Judgement

When I was pre op and very new post op I was very happy to tell any one who asked that I was having or did have WLS.  But the more people I told the more I found that there was little support out there for people who were trying to better their lives and health in this way.  In fact, it seemed that more people were very judgmental rather then supportive.  NOT EVERYONE! Of course my close friends and family have been wonderful...and most people are pretty cool with it, but I just began to notice that the mention of WLS brings up alot of negative comments.

This is the one I hate the most...

"Omg!  You look great how did you lose so much weight?"
me: "I had WLS about 3 months ago"
"Oh, really?  My mom's, uncles, friends, brothers, wife's, cousins, sister's, son had that surgery and they died"
My reply "really!  What a shame.  Well I know quite a few people that died from being obese so I guess I will take my chances!"

I have been judged by so many people, even the xray tech at my doctor's office when I told them (it came up in conversation due to the injury).  After that I stopped telling people.

Do you get judged?  If so, what is your worst story or funnies comment?  I would love to hear your come backs!

YES! I am still pre-op and was going to be open and honest with people about what I am doing and the steps I have had to take to make this decision, UNTIL I was shocked to see and hear how people are so uneducated about it. I mean I could take the time to say, well it's not the easy way out, I will have to do this, and that, and its a lifestyle not a quick fix etc. I was even told by the tech doing my cardiac stress test...."I think fat people should just be put on a island or somewhere and not allowed to leave until they lose the weight and do it the hard way, with working out and healthy eating". I was so mad and hurt that he would be so stupid and what if he had said that to someone who has serious self-esteem issues?!?! I did report him, because he was out of line I think. 

I was even told this past week when I went for my pre-op at the hospital, "your one of the smallest patients we have ever had this done" I am 5'2 and 226, that puts me with a BMI of 40 and uh I have comorbs...ugh Anyways, I know my family supports me and my close friends are and of course I have OH! I think when people ask "how did you lose all this weight", I will answer with a lot of hard work, dedication, and a total lifestyle change! That's not a lie, right

Good for you!  that you reported him!  What an ass!

I tell people when they ask how I lost the weight, "hard work" and I'm not lying either!  This way I tell the truth, they get an answer and I save myself the endless comments they feel so FREE to give me if I tell them I had RNY.  I don't know what it is that makes people think that just because I tell them I had surgery that means I want their opinion on the subject. 

I'm really glad to hear you reported him.  that is totally out of line.

I tell people I maybe fat but they're ugly and I can lose weight!

 LMAO!!  Love love love it!  Good For you!

I stopped telling people a long time ago. I just have a general response for the ones who I know that have'nt seen me for years. I just say, "Well, I got my **** together." And that seems to satisfy their curiosity. But for the ones who have made comments, I just tell them that is their opinion but facts speak for themselves and I did what I needed to do to be healthier.

There are always gonna be haters out there, people are always going to say that WLS is a copout, but the truth is, the very same people who talk sh*t are the ones that are uneducated and have not had someone they love that has been affected by obesity.

Paul, I have found that most of the haters are people who are overweight themselves.  Maybe they want the surgery but can't get it or maybe they are afraid.  Maybe they know they need it and don't want to get it so they bash those of us who has found the courage to do it.

It was the hardest decision I ever made, having this surgery.  For almost a year I fought my emotions and the feelings of failure that I could not do it myself.  I have now come to terms with what I did and what needed to be done, what I don't need is the judgment or opinions of others.  Whats done is done, so whatever they have to say about it now.....TO LATE!   

BTW, how did the tummy tuck go?  Didn't you have it in the beginning of this month?

I too don't like to talk about my surgery. My close friends and family know and a year out a lot of others in my life do too (coworkers, acquaintances, etc) b/c people always talk. Now, when I see someone I haven't seen in a long time and they ask how I lost weight. I just say, "A lot of hard work." I've had a few people who have commented, "You have to tell me your secret!" and I say, "There really isn't a secret to weight loss is there?"

I'm still pre op but the only people I have told was my best friend I have known for 13 years and my close family(my husband of course, parents, grand parents, my favorite aunt and my sister). Of course someone talked and now every one and their brother knows! ( i think it was my mom) lol. But I haven't received any negativity yet!!! yet being the key word lol