Need to vent about poor fashion choices post wls
OK, I know I shouldn't judge but I'm struggling with some of the fashion choices post wls people (sometimes even myself) are making. Have you ever looked at the before and after photos and seen people in miniskirts and lace tops which are too short and too revealing? I guess I just find it uncomfortable when people dress like they're younger than they are or in clothes that would get them a spot on "What Not To Wear." I have been thinking about this a lot since I have noticed that sometimes I'm uncomfortable in clothes that are too big...it makes me a little nervous like I might fill them up again. So, I wear more fitted clothes and then I wonder, do I look like I'm trying too hard or have I crossed the line from tailored/fitted to tight or revealing? I'm not really a modest person but I have to admit that this topic of how to dress pushes some buttons for me. I'm not sure why it does but I had to vent because I don't want to be a judgemental **** about others or even myself. Weird how even with positive progress there can be struggles, like this. Taking it one day, one outfit at a time... Any thoughts?
Funny enough I look at the before and after pics and I have the same thoughts about the people wearing EXACTLY what they were wearing before...
My thought is that they could never pull it off before and hot damn they will now... I think is about being confident and even if its not the socially acceptable norm in cloths, I say the same thing I say to a Big girl in a Bikini at the beach... "YOU GO GIRL"...
My thought is that they could never pull it off before and hot damn they will now... I think is about being confident and even if its not the socially acceptable norm in cloths, I say the same thing I say to a Big girl in a Bikini at the beach... "YOU GO GIRL"...
For me - fashion wasn't something i worried a ton about. I got what fit, usually looser then necessary because it made me more comfortable.
"fashion" is just foreign to me. I don't wear mini skirts, but I get some anxiety over the whole topic now. I was never a slob or anything, I have a professional job, but being MO, my choices were much more limited.
I wouldn't assume most people are trying to over compensate, they just may not know.
"fashion" is just foreign to me. I don't wear mini skirts, but I get some anxiety over the whole topic now. I was never a slob or anything, I have a professional job, but being MO, my choices were much more limited.
I wouldn't assume most people are trying to over compensate, they just may not know.
Follow my vegan transition at www.bariatricvegan.com
HW:288 CW:146.4 GW: 140 RNY: 12/22/11
I tend to agree with you on this one. I also dislike the after photos taken in say, a pair of sweat pants and an oversized t-shirt. I know it was hard to find clothes that were flattering when I was bigger, but there shouldn't be a problem most of the time when you reach goal.
Sandy
HW 225, SW 219, GW 140, CW 124
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!
I think folks may just be trying something they've never been able to do before because that style didn't come in plus plus sizes. It is very brave for them to do that actually - stepping out of a comfort zone. I find it a bit odd you are uncomfortable by what another person is doing. How does what they do hurt or affect you? If you're just uncomfortable about what YOU might look like to others - ask a friend before venturing out. Hold an in-house fashion show with a couple of friends to see what works and what doesn't. A 'rule of thumb' for me is that if you can see underwear outlines it is too tight for me to wear (assuming you wear underwear). As far as 'younger' clothes - well that has changed quite a bit over the years. just because you're 40 or whatever doesn't mean you can't wear jeans and are relegated to polyester pants (my 70's era coming out). Actually I'm not sure what dressing your age means - I dress my body shape. For me I wear elbow length sleeves so the extra skin is camo'ed for example.
RNY on 05/07/12
There is nothing worse than seeing someone in their 40's or 50's trying to dress like a 20 year old. Just because you can fit into some things doesn't mean you should wear it. A class act is to wear what is flattering and age appropriate. You can be youthful looking and still dress with a wonderful fashion sense. but when I see young women even wearing tight spandex tops, I am sad that no one taught them any better to know at 250 lbs. it looks bad. Skinny jeans are for skinny people. Nice jeans that flatter, do just that. Jane
I know exactly how you feel. I haven't worn my current size since I was 18 and I am now 37. I find my self picking clothes like I'm 18 again because I can wear the sizes that those clothes are made in. I basically lived in tent like shirts for 15 years so everything that I wear seems tight. I have told my friends to tell me if I wear things that are inappropiate. I seem to be a bad judge of it.
I'm wondering why you have a problem with people that make those sorts of fashion choices post WLS but no when people that never had surgery make them. Why would it be a problem for me to wear a miniskirt and lace top after I've lost 150 lbs but not a problem for my sister, who has never been overweight, to wear that?
It does bother me when people wear particularly revealing clothing, especially in certain settings. I remember going to church one day and this woman there was talking to me and she had this top that was so low cut I thought her breasts were going to fall out. Seriously. The whole time she was talking to me, I was trying to look at her face, not her chest, but it was hard because the top was just so revealing and inappropriate. And I kept wondering why on earth someone would choose that top to wear to church. I mostly don't care what people wear, I think they should wear whatever makes them comfortable, but I do think certain body parts ought to be securely under clothing.
It does bother me when people wear particularly revealing clothing, especially in certain settings. I remember going to church one day and this woman there was talking to me and she had this top that was so low cut I thought her breasts were going to fall out. Seriously. The whole time she was talking to me, I was trying to look at her face, not her chest, but it was hard because the top was just so revealing and inappropriate. And I kept wondering why on earth someone would choose that top to wear to church. I mostly don't care what people wear, I think they should wear whatever makes them comfortable, but I do think certain body parts ought to be securely under clothing.
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