Dont get mad at me.....but

Ok, here it goes... I know that I will make some of you guys get frustrated with me, but no one else understands and I feel like maybe you guys wont either..... I feel sort of like a failure. I have not lost all the weight that I wanted to. I thought that I would have lost more weight with my WLS.  I remember reading on this web site when I was pre-op and would see the before and after pics and read profiles and think... wow, will that be me??? will I be that small? Will I run a marathon too? Will I take up hiking or biking or jogging? Will I be able to wear a size 4? Now, dont get me wrong. I am totally happy with the way I am. For the most part I feel physically GREAT! My back doesn't hurt, my hips and feet don't hurt and I can go up and down a flight of stairs with ease. BUT... my brain is not satisfied. My brain tells me that I am not good enough. My crazy brain tells me that I am a partially a failure. I cant explain it. I know that I am doing great. I am a success!!! But today has been a down one for me and I have retaliated my success with poor eating choices. I feel like sometimes, subconsciously, I TRY to sabotage my loss by eating. ???? Thanks for the vent and sorry in advance if I have made anyone roll their eyes and curse me under their breath thinking that I am totally crazy. Tootles cath PS>>> I told you it was a bad day for me......

Your to funny , Im not gonna flame ya nor roll my eyes, look at me. I do this and go threw this every day I feel like a failure BUT Im alive and I dont try to focus on the weight im not loosing though Id love to loose another 40 pounds but will I? Probaley not Im trying to deal everyday to be satisfied w/ where I am. I know its hard its out pee brains acting ignorant. But we have to pray and ask the good Lord to keep us sane and to guide us through choosing the good food choices. And I know you are a christian lady. So keep praying and Im doing the same for you. Thats why it is SO IMPORTANT to have our meets every months so we can meet others w/ the same and simular problems we all have our secrests we dont share here. SO keep coming to our meets an maybe each month we need to take a subject an discuss after our lunch an that way we will be helping each other w/ differnt situations that pop up.... Hugsssss....... 

Thanks Prissy, You are so sweet. With out you all on this VA board I would surely loose my focus. We are all in this together. Pray pray pray.. The good Lord will take care of the rest. Right? Hugs!!! Cath

AMEN sister!!!!!!! Thats why we are here right!!! : ) Keep the faith.... Let me know when you wanna come over for lunch Im flexable.

And why oh why would you think anyone here would flame you? Crazy woman.LOL  Our brains take a long time to catch up. And even then we still have really bad days.  I don't know about you but it took a long time for me to even admit to myself that I was fat. Self affirmation is a great thing, but I believe it only goes so far. And that is why we have each other!! So get up brush yourself off and get right back to doing the things you learned. big hugs

Thats a good Idea, brush myself off and get back on track. Forget today and focus on tomorrow! Whoo Hoo!! That is just what I will do! Thanks! Cath

Hello Cath... I don't think you know me but please allow me to introduce myself.  My name is Kathy and I had a very long process in getting my approval for my WLS.  I think we all go through this feeling of failure from one time or ther other.  I still feel like I'm a size 28 and have trouble shopping for the right size.  I'm still losing and that's great but my head is having a hard time accepting the fact that I'm not fat anymore.  Try to love yourself for all the accomplishments you've made this far.  We are all here for you.... Always, Kathy

Nice to meet you Kathy,  It takes a life time to gain our weight and I guess it will take a life time to keep it off and let our minds catch up. Tootles Cath

First you must be having a bad day ... cuz ... you are saying 2 different things ... and I totally understand .  You know in your heart that you have succeeded .. and that you look great .. it is those devilish voices we hear in our heads that want to defeat us . You have to be stronger than those voices and know where you stand .  We all make poor eating choices .. and if there is one person that can sit here and tell me that through their entire journey they have not eaten things that are bad .. then I would like to meet them and give them the PERFECT medal .. We for the most part are addicts .. food addicts .. and we are going to make mistakes . It is who we are .. and when you have one of those days .. you just gota get over it and start again the next day .  Try not to be so hard on yourself ... you are awesome .. you have done so very well .. the trick is to honestly one hundred percent believe in yourself .. no one else is going to do it for you .. and you deserve all that life has for you .. but you gotta believe in you ... bottom line .  No rolling of my eyes .. just an understanding of where you are coming from ... and lot's of respect for you ...  Always,  Tink

Hi Tink! I hope ya'all have a great time this weekend. I was hoping to come down, but things are so hectic here.  I know that everyday is a new day and I need to put this one behind me. Being a food addict makes dealing with the day to day  ups and downs that much more challenging.  You are really one amazing lady. You are an inspiration to all of us on this board. Thanks Cath