Eye Opening

Although i understand your point about those who disappear (I know both who who have disappeated and kept their weight off and tjaoe who ahve regained), I agree with Kelly and Kim.  No one who comes here has any obligation and the VAST majority (my personal estimate would be well over 90%) of people just drop off of here before they are 18 months out, many long before that.

I understand yoru current enthusiasm, given where you are at in your journey, but I will be interested to see how long you remain here.  This is one of the reasons that the few of us sphere who have stayed for more than 3 or 4 years to pay it forward (andget support ourselves) get so annoyed when newbies come in and complain about us being "mean" or not remembering how hard it was (which, trust me, we do) or whatever.  But 99% of the complainers will be gone in 6 months... And we still be here (probably).

Lora

As a newbie without a support group (they meet at the same time I see my therapist) I depend on this site and all the information I gain. Kelly has been especially helpful when I have had a question. I appreciate the people who do take the time to post.

Lyn

Both Kelly and Lora are here slogging away at giving help. I was not in anyway talking about you folks being lazy or not contributing to the effort. I and many here recognize your efforts and appreciate you. So I am not bashing you at all and if you felt I was, I apologize. Maybe my choice of words was inappropriate. There are others as well who are doing their best to help and have been here a long time, supporting others. I was trying to encourage others to post their experiences and let us know all is well with them but I think my comments did the opposite and for that I am sorry. 
But I can tell you that I may be new at WLS, but I am not new at losing weight and have made all the mistakes I see others doing. Should I just shut up, and let them go, or try to encourage them to take corrective actions. Staying active on a page like this is one thing that can keep us on the straight and narrow path for a lifetime not just 10 years or so. 
I have strong opinions built over my 70 years of life and over 50 years fighting the weight loss buggy man. I am, and continue to be very active on other pages like this and contribute to some for over 15 years. I am not going away, I will be here unless they throw me off. I may not agree with you always, and you may not agree with me, but I am going to say what I feel is appropriate and do my best to give my experiences in my profile and Blog. I will post photos and experiences both good and bad in hopes that they will help other. But then again that is just my way, I have nothing to hide and my life is pretty much an open book and I like it like that. You may not and that is your privilege. 
So again I was not pointing at anyone specifically and if I hurt your feelings I am profusely sorry.   
 

I think you are a great contributor to this board, Larry - no nonsense (my kinda guy)! There is a world of difference between those of us that are 0-4 and those that are 5+ years out though and we all have something to offer.

I didn't gain an ounce until I was about 4 years out when I got the silent creep - I did nothing different - so it does amuse me somewhat when people that are 1, 2 or 3 years out are giving advice based on their veterans experience of maintaining!!!!!! This weight thing is a permanently shifting situation as you get further out, get older etc so those that have had long term experiences prior to WLS definitely have good (and bad) experiences to share also ...

Oh well, OH is full of different personalities - and we all have a place here, hopefully for the long haul!

ETA: There is a long history on OH of scammers and stalkers - most of us that are a few years out are reluctant to allow people to access too much of our lives - this can be a pretty scarey place at times ... Thankfully it does seem to have improved over the years, but it's hard for us old dogs to learn new tricks and trust again!

No, no worries, Larry... No offense taken.

Lora

Then there are those of us here every day but rarely posting because we have nothing to add. I'm dealing with some regain and a lot of my own demons right now, but I read everyday and occasionally I find a post that i feel I can give advice on, but a lot of them I just skip because I see they have already been answered and I have nothing to add. Plus, a lot of them I have no experience with. But I'm still here, just lurking.

Jan

I am glad you are still here but please don't think you have nothing to contribute.  I stopped interacting with my support systems when the weight started coming back.  Instead of seeking help I became humiliated about my weight gain and quit posting and eventually reading.  When I needed support the most I left because I felt like a failure.  And the sad thing is because I felt like a failure unworthy of help, I became a failure because I stopped trying.  That was also the reason I stopped seeing my surgeon, because I was embarrassed and fearful that I would be lectured when the truth is when I did go back I got understanding and help.
Of course you have something to add.  I feel that if nothing else I can use my experience as a cautionary tale of what not to do.  Maybe I went through what I did so that others may not have to if they choose to learn from my mistakes.  Of course being the way I am I never was able to learn from anything other then my own mistakes.  Because I am different and special, you know.

Wow what a great post!  I too often wonder where others from years back are today, how are they doing. For me I've really felt that maintaining a presence to some degree on WLS support broads is a necessity, not an option. I've also found for the most part people I've met IRL that have had WLS and remaIn active in support settings are maintaining with little to no regain and those that aren't have seen various degrees of regain, some significant. 

Mourning food since early out hasn't been much of a problem, although a couple of times like you I felt resentment that I couldn't enjoy a nice dinner out with others. Thankfully it's a fleeting moment of regret

 Awesome thread Ladytazz ... I am still here at 5 years 7 months... never strayed away ... I love the interaction with people who are or were where I once was or am now ... I love it all .. I love the interactions and the camaraderie ... I can discern enough to stay away from stuff that does not sit well with my spirit ... OH has offered and awesome venue for me on this journey and I really appreciate it and take full advantage of it to keep the focus ... to pay it forward when I can ... and to learn and share in others' experiences..... I get/take empowerment from anywhere and everywhere ... even this awesome quote that someone shared elsewhere yesterday that fits my philosophy to the "T" ...

  

Yup ... 5 years and 7 months and I am here ... even when I don't post or may not have the chance to reply I always make an OH stop ...

I am more more than 6 years post op and will always seek out groups like this for support. Many want to move on to a "normal life" and I respect that, but for me, it's important to stay connected. I am not a frequent poster, but I read every day and post when I need or want to. I still go to my hospital support group, but not monthly like I did in the beginning, and am trying to get them to start a "veteran's" group for long term post ops like myself. I so appreciate the regular posters who have stepped up and tirelessly give of their time and energy here. New arrivals as well as returning members like myself benefit from it.