Bad day....Could use some encouragement!!
So today was my first really BAD day since I had RNY a month ago....I went home with the plan of walking out my frustration. I walked just under a mile because it was sooooooo cold (40 and REALLY windy) before I gave in and left. I then felt slightly annoyed with myself for wimping out on the rest of my walk (but seriously I've been freezing since I came home from the hospital anyways!) After my walk I had to go to the grocery store. I seriously spent about 40 minutes just wandering around the store looking at all the foods that I would have bought several months ago to deal with a day like today. I'm happy to report that even though I did look longingly at each of those foods I never had any intention of buying any and I left the store with only the items I needed and planned to buy. After going home, having my healthy dinner, and finding a warm blanket I'm feeling much better. This is my first post surgery experience with missing my past behaviors and it did make me feel slightly crazy. Please tell me I'm not the only one that had these thoughts!!!!
I think there are many people on the same boat as you, myself included. It used to be that we basically self-medicated with food, as a panacea for all kinds of things, be them anxiety, stress, depression, anger, avoidance, etc, etc. We can change our GI, but we can't change our minds through surgery...it takes hard work and time to reverse the learned behaviors that we adapted in the past to deal with things. I'm really proud of you for saying no, even though you clearly wanted to. I too have those days/moments where I feel the need to alleviate all kinds of things through food. Generally, I'll go to the kitchen, open the fridge, stare longingly, then go back to whatever I was doing. Lately, it's been less and less, even though I've been getting hungrier, I've significantly decreased the urge to eat for other reasons. I've been our of surgery for about the same time as you and it's been a learning process!
Just stay firm and remember the payoff, a longer, happier life! xx
on 10/3/14 4:00 pm
It's like learning to walk again. Spending more time in the store will give you more time the read labels. Foods that are good for us are sold on the perimeter of the store. Stay out of the isles. That is where the crap is
feel better
"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue." --- Dorothy Parker
"You may not like what I say or how I say it, but it may be just exactly what you need to hear." ---Kathryn White
I think most of us have those thoughts sometimes,especially at first. After all,we've spent a lifetime using food to try to fill all sorts of needs. That doesn't change overnight with surgery. It sounds like you did exactly what is needed--you looked and moved on. As you get farther out those times of missing our old ways don't come as often and get easier to handle. Hang in there you are doing great!
On a cold windy depressing day I do my walking at the mall. I walk from store to store looking at great clothing choices in smaller sizes that I can set a goal of getting into. I go to the grocery store with a carefully prepared list and don't even look at the "bad" foods. I get out of there as quickly as possible.
Real life begins where your comfort zone ends
It sounded like you handled things well. You're going to have bad days. Everyone does. It might be good to come up with a plan for how you're going to handle bad days in the future, because I'm sure you will have them again at some point. Having a plan makes it easier to deal with. It might help to actually write the plan down so you don't have to try to remember it when you're stressed about something.
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
