then I ever was pre-op with my PCOS.  What to eat, what not to eat, too much fat content, too much sugar content, too many carbs, too many whatever else...... ugh

Why can't you eat a little rice? I love chinese food and eat rice on occasion. Why not eat smaller amounts of things you like rather than "pretend" you like the stuff you eat? At five months out unless it actually makes you dump or doesn't agree a little rice isn't going to hurt you as long as you aren't eating it for every meal everyday.

I followed the rules, and ate the nasty protein bars when i wanted "a treat" (yuck!  not much of a treat!), et****il after I was about 18 months out (it took me 20 montsh to lose 185 pounds to get to my goal).  It hink it is extremely important to use that first year to get rid of the old bad eating habits.

What I wish I had done, however -- instead of making myself miserable trying to convince myself that ti was "worth it" to be eating a protein bar instead of a chocolate bar -- was to spend more time finding something that was NEITHER a protein bar or a chocolate bar... to find one of the fresh fruit and Cool Whip concoctions that I enjoy so much now instead of enduring eating the protein bar and lamenting the fact that what I wanted was chocolate.  So, that would be my suggestion for you... find  foods that you truly like (preferably fresh, natural foods) and are healthy and fit into your food plan, but also taste GOOD.  Then, once you are much further down the road, and have new eating habits in place, you can add in small amounts of treats.

Lora

I eat rice but not too much. You should try it if you really want to eat it. I have no problems with it at all.

Lora - I agree with you 100%!!!!!!!!!!!!!